to be annoyed with my boyfriend

[beaniesteve]

because when I said I was going to get a full sexual health check-up at the doctors, he responded with "good, then we can see if it's your fault of mine".

We've only been trying to get pregnant since October (which is when I came off the pill) and now I think he is thinking that I must have some fertility problems because we've not got pregnant yet. I wasn't worrying and it annoys me to think that he has been even though it's only been a short time.

you might be being a it sensitive
he did after all say your fault or mine, so he has obviously thought it might be his fault

hope all goes well for you, such a stressful time xxx

I think you need to talk to him some more to adjust his expectations - it can take a few months (and more) for your cycle to return, and then become routine, so you know when you're ovulating. It's been such a short while, you were right not to be worrying yet. Maybe your boyfriend thinks he's got such supersperm you should have conceived immediately

posie -- I think the issue is that he assumes there's an "it" to be someone's "fault" at all. If beaniesteve only came off the pill in October she would be doing very well, statistically speaking, to be pregnant by January. Her boyfriend doesn't appear to grasp this...

YANBU but these situations can be quite sensitive. Is he the type of man who may genuinely not realise that what he said wasn't the most appropriate of responses?

Would echo what thefunkypea said as well, I think it takes the "average" (whatever that is!) couple at least 6 months to conceive, and you have only been trying 2-3 months.

Perhaps try and speak to him later and explain how this comment which may have been just a throwaway comment made you feel. Wishing you success very soon.

PortandLemon has hit it on the head. If we had been trying for a year or 2 years then maybe I feel like he might have more of a 'right' to think there may be a problem, but this early in the proceedings!!

thanks for your replies. I might get hold of some literature for blokes about getting pregnant and leave it round the house

it's nobody's "fault". I conceived 3 babies fairly quickly within 2 or 3 months of trying (or not trying at all in DS1's case!) but when we wanted to conceive again, it took a year. We obviously could do it, having done it before, but it's just one of those things

oh sorry got wrong end of the stick!!
I still think it's nice he is worried though and obviuosly is looking forward to extending your family.
Some blokes just don't give a shite.

Hiya Posie... yeah, I feel very lucky to have found someone who actively wants to start a family. Wish I had found him sooner.