Return party invites

[Itsmypartyillcryifiwantto]

Just venting really

daughter about to go into year two. Fair few parties over the last year, most of which were whole class parties in village hall type things, a few expensive activity ones which only all the girls or all the boys were invited to etc

Because of this, for our daughters sixth we invited all the girls in her class. She originally said there were a few she wasn’t bothered about inviting but when i explained about leaving people out etc she said it was fine. It shouldn’t be about the money, but it was a SUPER expensive party (not least because of how many girls we invited) and the girls were really spoiled.

Since then have found out two girls who came have since had parties where the vast majority of girls were invited and my daughter wasn’t. Their parents clearly don’t give two hoots about leaving people out - which to an extent I get (can’t have everyone etc) but to just leave out the kid who’s literally just invited you to theirs??

my daughters found out as her little bestie has been invited to both and the mum told me in all innocence presuming we’d been asked as it seems like everyone else has. Daughter is so upset 😭 no reason for leaving her out im aware of, not being naive, she’s a lovely kid

i really hate this playground politics stuff. Really not cut out for it. Last time I make that mistake and try to be nice and include those particular girls.

I had a similar thing the other week. DD went to her club which one of her bestie also goes too. She mentioned party to my dd who wasn't invited. Mine was fine about it but her bestie got upset with her mum later and cried about it as she felt sad my dd wasn't coming. I think it helps she has her brother and they have always had some parties where only one of them has been invited. When she had a party they had only just gone back to school who mix the classes every year so I just allowed her a certain number and she had a mix of both classes in her year so not all people were invited from her class.

Sometimes the kids may be desperate to do a particular activity, that is very restricted. One year my son wanted to do a very cool Lego Robot making party. The kids made and operated their robots using special kits and tablets, the lady who did it had 8 kits each containing enough equipment for 2 kids. That meant that we could not invite more than 16 kids. Other times a kid might want to do an expensive activity and the parents may only have the money for a small number of kids to do it. The bottom line is any parent wants their child to have a good party, not have to do something they don't want to do, or not have a party at all, in case they hurt some kid that they don't know that well.