When did you accept your ageing?

[Idliketothankyouforajobwelldone]

I did mean to use your instead of you're!
I know if is better than the inevitable for sure, however I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to look one's best.
If you've aged, do you ever miss the way you looked when you were younger? Or do you prefer it now? Did you stop caring about your appearance as much or did you embrace it?
I think it's definitely harder for some than others, and ageism is rife.
It's something that I'm trying to accept myself and not resorting to endless procedures to retain my face! I know looks aren't everything but it's human nature to want to look good.
I did have a bit of a turning point yesterday though, I met an elderly woman in a care home who genuinely still had a very beautiful face. Fantastic bone structure, skin still pretty firm despite being over 80, lovely eyes and cheekbones, she could have easily been a model when younger.

I'm not remotely interested in looking any younger than my age. (mid 40s). I've never understood the obsession with looking younger. I hate all that never ask a woman her age crap as if it's something to be ashamed of.
The way I've reacted to ageing is to be more focused on my health, lots of exercise, careful with how much I drink and trying to eat healthily. I want to be fit and active when I'm older.

Agree! health is the motivating factor with diet and exercise for me. Health is wealth!

I'm one of the ones who look younger than her age by a decade - that's because I'm pretty vain and have HRT and Botox, use make up, don't really put my face in the sun

However the people that say I look younger than 50's are all older than me and don't really look at my (now sagging) neck

As Norah Ephron says "you can't do anything about your neck"

Mine gives me away if people look closer

And I WISH I could do something about my health but unfortunately arthritis in almost everywhere means I can only walk (and not do any other exercise)

I am in mid-fifties and starting to feel achey and noticing that I take longer to recover from things. However, I wouldn't call myself old.

I think I accepted ageing (certainly appearance wise) when I decided to let my hair grow out grey. I was 53 and, although I wasn't dying my hair its natural dark brown anymore and had moved to a mid/light brown, I was fed up with the maintenance. I am very grey - have been for years under all the dye. And yes, I probably look older than I did, certainly on first impression, but my face didn't suddenly change! In fact I look better than I did in the sense that I look healthier. When I see photos of my 50 year old self with brown hair, I look pale and not quite 'right'. I realise lots of women aren't grey at my age and they look absolutely right for them - my auntie in her 70s still has natural dark brown hair with scattered greys - like me in my twenties😂 And plenty of women my age who dye their hair look great. I just didn't. I am very, very happy with how I look now at 55 - well, from the neck up anyway!! I'm still very agile, apart from sore feet when I've been sitting around too long. I normally run, but we are having renovations done, together with the kids being off school (they are young as I had them in my forties) and my routine is shot to hell. My diet is appalling and needs a lot of adjustment. I could do with losing at least a stone, more for health than appearance though.

It genuinely has never bothered me, perhaps I am lucky in that 'what people look like' really' doesn't interest me ... are people kind, interesting, generous with their time, leading fulfilled lives etc is so much more important to me. I don't mix with people who obsess over their looks or spend money on treatments etc. My DM is 90 ... does she care about her looks? No, she cares about her friends, her hobbies, her interests ... always looking for 'new' things to do with her time. She is off this week on a solo trip to explore the city she was evacuated to during WW2. Her zest for life is amazing.

Perhaps I am in denial but I have never noticed any ageism affecting the sort of life I choose to lead.

I've just realised I said dying rather than dyeing my hair😂😂

I’m going to get flamed for this but I think staying properly fit for me, daily running etc has massively helped with my ageing

I'm pretty fit, run a lot etc and I feel great for it, but I've noticed that my slightly overweight friends look so much more youthful in the face than me or our other slim friends.

Flowers you’ve been through the mill W0tnow. I’m glad you’re getting better.

Apologies I quoted the wrong person 😳

Late fifties, I pay lip service to accepting that various changes in my body are age related and will only get worse, but inside I'm totally in denial and get frustrated every time I learn all over again that I can't leap from one activity to another like I could in my 30s. DH seems much more at peace with not being able to do some of the things he used to do.

I'm not so deep into denial that I ignore advice about futureproofing my body. I'm highly motivated to minimise loss of muscle and bone mass and have made some lifestyle changes. Though even then I'm thinking of these as things every woman should start to do as she heads towards her late thirties 😃

Appearance has never been important to me. Being clean and tidyish and wearing clothes that don't fight with me or among themselves is ageless.

I'm in my late 50's. But don't feel old.

I go to the gym at least 5 times a week and dress pretty and certainly don't dress like an old middle aged lady.

I went to visit one of my closest friends this weekend, I hadn't seen her in flesh since lockdown and my god she look middle aged and frumpy. I've known her 50 years. She's obviously put on loads of weight and is "hiding"
It with these horrendous smock dresses.

She's lost her confidence I think, after the menopause. But I was genuinely shocked how old she looked. But it wasn't because of the wrinkles etc it was her demeanour and fashion.

I wear clothes that my teenagers steals and always laugh at some of the fashion and beauty threads on here. "Am I too old to wear XX at 32?"

Blimey wear what you like!

On them other hand I don't like my crepey skin, or aching joints but try my best to eat well and exercise a lot.

Age is a confidence thing I think.

I've accepted that I am aging, but I am fighting it, because I can see very well what happens to the human body if you don't. For me, it's really important to stay fit and active. When you're young, you can get away with not doing regular exercise and you can still look good, but once you get to your late 30s you really can't, because things start to sag as gravity takes hold and flesh loses its elasticity. I don't want to be a saggy, middle-aged woman hiding under a tent - the fear of that keeps me active.

I wouldn’t assume someone has “lost their confidence” because they’re wearing smock dresses or things they find comfy. It could actually be the reverse- that they don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks anymore! (That’s where I am). Of course it may be right to say that about your friend but I’d hate people to look at me and think that about me!

I am 41 and have chronic disabilities that have developed in the last 10 years and I’ve gone from being a size 8-10 to a size 20 due to over eating and medication. Im actually not really that bothered about it. I mean yeah I’d love to wake up and lose 4 stone overnight but I don’t want to make the effort to do so and I’m happy as I am, I accept that I’m not 25 anymore and my body isn’t what it was. Part of that for me is wearing comfortable stretchy clothes. I don’t want to wear stuff that isn’t loose round my
middle. I’ve done that my whole life - dressed up - and I’m done with it now. It doesn’t mean I don’t want to look reasonably okay but I will wear a smock dress, elasticated trousers, comfy baggy stuff. I just like it and find it comfy. It doesn’t mean I’ve lost my self or my confidence- quite the opposite I’m very content!

I’m 50

I look middle aged. I’m overweight and just something in the last year has changed I see it with friends too they just look different.

I need to shed some weight and get fitter but that is to be healthier.

I was gorgeous I absolutely knew it and now I’m not so attractive, Im glad I don’t have to put up with so much creepy attention. When I see young women I feel amused as I know the power they have I use to enjoy the attention and that I was able to wrap men around my little finger but there is so much more to life I wish understood this when I was younger but my looks were always what I was told was the best thing about me and that is sad

it’s really no big deal unless you put such an emphasis on how attractive others think you are I spent far too much time considering this. I’ve seen my mum become bitter about losing her looks so that has certainly helped put things into perspective.

I thought I'd got used to the idea - perimenopausal, growing out the greys, accepting the changes. The thing that bothers me more is I don't quite recognise this new face in the mirror these days. It's hard to explain, even to myself so I'm thinking out loud here. It's not especially wrinkles or getting old or standing to lose a few pounds (although of course it is). It's not a superficial thing to me, more existential. I think with pregnancy and ageing my face has completely changed over the years, and it is so strange.

Good points, @Afterfire - I hope you're feeling ok at the moment!

I genuinely always looked young for my age, and although not beautiful, was attractive, turned heads and got alot of attention. Just the way it was.
In my early forties, things started to slide! That seems to be a common age for it to happen from what Ive read on similar threads. Probably related to plunging hormones.
I read on here once that you can look good in your fifties, but you will still look 50. I think this is true.
Maybe surprisingly, I'm not bothered in the slightest. Just another phase in a life I'm very grateful to be living.
As the sunscreen song says, your body is the greatest instrument you will ever own. That doesn't stop as you get older.

I'm struggling with it in my 40s tbh - not so much looks (although the extra chin is unwelcome) but I have gained a stone out of nowhere and I am turning egg shaped. I have always had a decent figure with no effort at all, and I can see those days are gone .

I'm also thinking more about my parents ageing and seeing them have health problems, which brings home the harsh realities.

The only thing that bothers me about my age (40) is the fact that my eggs are now past it and so I’ll never have much wanted child(ren).

I have good plump skin and minimal wrinkles, only grey is a few eyebrow hairs. People seem genuinely surprised when I say my age. I am taking bucket loads of anti-oxidants and mitochondrial support for IVF/egg quality though, so that is probably helping (my skin at least, eggs are little improved). But infertility aside, age and death don’t scare me, I just want to do it well and with good humour if I can.

I agree.

There is a huge difference between accepting you're ungl

Blimey wear what you like!

Please reassure me @FatFucker that you can at least see the hypocrisy in that statement now that I've pointed it out to you, given what you said about your poor friend.

Bold fail, oops.

Arggghh hit sent too soon.

There is a huge difference between accepting you're ugly and accepting that the best years of your life are behind you.

I'm 42 and to me aging is accepting that I've probably already lived half my life. There is nothing about my face a bit of make up can't sort out. I'm not a cool teenager, but I was never cool as a teenager anyway.