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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to go off at delivery drivers

60 replies

qtpa2t · 31/08/2022 20:19

Im at a loss and definitely at the end of my patience here. just wanted to share here to see if it would annoy you all too.
I'm honestly (promise!!!) not a stroppy person. I don't send food back in restaurants and things like that. I don't complain for small reasons, life's too short. But we've been renting our current place for almost a year and this is driving me nuts.

Without revealing our real address let's say we live at 7 Big Hippo Road. It's a very big new build development with hundreds of apartments and so luck would have it we live in apartment 7B. For some unknown reason it's a huge ordeal for people to type out Big Hippo road and EVERY single day, several times a day we get deliveries for basically anywhere in the building addressed to 7 B Hippo Road (usually the apartment number is like on the next line and delivery drivers are just careless). When I say every day; I mean every single day. And, more annoyingly, night too (late night pizzas etc)
We have an intercom downstairs so first they ring the intercom which even at its lowest setting is fairly loud (can't turn it off as we also get deliveries quite often, most our household essentials are on monthly order with Amazon). I have a one month old and a two year old. When I was pregnant sleep was very hard to come by. My two year old wakes up at 6 am every day. The only time I could nap was when she napped and if I got woken up it was so so hard to fall asleep again. Cute the motherforking deliveries that aren't for us. i get 15 minutes sleep, get woken up, can't fall asleep again.

Even worse, then someone orders a pizza or Chinese at 1 am. We ALL get woken up. Imagine having a toddler and newborn woken up in the middle of the night, I've literally shed tears over this, it's exhausting and just such an unnecessary hardship. Obviously also now our one month old especially gets woken up by the doorbells and some of them also talk really loud. Especially the royal mail driver we have. He is here like every day, making the same mistake every day!

We can mute the intercom overnight but we forget to do it a lot of the time, or then forget to unmute it's and end up missing our own deliveries.

so I started being very mean to delivery drivers. I can't help it I literally started to hate them. They ARGUE WITH ME. I used to say: it's not for me, show me what the address says, and point out where the flat number is written down. They would get annoyed, and say it says 7B!! And I'm like: do you think I ordered food, paid for it, and now decided I don't want it any more? Or do you think I did this asos shop and then decided I can't be asked and not to receive it? I don't get it why are they fighting with me?
so now I literally just tell them off and talk to them like they're toddlers and tell them they have one job and they suck at it etc and honestly that's just not the person I like to be. It's kind of satisfying in the moment but long term it's definitely negativity I could live without.

If anyone has any suggestions I would appreciate them 😫 maybe I can take this to the concierge and tell them to screen everyone coming in, but I just dont think it's possible. Mind you when my cat died the same day my baby was born, i ran out in my socks to get him to the emergency vet and came home without him, devastated, not even recovered from the absolute terror that my labour was and the little f*cker at the concierge desk decided to ask me if I live there. I get it I'm a barefoot mess but fi you can screen me screen the delivery drivers too I guess? Just such an annoying situation sorry and thank you if you read it all

OP posts:
Horcruxe · 31/08/2022 20:49

Can you put a sticker or some kind of sign covering up the like someone else suggested.

So a removable sticker, with a different letter. E.g. a letter that isn't used.
And just adopt the new address.

So again the delivery drivers will have to look closer at the delivery address as there isnt an apartment 7b

qtpa2t · 31/08/2022 20:51

chillivanilli · 31/08/2022 20:42

I "accidentally" broke my intercom when the neighbours kids and their visitors kept ringing it everyday! Best thing that ever happened tbh peace at last.
I get everything to a P.O. Box and collect them one a week. Although I don't have as many deliveries as you by the sounds of it. Friends and family call me at the door and I go down and let them in.
It's been at least a year now I love having no intercom 😬

That sounds so peaceful.
this is probably quite stupid but I didn't realise there were P.O. Boxes in England 😯

OP posts:
Skatewing · 31/08/2022 20:52

Just here to say that I would love to live in a place called Big Hippo Road.
Sorry, not helpful. 😳

GretaVanFleet · 31/08/2022 20:56

I get your frustration but the delivery driver isn’t going to know you have two young children nor that it’s happened x number of times already that day or week. They have made a mistake that you acknowledge is easy to make. No one deserves to be abused doing their job. That aside do you like the person you become when this happens and is that how you want your DC to see you?

unvillage · 31/08/2022 20:57

Oh this is so annoying, I'm in a similar (but far less extreme situation) - I live in one of two small blocks of flats, one by the road and the other you cross the cark park to access, so delivery people tend to go for the closest building and then argue with me when I tell them it's the other one. But it says flat 8!! Yes and if you look there's another number below, where it says the building number? Yeah it's not this building. They almost always argue it.

SeaToSki · 31/08/2022 21:01

Can you have all of your deliveries left with the concierge, then you just grab them at the end of the day/convenient moment. And then mute the doorbell all the time. Tell anyone coming over to see you to text you when they arrive.

Needmorelego · 31/08/2022 21:04

Can you talk to the owners of the building about this. The other residents might also have issues with them not receiving their deliveries.
Instead of the building being 7 Big Hippo Road could the building be changed to Hippo House or something.
I have no idea how difficult that would be though.

toooldtocarewhoknows · 31/08/2022 21:14

If you can bear it just try accepting everything for a few weeks.

Eventually the word will filter back and as the complaints pile in people will take more care in addressing this.

It will only be by people complaining their order hasn't arrived and being compensated that take away places will pay more attention to the correct address.

You'll be in for a mammoth few weeks of deliveries but they will get less.

Can you buzz down and remotely open the front door? Or do you have a tradesman's button you can get them to leave the parcel/food inside?

You have to inconvenience the source so much they take action. Otherwise nothing changes.

FitFat · 31/08/2022 21:17

Sorry to be dumb but I am confused about your address. Are you at like Flat 7, 7 Mill Lane and people just see 7 and assume you are the right address?
Anyway can see why its annoying, esp with small kids!!

PinkButtercups · 31/08/2022 21:24

No that would be annoying and it's disruptive.

I have the problem where our house is right behind a close sign that isn't our road. Whoever decided that was a good idea needs a good talking too. I was once outside and a lady got out delivering Chinese and said 'ohh you're eager for your food' I said excuse me? She said
'Well you're out here waiting for your food' erm no I'm not.. I said she had the wrong address and argued with me for two minutes that this was the right address 🤦🏻‍♀️. She eventually realised her mistake and got in her care and drove off to where she was meant to deliver. No apology or anything.

I once had two delivery guys at my door with a mattress and told them I didn't order one.. 'well this is the address it's down at' sure it was my address, completely different name and I said to them it isn't me!

PinkButtercups · 31/08/2022 21:24

Car*

Teaandcrumpets95 · 31/08/2022 21:25

I understand this frustration!

I like at 1 Elmer Close opposite 1 Elmer Street (both fake) and we both get drivers going to the wrong one. It's especially annoying for us as we have the address on a plaque next to our actual door!

But I'll be honest I would never be so rude to the delivery people, it's very annoying but at the end of the day they're just doing their job. Don't have a solution other than mute your intercom and try not to give it more headspace.

Whatatimetobealivetoday · 31/08/2022 21:25

@qtpa2t i just wanted to say I am so sorry about your cat and I’m not surprised you need to vent having been through all that and having a newborn I really feel for you!!!!

Soproudoflionesses · 31/08/2022 21:28

SunshineClouds1 · 31/08/2022 20:28

Put a sign next to the intercom

I was going to suggest this

DecorateTheTree · 31/08/2022 21:31

Delivery driver phoned to tell me he was on the 7th floor and couldn’t find my floor (I’m 3rd) so would have to meet me on the ground floor - ticking idiot

10 floor block of flat with 4 flats on each floor!!!

bestbefore · 31/08/2022 21:31

I think you might need to speak to Royal Mail - I think they are responsible for registering and displaying addresses? Can they change it so it says flat number first not Road number? But def speak to the builders owners as well

buzzbuzzybuzz · 31/08/2022 21:31

qtpa2t · 31/08/2022 20:35

Sorry I must have not been very clear. I'm the one living in apartment 7B... everyone else lives on 7 Big Hippo Road, any other apartment, like 26C.so they will write first line of address is 7 B Hippo Road and then next line 26C, but drivers don't read next line and just deliver it to me to 7B. Hope that makes sense

That's worse than I had thought!!

abblie · 31/08/2022 21:40

Put signs up at intercoms or set daily reminders to put intercom on in mornings

qtpa2t · 31/08/2022 21:48

GretaVanFleet · 31/08/2022 20:56

I get your frustration but the delivery driver isn’t going to know you have two young children nor that it’s happened x number of times already that day or week. They have made a mistake that you acknowledge is easy to make. No one deserves to be abused doing their job. That aside do you like the person you become when this happens and is that how you want your DC to see you?

Yeah that's a really fair call-out. It's definitely not who I want to be. Not being mean to people for what is a small mistake in their long day. I'm honestly just going to turn intercom off and let my fiancé deal with all our deliveries if we miss them. I was very annoyed at this poor guy when he came to our door around midnight last night and he was so apologetic! Thats why I was writing this because I'm still thinking about his poor face 😩

OP posts:
qtpa2t · 31/08/2022 21:51

FitFat · 31/08/2022 21:17

Sorry to be dumb but I am confused about your address. Are you at like Flat 7, 7 Mill Lane and people just see 7 and assume you are the right address?
Anyway can see why its annoying, esp with small kids!!

Yeah in your example I would be 7M on 7 mill lane, where people write their street as "7 m lane" basically. You're literally skipping writing 3 letters, it's not that big a deal just write the whole thing😫😫

OP posts:
qtpa2t · 31/08/2022 21:53

Whatatimetobealivetoday · 31/08/2022 21:25

@qtpa2t i just wanted to say I am so sorry about your cat and I’m not surprised you need to vent having been through all that and having a newborn I really feel for you!!!!

Thank you <3 I'm still so sad. Maybe that's why this whole thing gets to me more, my whole emotional state is just not accommodating for things like this

OP posts:
unbreakbroken · 31/08/2022 21:58

I live at Flat 10, 7 Big Hippo Road, and I'm so sorry!

I always explicitly write on food delivery instructions "Ring number 10", and I make sure my parcels are addressed to "Flat 10, 7 Big Hippo Road", but occasionally a really dopey driver still tries to deliver to Flat 7, 7 Big Hippo Road anyway.

Most of our couriers are the same (e.g. Amazon) so we've trained most of them to stop pestering Flat 7 now.

malmi · 31/08/2022 22:05

Get the intercom to switch on and off on a timer so you don't have to remember each night/morning. You can get timers that work like plug timers but suitable for wiring in to an intercom system.

ItsABrandNewDay · 31/08/2022 22:46

I'm sorry OP, I can't think of much that would help, except a note to say to call the number on the drivers delivery note on arrival and mute your buzzer. That way, any parcels for you they would be able to call you, and any deliveries for the other address would call them. But notes aren't always read and may dissappear!

We have a slightly similar issue, our address is listed with the royal mail as (for example) 5 Bell Cottages, Book Lane, but there is also a 5 Book Lane. Its a completely separate postcode, but when places automatically fill out the address with the postcode and house number, it always reverts to 5 Book Lane. We even struggled to get the phone line connected when we moved in because no provider seemed able to find our address properly and struggled to understand that the two addresses are different! I really hope you find a suitable solution soon!

ThinkingForEveryone · 31/08/2022 23:02

Well I hope you never have to be a delivery driver OP....
It is an absolute pain in the arse trying to find people, do you have any idea how many homes don't even have a door number displayed? Or what it like trying to find someone in the dark when it's raining?
Hopefully you don't get one having a bad day that abuses you back (you would deserve it)
Just turn your bloody intercom off overnight, it's not rocket science and if it distresses you so much should be easy to remember.

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