To think C section is the best birth option?

[LilacSky95]

I've had 3 vaginal births and 1 c section. The recovery from the vaginal births was a breeze, but I've been left with a host of issues from those that will last a lifetime.

My c section recovery was harder, but after the initial pain etc were off I was ok, and it was so nice to be intact 'down there' afterwards.

AIBU to think surely it's better to risk any of the problems that can arrise from having a section, over all the awful things that women often have to deal with for a lifetime after vaginal birth?

Yes I know c section is major surgery, but loads of women end up needing surgery to correct the damage done by vaginal birth too, and even then will never be the same again. At least your problems that come with a c section will be sorted out at least 12 months after delivery, and tour vagina is unscathed.

I've already had one lot of surgery to try and fix my prolapses, and will need more surgery in the future. I cant help feel jaded that if I'd had c sections I wouldn't have to go through all of this so maybe my views are skewed. What do you think?

I don’t think your mum’s arrogant @Frida9, her experience is valid. Your sister’s been very unlucky.

I feel in the minority, but I had a cesarean for my first (breech) with a terrible painful recovery. No medical issues at all except numbness 3 years on, I'm just low pain tolerance apparently. The recovery was truly horrific for me, quite damaging mentally.

I decided very last minute to have a vbac for my second this year - got a precipitous labour with shoulder dystocia, 2nd degree tear only. This second recovery was an absolute doddle in comparison, a little soreness, but I was up as usual same day and no longer term pain. No zombie walks, playing with my 3 year old as normal next day when we were allowed home (baby was resuscitated so they kept us in overnight to be safe).

I would vbac any day of the week before doing another cesarean now (except for medical need ofc). But you can never know how it will be until you've already done it.

No, knowing my mum she is arrogant. She was lucky and I'm built like her so I'm hoping I'll be lucky too but basically telling your daughter's that they will have failed if they don't try a VB is arrogant.

her mother is arrogant. Being positive about her experiences is fair enough but calling c-sections wimpy is awful.

also I suppose frida sister is unlucky but what has happened to her isn’t that extreme or unsual. Lots of women have failed inductions, forceps and haemorrhages with ongoing damage.

Gawd, another anxiety-revving thread. MN is so in love with them. It doesn't help women to hear a heap of scare stories about how they give birth. There are challenges & hazards however a pregnancy ends. No zero-risk option.

sorry, it's not my intention to scare women or fear monger. However isn't this attitude part of the problem? We can't keep lying to pregnant women/women who plan on having children at some point and tell them all will be fine, when actually chances are it won't be. Os it not better to tell the truth and inform women of what could potentially happen to them so they don't go in blind like a lot of us did? I agree there's no need to unnecessarily scare anyone, but I don't think that's what's being done here at all. Many women on this thread have said they have had a lovely positive experience, with both CS and VB.

I was quite frightened of baby getting stuck and deprived of oxygen too. This happened to a friend of mine and her baby ended up with brain damage. It terrified me that a totally healthy baby could be so badly injured during birth, although I know that must be quite rare.

There's just so much to it all that it's such an individual decision.

I think it all depends. You could have a vbac and it all go well or you could have c section and all go well or you could have a terrible experience with either. If you have had a terrible experience with one then your going to want to do the other. My first birth was an emcs I was 42 weeks and was induced and was in labour for so long but in end had to have an emergency as baby was losing their heartbeat. The whole thing was traumatic I was put under GA as was so stressed and panicked I was only 17. I stayed in hospital a week and yes it was tough. I've opted for elcs this time at 39 weeks as doctor told me about risks involved like original c section wound bursting open etc and I also didn't want to end up with an emergency again. My baby is breech also so elcs is best choice. I'm so scared I won't lie but either way has to be done.

I’m 4 weeks on from an emergency c-section (after a traumatic failed 4 day induction) and honestly the recovery has been brutal.

I’ve never felt more helpless & vulnerable than the first morning after the op, when I was delirious with pain & my husband had to help me out of bed on the ward, to shower me, put me into giant incontinence knickers and dress me.

I had a dural puncture from the epidural which led to the most horrific ice pick headache which was only relieved when I lay down completely flat. Not ideal when caring for a newborn. It took two attempts at a blood patch op & several days in hospital to fix it.

I then caught Covid from being in the hospital (the Covid cough in FUN when you are post c-section as it’s like your insides will all fall out).

I’m now battling an infected incision too and have been on drugs for weeks that aren’t compatible with breastfeeding, so we’ve ended up having to ditch breastfeeding altogether pro tem (I’m pumping in the meantime to try & keep supply up).

Honestly, the birth & subsequent recovery has been so dreadful that I can’t countenance ever having a second child.

C-Sections aren't always plain sailing they can go very, very, very wrong. My anaesthetic during an emergency section didn't work. I wouldn't wish that experience on anyone ever.

2 uncomplicated VBs, no post birth issues, home the same day.

2nd DC was breech at 37. I educated myself about ECV, ECS, breech VB. The training and experience of health professionals around you is a HUGE factor in outcomes. Its shocking that womens health is not treated as important as it should be so outcomes can be better.

@UncomfortableBadger that sounds like an awful experience!

So does yours @LadyFuHao 😱

I don't know anyone in real life who has had complications with their CS, this thread has definitely opened my eyes. Obviously it's anecdotal, but it's easy to fall into the mindset of CS = better when the only women you know who had one, including yourself, had great straightforward experiences. Sorry to all of you ladies who had difficult births and recoveries x

Had a vb first one and elective c section after. Would never do a vb again!! Too many friends have ended up having forceps or emergency c sections and suffered damage. No thanks. Took less than ten mins for baby to arrive and after less than 2 weeks I was fine. Scar is fine too.

I think there's a whole culture around childbirth which is causing more issues than needed for women. When I was giving birth the first time, I strongly wanted to sit upright while labouring but I was forced to lie on my back as that was more convenient to the midwife, who by the way, was delivering two babies at the same time. I had a long, complicated labour ultimately ending in c-section. With my second labour I was allowed to labour upright and I had a successful VBAC. I really wish they had listened to what I wanted the first time round.

im sorry for pp who have had bad experiences

Trigger Alert .
Both of my two now grown up children born by emergency section
Baby number 1 long labour with no dilatation.After my membranes ruptured he went not transverse lie as his head was high and unengaged.Both of us nearly died during the section due to the GA used.He had Apgar of I took 4 minutes to breathe.I was very ill for 2 days after.My son is now 52 and has a form of autism caused by his birth I still have flash backs and nightmares.
Baby number 2 again long labour with no dilation, high unengaged head.As my uterus was showing signs of beginning to rupture I had another emergency section under GA.Baby brought out of my opened up uterus with forceps as his head was stuck. Apgar of 3 but responded like his brother.No after effects.Now a 50 year old.
I had tubal tie done as was told no sections.It was only after this second birth when the experts discovered and accepted I was unable to give birth vaginally so should of had elective sections.As this was 52 ad 50 years ago things were not different to what they are now.No one was allowed to ask for a caesarean birth if you did then your sanity was questioned.
These days I would have been spared all that and had two planned sectiions
My apologies for scaring anyone, but there is another side to caesarean births

So sorry to hear that @nildesparandum. Absolutely awful

Sorry for some obvious typos.Writing this still brings back memories.
Not no sections. meant to say no more sections
not different meant to sayalot different

This. The best option for you based on your past experience is a CS. The best option for me based on my past experience is a VB. Neither of us are wrong - I hate these sort of posts though as they normally turn into a slanging match.

YABU, so unreasonable.

DS is 15mo and I'm back at the doctors again tomorrow because of pain in my c section. I have never been able to wear clothes that touch it, have to be seemless over the belly button granny pants. Can't even wear lace. Now it's more painful and I'm getting what looks like stretch marks parallel to it, like my skin is tearing around it.
Vaginal birth wasn't an option, DS is safe but my god I hate that bastard scar.

One of each. CS was a much easier recovery.

I was "managed" into my ebac when I spontaneously (for the second time) laboured. DD2 was only delivered naturally due to being vaguely prem at 36 weeks and 5lbs. Forceps were still required, vaginal monitoring, level 2 tears. We were both pretty badly beaten up. My birth notes from DD1 clearly indicated issues around "space" but the delivery team stalled and stalled me for about 6hrs. We came really close to an Emcs and were at the hospital 8 hrs ahead of actual delivery with a pre booked elcs.

So whatever you decide, prepared to be very pushy

How?? I couldn't even wear maternity jeans for weeks after my c section and it was elective. And I went shopping a week later and nearly passed out in Next.

The risks, complications, pain, trauma and long term impact of vaginal births are minimised, and the disadvantages of sections over played imo. Women are being conned into believing the cheapest option is the best one.

@5128gap that's what I thought tbh

Both mine were emergency sections ( the first was a very long labour, pushing and failed forceps). I literally bounced back. Up and dressed within 6 hours, walking alone to Nicu within 24 hours. No pain relief post theatre because I missed all the drug runs because I was in Nicu. Didn't think about asking because I wasn't in pain.

Second was exactly the same. Didn't hurt. Back in my jeans within a fortnight, walking 3 miles a day to take dc1 to preschool with the pram. I have a tiny thin white scar, no numbness at all and no pain or complications.

However despite that, I'd still opt for an uncomplicated vaginal birth if I could choose.