Neighbour issues

[Hedgehogdetective]

New to mumsnet and will try to be vague so it’s not identifiable.

im currently pregnant and we’ve had issues with our neighbour for years. We are owners and she rents from the council. She has 5 children but they don’t all live with her (think one of her daughters was recently removed from the home too). When we moved in she had parties everyday. We got a letter from the council within a week of moving in saying there’s been complaints about her and if we heard anything to contact them. The partying didn’t stop so we reported her and she got a warning.

we got on well with her but then during the night there would be regular noise that would wake me up and my mental health started to suffer. We would message her about the noise (eg loud music at half past midnight) but she was never apologetic and always made up excuses.

we kept reporting her to the council but they said we needed corroboration but we are semi detached so doubt the other houses can hear internal noise. She obviously realised we had been complaining and got a family member to come to our door to intimidate us. We phoned the police and she had a group of friends around and they all lied and said they were witnesses and that her family member didn’t do anything. The police said we had no evidence. I was distraught and suicidal because I felt scared to leave the house and that no one was helping us.

the current situation is that the noise has been okay, but recently she went on holiday and left her dog uncared for for 4-5 days. The dog barked non stop and all night so we phoned the sspca. They came out and our neighbour returned from holiday within about an hour. We also saw a dead rat in her back garden so reported this to the council.

of course she wasn’t happy we phoned to complain about her so the next day had a massive party (weekday) with her friends drunk and loud music. She was also complaining about us to a neighbour because in her mind she can’t believe we complained about her. The neighbour told her she was wrong to have left the dog.

so basically I’m not sure where we go from here. I’m pregnant and the tension and issues are stressing me out. We can’t move and don’t want to move as we have spent money making this house our home. But this woman does not care at all about anyone and thinks we’re bad people for complaining.

It sounds horrendous. It won't change or improve until one of you moves unfortunately.

She is utter trash to have done that to her dog. You did the right thing. She cannot do anything to hurt you. Do you really want to be friendly with somebody like that anyway x

The depressing thing is that “We got a letter from the council within a week of moving in saying there’s been complaints about her and if we heard anything to contact them.”

I thought it was a legal requirement to declare a neighbour dispute upon sale? Surely some of those complaints came from the previous owner?

feel awful for you because perhaps at this point you had legitimate recourse to go back to the solicitors

although I may be also very wrong here

Even if she went you might get someone worse. Detached is the way to go, but even then you can get problems.

Yes when we viewed the house we asked how the neighbours were and the previous owners lied and said they were quiet. They had complained to the council and the reason they were moving was because of her. I contacted our solicitor and asked why we weren’t told of any disputes and the replies I got were “don’t know what you’re talking about”. It’s probably been too long now for us to do anything :(

I could have wrote this post myself except the noise is my neighbours shouting and screaming all day long

Yeah we definitely want nothing to do with her but I felt like I was losing my mind because she genuinely thinks we are the problem for complaining about her, she seems to have the mentality of “my dog barking 24/7 shouldn’t bother anyone”. She has adhd and is a hoarder so she clearly has problems but we think she is unable to see things from other peoples point of view or empathise. She thinks nothing is her problem or responsibility. I feel crazy cos I’ll get thoughts like “well maybe we are being unreasonable complaining about being woken up every night” 🥴🥴

The council will never move her because she has destroyed the house and garden. They won’t give her another house to wreck. They came out and cleared everything from her garden (it was like a tip filled with stuff) and she had started a food waste thing where she got the yellow sticker food from the shops and kept it in her garden as she was meant to redistribute it via an app but instead the food was left to rot and the council got several complaints about rats etc but it took them over a year to do anything about it.

We had neighbours from utter hell too.
3 yrs we had to put up with them.
so many SS reports ( DC thankfully all removed but after 2.5yrs!!!) tge disturbances and mess was disgusting, rat infestiations, dogs barking.
The police were involved almost wekly amd SS daily at one point.
It severely effected my mental health too.

Record everything-does your council have the noise app? If not, get it anyway.
Email the housing officer for council everytime

What did the rspca do about the dog and how long did it take them to come out after you range them ?

She still has the dog so looks like nothing. They came out after about an hour. The woman sat in her van for a bit and the dog was barking in the house the whole time. We were told she got statements from neighbours and she was “really angry” but she hasn’t taken the dog off her so….

I don’t think social work are that bothered, when we were friendly with her she told me things like “my son tried to stab his sister”. All her kids have issues. None of the dads are involved. She clearly can’t cope with all these kids but she still decided to have another baby and she has multiple pets.

So the council are appeasing her, at your expense. Disgraceful.

Are you living next door to Katie Price? 😅

Also another neighbour complained about her before we moved in and they told us that her family member also shouts abuse at them in the street, but always with a group of people around (so they can lie if she reports it to the police). This person is an elderly woman as well. She doesn’t say or do anything when she shouts abuse at her because she knows she’s the type to assault you without hesitation. Also this family member lives in the same street…

Yeah she damaged the shared fence in the garden and when I contacted the council about it they said I should replace the fence and take 100% responsibility for it because of our neighbours “lifestyle”. When I complained about this because why should I pay 100% of a cost when it should be 50/50 I was told “oh by lifestyle the housing officer meant she is too poor to afford to pay”. Even though our neighbour has hot tubs, multiple caravans and other stuff in her garden (but doesn’t work, pretty sure she breeds her dog to sell the puppies)

She knows how to play the system. Sickening.

I feel so sorry for you OP...I have the horrible neighbour as well, put up with them for nearly 8 y/rs now.
I have so many horror stories about them but short, every single day without a fail, they do either BBQ or put the outside oven on which emits smoke horrendously. We have to shut all windows&doors for hours under this heatwave.

I have contacted all sorts of authorities inc. the police for their weed party, but none of them could help us.

The thing is my tw neighbour is the same as your b neighbour, they think they have every right what they can do - they dont give a sh** how they actually ruin other people's life - mentally and physically.

I had put my house up on the market and had counted the day of moving but unfortunately, the chain has collapsed so we have gone back to square.
Luckily I have another buyer so hopefully moving out from the hell soon.

I hope the b neighbour is moving away but I hope you put yourself and coming baby first, neighbour issues must not take lightly.

I'd make plans to move. I don't think this will ever get better for you unless one of your leaves.

Well she won't be rehoused anyway if she is evicted and intentionally homeless.

I would go down the route of telling the council I was going to take legal action for the tort of nuisance based on constant and prolonged excessive disturbance. I would threaten to sue them directly. that could spring them into action. They can evict her and she will have to be homeless, she sounds like an utter piece of filth.

I would also threaten to call environmental health. Basically cause problems for the council so they pull their finger out.

I know it sounds stubborn but we really don’t see why we should have to leave the house we love because of her. Although it is basically our only option. We will have to declare a dispute and our house value will take a hit. I don’t think we will find another house as big as this and with such a big garden (and think she has the exact same as us but pays £0 as she is on full housing benefit, which I am not judging but surely if you don’t work and have a roof over your head you would be grateful and behave..)

Sorry to hear about your experience, and no surprises that no one helped. Sounds crazy but I actually wonder if these types of people are sleeping with someone in the police or something cos they seem to be able to do whatever they want!

Biggest cop out is to keep nuisance as a tort, rather than a crime. Look at how police won't come out anymore for loud parties, unless there is a public disorder

Trashy people like that is what gives council tenants a bad name!
I feel for you OP but like others have said I really can't see it getting better.