Can anyone help?

[Adesperatemum]

For background, my 2 year old has been diagnosed with learning difficulties which span over all areas of his development, I am really struggling with his behaviour at present (biting/smacking especially other children/anyone within reach even in the supermarket 😪 )

His childminder was fully aware of the above prior to him starting with her in April, all has been OK except for once incident where he bit another child which I had assumed had been dealt with as have heard nothing further since.

Now my AIBU is I recieved a text message whilst at work today citing his behaviour has become far too challenging now and she cannot facilitate having him in her setting any more with immediate effect

Surely I should have been informed of when his behaviour has been challenging ?

I have contacted the paediatrician who has said no further input from them until he is of school age and I've spoken with the health visitor and even social services with my worries about his behaviour but no one seems to want to help

I'm really down and depressed with it all, what am I meant to do about working now I have no childcare ? I'm on annual leave this week and due in again the week after next

Sorry for rambling, I have an older DC and have never experienced this before , am also a single parent with no support in any way shape of form from his dad and my family refuse to help when I have asked so I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place

Shameless bump

Contact your Local Authority/Council, tomorrow (early years team or EHCP team). They will be able to help you find an SEN nursery and provide the top up funding he needs. It may take a while though, an Education Health Care Plan (EHCP) takes 20 weeks, but they maybe able to provide emergency funding in the mean time. Good luck

@1willgetthere thankyou!

@Adesperatemum Were the council any help?

“I have an older DC and have never experienced this before , am also a single parent with no support in any way shape of form from his dad and my family refuse to help when I have asked so I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.”

You seem to have a lot on your plate. Why won’t his dad step up? Is this the same dad to the older DC?

Excellent advise from @1willgetthere

I would also ring your childrens services centre and explain everything you've wrote here.
HV are very much either great or crap but you have to have atleast one there who will listen and help you.

Having a diagnosis you will be entitled to the two year funding also. This can be used in any setting.

@UWhatNow he has stated he wants no contact whatsoever (I could start a different thread on that topic) and the father of my eldest two sees them once a month if that🤦‍♀️

@1willgetthere yes , a very patient and understanding lady is due to ring me back on Wednesday

@SunshineClouds1 thankyou, yes I have one locally will give them a call, I'm happy to take any help/support/advice on board at the moment because I don't know how much more I can cope with, I am plastered in bruises currently from where he has been biting me and it bloody hurts!

Have a look at sensory chew necklaces.

I was in your position op, really sorry you're going through this, it's so hard!

I went through childminders like water, they'd all assure me they could cope and had strategies in place, but ended up handing their notices in.

In the end I got a lady who came to the house, so my dd was in her own setting, she'd be there before school and collect after school. She'd also cover holidays. It was expensive but meant I could continue to work. I paid more than I earnt on some months, but it was worth it, my dd got one to one care in her own home.

@TooHotToTangoToo that could work, I just need to sort my house out as I cannot take my eyes off him when we are home so I have housework tasks stacking up , fab idea tho! I feel like work helps my mental health and gives me a breather!

@SunshineClouds1 thankyou I will, that sounds like it could be very useful!

I second chew necklaces. Also look into this: www.gov.uk/help-with-childcare-costs/free-childcare-2-year-olds

Thankyou, he's just been awards the highest care component on DLA so I think he would be entitled to some free hours despite my earnings being above the threshold! Good to know!

I can't imagine what you're going through and send hugs Only bit of help I can offer's to look into the mobility part of PIP as he should be eligible and it's another £64.50 a week
Good luck xx