Neighbour's party

zb2019 · 13/08/2022 20:34

They could be having family round or a certain set of friends YABU

PollyRockets · 13/08/2022 20:36

Why would they invite you?

are you friends?

TheMagicPudding · 13/08/2022 20:36

I think it depends entirely on who is being invited and what occasion. I had a get together last year with work friends so it would be very odd for everyone if I had invited a neighbour...
I wouldn't feel at all offended at not being invited to a neighbours party

Patsy400 · 13/08/2022 20:36

My neighbours are the last people I’d invite to a party lol

Seriously though, it entirely depends on the circumstances. Is it a birthday party for just family or close friends? Are you particularly good friends?

StoneofDestiny · 13/08/2022 20:40

I'd invite mine to a 'party', but not to a family get together.

Original poster

asparalite · 13/08/2022 20:45

Yes obviously lots of reasons why they're having a party, but generally when it's family work colleagues etc you wouldn't go to the trouble of telling neighbours. Just think it would have been polite to have told us face to face.

OP posts:

PollyRockets · 13/08/2022 20:47

asparalite · 13/08/2022 20:45

Yes obviously lots of reasons why they're having a party, but generally when it's family work colleagues etc you wouldn't go to the trouble of telling neighbours. Just think it would have been polite to have told us face to face.

Ah, you're those neighbours

Can see why they didn't invite you

Halfarsedjingler · 13/08/2022 20:47

We had a party recently with a big group of friends who haven't all been together in years and are coming to terms with a bereavement in the group. No way was I inviting my neighbours even though we are good friends with both sides.

Marasme · 13/08/2022 20:49

not sure - depends on whether you are friends or not.

my street neighbours are having a wee bbq at the mo, we can hear the whole conversations, and are feeling a bit left out, especially when we ve offering to host several times and neither of them are ever available.

But eh - each to their own.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 13/08/2022 20:50

YABU, and very odd. They're being courteous to give you forewarning so you can plan around the noise if need be, and a note is perfectly acceptable.
It's very strange your first thought is why haven't they invited you, are your parties a free for all of acquaintances/neighbours who will hear it?

sunshineamongsttheshitstorm · 13/08/2022 20:50

They sound like pleasant, considerate neighbours seeing as they've let you know in advance it could be noisy.

You sound like a narcissist neighbour - why the hell would they be inviting you???? 😂 are you okay? Why do people I.e YOU make everything about yourself. Why just because they are next door does it warrant you an invite to THEIR a party.

Get a life.

girlmom21 · 13/08/2022 20:52

asparalite · 13/08/2022 20:45

Yes obviously lots of reasons why they're having a party, but generally when it's family work colleagues etc you wouldn't go to the trouble of telling neighbours. Just think it would have been polite to have told us face to face.

They probably didn't invite you face to face because they knew you'd be angling for an invite

Stupidbonfire · 13/08/2022 20:57

I had a one off big party last month. I invited a couple of neighbours. But the other I don’t know other than to give a cheery hello too. So the ones I saw I gave advance warning to verbally, and then popped a note through the doors of the others, telling them about party, and what time I planned to bring it indoors and turn music right down etc. apologised in advance and thanked them for understanding. And reassured it wouldn’t be a regular thing.
i know at least one of them works shifts and one has small children so it seemed only polite. the ones I’ve seen since thanked me for the heads up and wished me a happy time ☺️
we all have to live near each other and share communal space, so keeping on the right side of people helps.

ChickenBurgers · 13/08/2022 21:06

Literally have absolutely zero desire to invite my neighbours to any kind of gathering or party I may host. They sent you a note to let you know about the noise, I have no idea why you feel they needed to tell you face to face nor why you think you should have an invite. Odd behaviour.

InTheFridge · 13/08/2022 21:12

YABVVU

I've only ever had one loud party at my house (for my 40th) I informed neighbours by note.

Wouldn't invite them unless they were good friends.

Livelovebehappy · 13/08/2022 21:22

I think it’s rude having a party so loud that you have to warn the neighbours. The only time people should have loud late parties at home is if they live in the middle of nowhere. Otherwise, show consideration and book it at a venue.

Lifeisrelentless · 13/08/2022 21:37

If just be grateful they pre warned me, my neighbours didn’t! Don’t know why they’d invite you?

LimboLass · 13/08/2022 21:45

You sound high maintenance neighbours.

I would prefer a note TBH. Saves the hassle of opening the door.

Stupidbonfire · 14/08/2022 22:18

@Livelovebehappy a venue can be costly. And if you have a large garden which you’ve spent a lot of time and effort on, it’s nice to entertain at home. And sometimes you can’t get childcare and would like to put children to bed or make sure they have somewhere quiet to have some downtime.
And a lot of venues have a cut off time of midnight. So many reasons it’s nice to host at home.

Wafflesnsniffles · 14/08/2022 22:31

I think they sound like fantastic neighbours - really considerate of them to let you know they would be having a party.
Bizarre that you are miffed at not being invited. Would you invite them to a party you were hosting?

bloodyunicorns · 14/08/2022 22:36

Oh op, you sound a bit entitled and rude here. They let you know in advance. Does it matter that they let you know via a note, not a visit?? No!

Sims400 · 14/08/2022 22:38

I think you’re being unreasonable about an invite but I never understand this concept of a note telling your neighbour to basically deal with the noise and gives them a free pass.

crackersforcrackers · 14/08/2022 23:32

YABU I don't think neighbours are entitled to an invitation.

InquiringMinds · 14/08/2022 23:44

asparalite · 13/08/2022 20:33

Had a note through the letterbox from next door neighbour telling us they're having a party and could be noise; are they not pretty unfriendly neighbours not inviting us?

@asparalite you are lucky you got a letter! Our neighbours held a catered for party with a live band and ongoing evening barbecue. No note to any of us in the street!

As for your neighbours not inviting you, perhaps it was just close friends and family.

sundayvibeswig22 · 14/08/2022 23:54

I would assume it's a 'big' party to celebrate something specific and likely to be louder and later than typical. I'd appreciate the heads up.

My dsis had a small wedding reception in her garden (due to getting fed up with 2 years of cancellations due to covid). She sent a note to all neighbours explaining the situation with a bottle of nice wine and explained music would be over by 11 and everyone gone by midnight. There were no complaints and all neighbours congratulated them that day and after the wedding. Tbf she did say if any of them wanted to call in for a beer/ cocktail/ wine (there was a catered bar) they were welcome but nobody came.