DH adventurous hobbies

[sukisoo82]

We are in our early 40's with 2 primary aged DC.

DH likes hi-octane hobbies (one of which he has just injured himself doing) but I'm at the 'knackered Mum who can't sleep properly and neither does one of my kids' stage.

He loves being on the go constantly which is great as at least he's fit and happy but I find it all quite hectic having 2 kids plus the worry of this accident as well. I realise that's where my body is atm. Or should he rein in the adrenaline seeking things a little now he has kids?

His way of relaxing is doing something extreme lol.

Do you have equal amounts of free time to do something you'd like to? Even if it's just go and relax somewhere child free!

If you are always looking after DC and never get a chance to do anything for you, then that's not really fair imo. If he's happy to be solo dad so you can go out and do things, but you don't want to that's different. I don't think you can police what he does in his free time, if you have equal free time.

Depends on so many things you can't really tell from your post. One person's 'high octane' is another person's mundane.

I have 3 'high octane' hobbies - I do one with DD, one with DS and the third one we all do together with DH too. They are expensive hobbies that take me away from home, but I love having a busy life. DH is hugely supportive and in turn I support him in his hobbies (which are mostly much more mundane, but which he loves.) With the exception of the time I split my tibia down the middle when DS was 10 months old, I have managed to mostly (touch wood!) keep myself intact.

Being a parent means you need to learn to evaluate which risks are worth taking and which are just stupid and unnecessary, but that's what you need to speak with your DH about, not whether he should stop his hobbies altogether. He should take into account his responsibilities as a parent and your needs too. But as we have seen on MN so many times, it's not just whether a hobby is hi-octane or not that is generally the issue, but whether your DH is being sensible and considerate about it. It is as possible for a bloke to be a time-consuming knob over something like his dad footie team as it is about climbing Everest. It's not the hobby that is the issue in these cases, its the man and his approach to it.

It is as possible for a bloke to be a time-consuming knob over something like his dad footie team as it is about climbing Everest. It's not the hobby that is the issue in these cases, its the man and his approach to it.

tbf more risk of death & injury in climbing Everest.

I wouldn't tolerate my DH base jumping or ice climbing etc if we had dc as I'd be too anxious.