To be dismayed and furious

[PatienceHeatherstone]

that there is no understanding or support of learning disability even within the disability community, let alone in society as a whole.

So much anger and hurt from wheelchair users if they feel they are being ‘talked down to’ because ‘my legs might not work but my mind does!’ So if your mind doesn’t ‘work’ is it ok for people to be rude to you? So many crummy inadequate services offered to folks with CP and we are invited to agree that it’s disgraceful that they are not better - but no services at all are offered if your difficulty fastening buttons might be exacerbated by your IQ.

I’d make a slight caveat that if you have a specific learning difficulty such as dyslexia but are otherwise ‘smart’, you are more welcome, but really that’s a different category anyway.

There is no realistic inclusion or progress possible when this one group of people with learning disabilities is still considered to be obviously and legitimately other.

Your wheelchair example isn’t great. Literally no one who has ever said anything to that effect means that it’s ok to talk down to the learning disabled.

And arguably the minds of the learning disabled do still work.

You cannot possibly know what they meant @Ducksinthebath, but it certainly doesn’t sound great and the implication is clear- ‘they talk down to me as if I were mentally disabled, how insulting!’

But of course, if you have a non-offensive version of what that sort of complaint might mean, please do tell me.

Or take Francesca Martinez, the self-described ‘wobbly’ comedian. She had her bit about better, more accurate, names for physical disabilities eg ‘wobbly’ instead of ‘CP’. She gave a long list of proposed changes and finished with ‘instead of saying Katie Price, let’s just call it retarded.’ Wow. It certainly got a big laugh. There’s a way to make sure everyone knows the contempt you all have for people with learning disabilities. Especially low to aim your contempt at the mother of a man with learning disabilities, as well. I certainly wouldn’t be able to look to her for solidarity in her advocacy of disability rights.

You mean learning disability or physical disability or both? Its better than it was and there is more support if you go looking & are assertive. Online is the best source. I was surprised my teacher neighbour a few years back was so uninformed on the support & opportunities available for their child with MH & learning disability issues. She seemed to have detached & given up tbh. As a result her teen was missing out on stuff that would give her both support & life , work & social skills. Its rough, I could see how much hard work their child was but giving up had if anything, made things worse.

@CSIblonde absolutely true, there is much more support and inclusion than 30 or 40 years ago, certainly if you have a physical disability. No one now would suggest that the child who can’t walk should stay in the special school with the children who can’t read or talk.

Ok, we’ll as a physically disabled person who has said something to that effect, I can vouch for what I mean. And what I mean has never ever been that it is ok to behave poorly towards people with a learning disability.

Then could you tell me what you did mean @Ducksinthebath ? Why bring up the comparison at all?

And, asking sincerely, did you ever when you said it wonder how it would sound if someone with a learning disability, or their close friends and family, overheard you say it?

Good friends of mine have said it in front of me and I can only assume obliviousness on their part. But it still hurts like hell to hear it.

The meaning is clear and you’re being deliberately obtuse, looking for offence where none is meant.

No. It’s quite easy to say ‘I can hear you’ or ‘I understand you’ or even ‘Don’t patronise me’ without resorting to any sort of comparison if you cared about others.