To ask guests to remove bed sheets on last day of stay?

[Moobear22]

DH family stay over from time to time.
they never remove sheets.
we work full time. Who do they think removes the bed sheets?
to be fair to them, whenever I have stayed at PIL house they insist we leave the beds without stripping sheets when we go.
i don’t have time for excess housework and was always taught to strip bedsheets as a guest.
how do I ask politely for them to strip bed? I want to be welcoming and not rude.

As a guest, I ask. Sometimes they say yes please, other times not. We stayed at our friends just this weekend, and they said "oh, no, we haven't got anywhere to put them, so I'll strip it later and out then straight in the machine ".

YABU to expect them to, especially as you haven't said anything. All it takes is a "would you mind stripping the bed? Leave the stuff on the floor/in the hall/wherever "

They don’t expect you to do it at their place so obviously for them it’s not polite to ask a guest to do it. So I’d reciprocate and take care of the sheets when they visit. Otherwise you risk them feeling unwelcome. To be honest I find it off putting when someone expects me to clean their house when I’m a guest. It makes me feel like they don’t really want me there.

We’ve gone from five minutes to 60 seconds to 30 seconds. Please can someone go and strip a bed to confirm the timing, for science? Not me, I hate making them again. Someone else do it. Maybe OP.

It’s a hard one. We have always led extremely busy lives and the ‘helpful’ people who strip beds just create chaos in our household. It means there are sheets/bedding sitting around in the laundry for weeks potentially before we can fit in an additional load of washing (already do 2 minimum a day as standard). I’d MUCH rather guests left them on the bed so we can strip at leisure when washing an extra load is convenient. People who strip cause me to do the voodoo doll thing when they leave😁.

I can’t imagine being annoyed about this, especially since you haven’t even asked them.

I once did strip a bed my DC had slept on at someone’s and the duvet was incredibly badly stained so I put the cover back on so they didn’t know I’d seen it, wasn’t sure what the right thing to do would have been.

Ask them or just don’t have guests. Dealing with linen is one of the easiest things about having people overnight.

Then you should take that up with him.

Expecting house guests to strip the bed is very odd. YABU.

Exactly the same. Two small kids, I don’t always have the capacity for running a load of sheets that same day so I’d rather people left them or at least asked. I do usually ask as a guest if it makes sense to.

The only exception here is MIL’s, who we stay at regularly - she’s getting on a bit and I just do it automatically before we go as I know she finds getting around the beds a struggle now. She has a big enough house to stash them if she doesn’t fancy doing a sheets wash though 😁

We’ve gone from five minutes to 60 seconds to 30 seconds.

To put the bedding on I think could take up to 5 minutes depending on the bedding - definitely not 5 minutes to take it off, how? Maybe if you’re Mr Bean, getting tangled up in the sheets…
60 seconds if you’re working at leisure.
I reckon definitely 30 at normal speed.

YABU. It takes literally two minutes tops to strip a bed. I wouldn't inconvenience my guests for the sake of such a quick task unless I was physically compromised ie. broken limb! It's rude to expect guests to essentially do housework for you, even if they've inadvertently 'created' it themselves (like asking them to wash their own dirty plates). It's part of being a host!

I'd find it rude if someone did strip the bed.

Then I'd be left with a messy bed.

If left made it can be done, when convenient, with other sheets. I wouldn't use one load just for one set of bed sheets. Is that what you do? Or do you change all your bedding every night??

I always just ask if my host wants me to strip beds. If I have guests I don't ask them. If they ask me it depends on what's up in my life whether I say yes or no. No big deal.

5 mins is the outlier - my fault for not wanting to write double digits and a whole word...

Ask them, I don't think it is a huge or awkward ask.

I've never stripped a bed after staying with friends or family and neither have any guests of mine - I would think this a really rude and weird request. Literally never heard of anyone ever doing this or being asked to.

I just leave them on for the next guests.

JOKE

Seriously, it takes 2 minutes to strip the bed. I prefer my guests, of which there seems to be a constant flow, to leave the beds to me, but if they strip the beds then great, if not, meh. Now if I could be as relaxed about guests making themselves toast and leaving the crumbs everywhere when we are prone to mice…

Thank you for the perspective everyone! I didn’t realise I was such an outlier!!

I don't generally strip beds as a guest but would if asked.

In your case, your DH needs to strip the beds or ask his family too. You say he takes forever to get round to it, but just tell him you want to start washing the linen through immediately so could he please go and do it now rather than leaving it as could he do it sometime?

I've never stripped the sheets from a bed as a guest. I've never been asked. I wouldn't bat an eyelid if I was asked.

how do I ask politely for them to strip bed?

"Can you strip the sheets from the bed on your last day please? Thanks!"

I don't get what's difficult about finding those words or stripping the sheets yourself

Who do they think removes the bed sheets?

Well there is the nub of the problem. You're cross because you know it'll be you. Every time. Never your DH. Why's that?

I leave the sheets on anyway after guests, protects the bed and means the cat doesn't get fluff all over the mattress and duvet etc. Then before guests come I strip, wash and replace.

I have never stripped a bed as a guest and it has also not something that has ever occurred to me. Nor do I expect guests to strip beds, to me that would be akin to asking them to run round with the vacuum or clean the loo before they go.

I have to say I think this is the main issue. Either you and your husband take turns, or he cleans up for and after his own family.

Guests are guests, they only stay for a short while and by and large their behaviour doesn't phase me unless it's deliberately or grossly inconsiderate (which not changing bedsheets isn't).

Dh's family, Dh's job. You have a DH problem, not a sheet problem as the MN saying goes ..

I hate it when guests strip the bed! Our spare room could do with a new mattress, it looks tatty.

No way to treat a guest. You can ask them if you want but be aware they will remember it as weird forever and judge you for being so uptight.