Hi everyone!
Firstly, I apologise for posting in here as I know it is not an Aibu but the bereavement posts don't get alot of responses at times and I am looking for people who have had similar experiences and what helped.
My Dad passed away 2 weeks ago after a long illness. It really was a long, slow, painful death. However, his deterioration was rapid. We were told he had up to a few months and he died within 2 weeks The deterioration in him was scary.
As a family we nursed him and comforted him.
In the hours before he died, I sat with him, nursed him and planned to fall asleep next to him. I couldn't sleep so I went to another room around 4am to try sleep. (I dont live there, was staying over) Without giving to much detail I was there when he was found in the morning. I was devasted that I had left him, although thankful at same time that I didn't awake to him dead next to me.
It has been devastating and 2 weeks have passed and we still have not been able to see him in Chapel of rest nor have the funeral although this is all happening with the next week. (Delays where I live)
I am finding that I am having the most awful, disturbing dreams all about death and dying. Sometimes it me people are trying to kill, sometimes it's people being killed in front of me. I am wakening up most nights, shaking my partner awake asking him if my Dad is sleeping or dead. I am still half sleeping when doing this but I remember it in the morning. This is happening most nights. Has anyone had experience with this? When do these awful dreams stop? Is there anything that helped?
So as not to drip feed, I do have a previous history of nightmares/night terrors which subsided around 2 years ago.
I'm getting to the point where I don't want to sleep/dreading sleeping because the dreams are so disturbing.
Anyone else with experience of these types of dreams after a death? Are these dreams normal after a death? Is there a way to make them stop?