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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to decline cervical screening offer?

549 replies

Teacupsandtoast · 30/08/2022 18:06

Just that really.

Is there a simple process for opting out or is there hoop jumping required? (Which often seems to be the case when it comes to withdrawing consent for anything)

OP posts:
LikeAStar1994 · 30/08/2022 20:05

Namechangehereandnow · 30/08/2022 19:01

Can’t understand at all why you want to decline … makes no sense 🤷‍♀️

Because we are grown ups and can make our own decisions regarding our own bodies? Nobody gets a say over my body apart from me.

Judgemental much?

Slopey · 30/08/2022 20:06

Unforgettablefire · 30/08/2022 19:36

I don't get this. I remember they'd swab your cervix and look for pre cancerous cells? Is it only hpv that causes these changes? What if you have cell changes and no hpv?

Yes I think the argument is that you are very unlikely to have the cell changes unless you test positive for HPV. Resources are better spent doing more checks on women who have tested positive (because if you do, you now go more often) than looking at cells of women who are HPV negative.

However I'm not going since they made the change. I really hate that they do this invasive, intimate test and then don't bother to look at the cells. I feel a bit disrespected TBH, I think they should offer women HPV swabs at home. I will do an HPV check at home instead of smears as long as they stay negative.

Just for balance, for anyone thinking of having their first smear, mine have never hurt the tiniest bit. I just don't like getting my kit off for something that'll just be binned.

Thereluctantgrownup · 30/08/2022 20:07

OP, are you just one of those people who like to be awkward and difficult for the sake of it? If you don't have the sense to go for what could be a potentially life saving 5 minute test, then just put the reminder letters in the bin and move on with your life 🙄

ReeseWitherfork · 30/08/2022 20:07

SaphiraBlue · 30/08/2022 20:03

I couldn’t pass without commenting….

I’ve read through your posts and have seen that you have given no specific reason as to why you no longer want smears, other than you wish to make the choice not to have them.

I was diagnosed with cervical cancer at the age of 29. Short story - I had 5% survival odds.

The hardest bit wasn’t being told I had cancer, it wasn’t the hell of waiting to find out how far it had spread. It wasn’t the treatment. It wasn’t faking everything was ok….

The hardest bit was watching my 5 year old son sleep and wondering if he was going to have to grow up without me. Nothing is scarier than imaging a life for my son without me there by his side, being there for him when he needed me. That is the most heart wrenching part of my whole experience. I went as far as buying birthday cards for every birthday up until his 21st. I bought a congratulations on passing your driving test - which I wrote him a lecture on not speeding, drink driving and being careful. I wrote him a card congratulating him on his engagement with a message to his future fiancé. I wrote him a message about loving and respecting his partner and how important trust is in a relationship. I wrote a card for the birth of his first child and telling him how I felt when I became his mum.

As part of ongoing treatment I have to see my oncologist who has to do an internal examination every time I see him - smear tests are a walk in the park compared to those.

I was devastated that I had to have a full hysterectomy as I wanted to have more children. So much so I was actually considering risking not having it so I could have another baby.

It took a mother from my son’s school to message me that her friend had just passed away from cervical cancer leaving 4 children without a mum and she couldn’t forgive herself for not mentioning it to me.

I was heartbroken, I was desperate for more children, but I already had a baby that I needed to put first - because as parents that’s what we should do- put our children first.

It’s your life, your choice… but what would your children choose? Would they want you to risk whether or not they grow up with you there?

Thanks to having a smear, despite having 5% survival, I’m now 6 years clear and my son turns 13 in a couple of weeks. That box of birthday cards remains in the attic.

That story was a rollercoaster of emotions. Thanks for sharing. I’m so glad to hear you’re clear now, and wish you everything that it stays that way 💐 I have a close family member with stage 4 cancer who has been given a short outcome and praying she is one of these medical miracle-ish cases. The more I hear the more hope I have.

XenoBitch · 30/08/2022 20:07

ReeseWitherfork · 30/08/2022 20:04

Knowing why kinda helps with answering the question though, no?

Not really. The only reason people want to know why is so they can say OP is wrong.
It is her body and her choice.

FMSucks · 30/08/2022 20:08

A friend of mine was found to have abnormal cells due to HPV last year. She’s had a biopsy and is under watch now.

She has also been sexually inactive for over a decade so for those saying they don’t need a smear as they are not sexually active, have the same partner for years etc it can lie dormant as it has done for my friend and become active later on.

ShhDoNotTell · 30/08/2022 20:09

XenoBitch · 30/08/2022 19:35

There was a thread about cervical screening a while back. One poster said that people who refuse the screening should be denied NHS treatment.
She then went on to say that her own sister had denied screening and had cervical cancer. It was bloody awful.
But this is MN where people come out with callous shit because they are hiding behind just an anonymous name and a screen.

There is a lot of NHS screening. Bowel cancer screening, mammograms, prostate, oral health (dentists look for signs of cancer), general 40+ checks, BP checks, blood tests etc...
I have never seen anyone called stupid or emotionally blackmailed for not going through any of the above... or told they should be denied treatment if they later develop cancer. It just seems to be unique to part of the female reproductive system. Why is that?

Very astute. Because of internalised misogyny. I think many of the comments on this thread are horrendous. Women policing other women about something which is completely personal and private, because then it makes them feel better about their own ‘choice.’

I say ‘choice’ because smear programmes like this one are just marketing campaigns, complete with guilt-trip adverts and slogans, and hiding the actual facts that would allow women to make informed decisions about their own bodies.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 30/08/2022 20:09

If you are happy to gamble with your life, don't go. But I would strongly encourage you to go.

ReeseWitherfork · 30/08/2022 20:09

XenoBitch · 30/08/2022 20:07

Not really. The only reason people want to know why is so they can say OP is wrong.
It is her body and her choice.

How can anyone possibly weigh up whether a decision is reasonable enough without knowing the factors of that decision?

Even “my body, my choice” comes with caveats.

jennakong · 30/08/2022 20:10

It's your choice. The wisdom of declining depends on whether you're sexually active or not, and if and when you were.

If you haven't had sex or v. intimate relationships for twenty years, your risk is going to be lesser. Not saying that HPV can't lie dormant in the body for a long time - I know it can - but sexual activity is the biggest risk factor, isn't it? It's vanishingly rare in women who are lifelong virgins or celibates.

Even if I had been celibate for a very long time but had children or dependents, I'd have screening regardless, but if not, I might be inclined to turn the offer down.

LikeAStar1994 · 30/08/2022 20:11

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at poster's request

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 30/08/2022 20:11

Sidge · 30/08/2022 20:04

@PinkSparklyPussyCat yes we don’t get informed of private smear test results. It’s worth taking a copy in for your surgery to be added to your record, and then it can be coded for the CSA so they won’t call you unnecessarily.

Generally speaking nothing you have done privately is copied in to your GP unless you specifically allow it or request it (depending on the nature of the private consultation. Some will ask if you want your GP informed).

Thanks Sidge. I think I gave them permission to share details of the possible ovarian cyst but was a bit taken aback when she offered to do the smear there and then and can't remember what I agreed to!

EnidSpyton · 30/08/2022 20:11

There is so much misinformation out there about cervical smears. A lot of women - most on this thread - are actually clueless about the purpose of a cervical smear, its necessity and the fact that for most women the risks outweigh the benefits. There are many doctors out there who have been calling for them to be stopped for years due to the unnecessary damage they do to many women due to the fact that abnormal cells are very common and in most cases revert to normal within a short time frame if left untreated - but the stress, anxiety and pain caused by further examinations causes mental and physical trauma to women that could have been avoided. If you're interested, do some research.

Cervical cancer is pretty much only caused by HPV (95% +). Therefore if you don't have HPV, you will be vanishingly unlikely to have cervical cancer.

The cells removed during a cervical smear are only actually examined IF the HPV test they do comes back positive. For the vast majority of women, who will test negative on the HPV test, the cells they've had removed during their smear will go straight in the bin.

What IS necessary is a HPV test, which can be self administered. If the HPV test is positive, then a follow up smear test can be arranged. In some boroughs, like mine, this is now the norm. I got sent a swab in the post and did it myself at home. Simple, easy, stress free. However, because women's health is stuck in the dark ages, most areas of the country are still enforcing smear tests, despite them being an unpleasantly invasive and often painful experience for most women - and entirely unnecessary for most, to boot.

For those women being dismissive, I have suffered from vaginismus for most of my adult life. The pain of a smear test is indescribable - literal agony. There are many women for whom invasive vaginal tests are painful or trauma inducing to the point where they will avoid them at all costs. Just because it's easy and painless for you, doesn't mean it is for everyone. Which is why the move to HPV self-smears can't come quickly enough.

Please, ladies, educate yourself on this and stop perpetuating the myth that all women 'need' a smear test every 3 years. We really, really don't.

Shortkiwi · 30/08/2022 20:12

My SIL has just had a hysterectomy for cervical cancer. No symptoms at all, only picked up on smear. Luckily she’s all clear now, no spread.

ememem84 · 30/08/2022 20:12

I’ve known 4 people have cervical cancer. Only one is still with us. I’m a huge believer in making sure I have my smears etc. I had abnormal results about 5 years ago and have had smears each year since and two colposcopy’s.

but I’m also acutely aware that it’s up to the person. One of the people who passed away has girls about my age. They won’t have smears. Which personally I think is crazy. But their bodies their choices.

my gp sends a letter with a form which notes that if you no longer want them just sign and they’ll stop reminding you.

Gemma987 · 30/08/2022 20:13

I didn’t go to my last appointment as was pregnant (not recommended when pregnant, hence not going). I then got a reminder recently which gave me the option to confirm I was opting out and the potential risk factors.

JaneBrowning · 30/08/2022 20:17

@ShhDoNotTell and @XenoBitch Cynical or what?

The screening that is offered to women is cervical screening.

Mammograms start at age 50 (some areas slightly earlier.)

Bowel screening is for the over-50s.

Prostate cancer testing for men is not routinely offered.

I think women ought to be grateful they have this on offer.
If they want to decline, that's their choice.

The younger generation will have had the HPV vaccine (IF they took it up- it's not mandatory.) It protects but not 100%.

Older women (early 30s) won't have nor will millions of women in their 40s-60s.

The argument against screening is usually over-diagnosis and unnecessary treatment. You can choose to be treated if your tests show anything untoward.
You can't choose if you never have a test.

FunnyTalks · 30/08/2022 20:18

FMSucks · 30/08/2022 20:08

A friend of mine was found to have abnormal cells due to HPV last year. She’s had a biopsy and is under watch now.

She has also been sexually inactive for over a decade so for those saying they don’t need a smear as they are not sexually active, have the same partner for years etc it can lie dormant as it has done for my friend and become active later on.

Yep a family member had a similar experience.

She didn't survive. It's why I drag myself to smear tests (they check visually too, it's not just the HPV test) despite past trauma making it very difficult.

dutysuite · 30/08/2022 20:18

I’ve had two letters about a smear but I can’t get ever get through to my GP surgery so haven’t been able to book one.

MySandwich · 30/08/2022 20:19

Will start by saying 'your body, your choice' in every circumstance, so not going to berate the OP or suggest anyone goes for a smear.

However, I have to echo some others who have said having had the HPV vaccine doesn't mean you won't have HPV. That's misinformation and potentially dangerous. I had my HPV vaccine at 14, delayed getting my first smear by a couple of years due to covid which came back positive for HPV. Fortunately, my cells came back normal and my yearly check up is coming up soon.

I'm aware that I'm very lucky and that if any cells do become abnormal they will hopefully be removed before becoming cancerous but it really isn't the case that HPV vaccine = no HPV

Folklore9074 · 30/08/2022 20:20

🙄

Teacupsandtoast · 30/08/2022 20:21

ShhDoNotTell · 30/08/2022 20:09

Very astute. Because of internalised misogyny. I think many of the comments on this thread are horrendous. Women policing other women about something which is completely personal and private, because then it makes them feel better about their own ‘choice.’

I say ‘choice’ because smear programmes like this one are just marketing campaigns, complete with guilt-trip adverts and slogans, and hiding the actual facts that would allow women to make informed decisions about their own bodies.

@ShhDoNotTell yes, yes and yes some more. Thank you

OP posts:
XenoBitch · 30/08/2022 20:23

JaneBrowning · 30/08/2022 20:17

@ShhDoNotTell and @XenoBitch Cynical or what?

The screening that is offered to women is cervical screening.

Mammograms start at age 50 (some areas slightly earlier.)

Bowel screening is for the over-50s.

Prostate cancer testing for men is not routinely offered.

I think women ought to be grateful they have this on offer.
If they want to decline, that's their choice.

The younger generation will have had the HPV vaccine (IF they took it up- it's not mandatory.) It protects but not 100%.

Older women (early 30s) won't have nor will millions of women in their 40s-60s.

The argument against screening is usually over-diagnosis and unnecessary treatment. You can choose to be treated if your tests show anything untoward.
You can't choose if you never have a test.

Not cynical. But show me where people are called stupid, emotionally blackmailed, or told horror stories for not getting screenings that are not cervical cancer.

I have never seen someone called an idiot for not going through bowel screening. I have never seen a load of stories of death shared when someone admits they have not been to the dentist in 15 years.

It is not being cynical to wonder why other women in particular are so invested in the reproductive health of others.... to the point of callousness and name calling.

LadyVictoriaSponge · 30/08/2022 20:24

ShhDoNotTell · 30/08/2022 20:09

Very astute. Because of internalised misogyny. I think many of the comments on this thread are horrendous. Women policing other women about something which is completely personal and private, because then it makes them feel better about their own ‘choice.’

I say ‘choice’ because smear programmes like this one are just marketing campaigns, complete with guilt-trip adverts and slogans, and hiding the actual facts that would allow women to make informed decisions about their own bodies.

Very well said by both of you.

FMSucks · 30/08/2022 20:25

@FunnyTalks I’m very sorry to hear about your family member xx