To find this an odd response?

[UndertheCedartree]

I've invited a few of my DD's friends to do an activity next week. It's obviously something my DD would like to do and all the parent's of the DC accepted except one. She responded saying her DC doesn't like to do that activity and could they do something else (particular thing named.)

I didn't really know what to say to start with. Surely, if her DC doesn't want to do the activity then you decline? And if her DC wants to do a different activity you organise that yourself?

I replied saying it was a shame she didn't want to join us but maybe we could do that activity next time. Was that a reasonable response?

Yes u you our response was reasonable and that parent is a cheeky cow. If she wants her DD to do that activity she should bring them all to it!

She sounds mental and your response was fine

Yes that’s a good response. Nothing too committed and if you don’t want to organise it then kick it into the long grass. I just don’t understand some people. What a cheek!

Your response was fine. It just seems like she didn't realize that you had already planned this activity with others attending.

Sounds like she thought you wanted to get the kids together 1:1 which makes her response a bit more understandable.

I think it depends how your 'invite' was worded

She may have read it as a suggestion for a get together rather than a firm invitation for something you have already arranged

Agree her response is odd if your invite was clearly the latter

All depends on how you phrased it, maybe she read it as something else. Don't give it any more headspace.

Was the invitation clear it was a group thing? Its possible she thought it was just an invite for her daughter, and then the response may be more reasonable - for example 'My DD doesn't like swimming, could they go to the park instead?'

I really don’t think the OP was “frothing” at all over this.

OP your reply was perfect. Not at all unreasonable.

I don't know, possibly she's just (very clumsily) trying to make sure her daughter is included in a group activity? Tone and context is everything.

I'm not frothing, just checking my understanding of the situation and that my response was reasonable. I'm autistic so find social stuff quite hard and always second guess myself.

Ah, I see. I think I did make it clear and that others were attending, but will remember that for future.

Your response was perfect. If she'd like to do another activity she can plan it with the group, but you shouldn't have to change your plans to fit her DD. She probably didn't understand the situation herself so no harm done

That's where I struggle - tone and context! I don't think her response was worded rudely but I just thought it was a bit much to expect me to change the activity that all the DC wanted to do because of one child. I felt that if her DC wanted to do that activity then she could organise it.

Weird as feck from her OP. Your response was perfect.

Perfect response OP and lovely of you to take them!

I have a friend who is like this with her children. Quite anxious about everything to do with their children's development and has massive FOMO if her child doesn't want to do something so tries to steer us to do what she and her DD want to do. You responded perfectly by the way! If you're organising you and your DC should do the activity you want to do.

Oh, thank you, that's kind.

Thanks all! Glad my reply was ok!