AIBU pulling out of Hen do?

[peoplepleaser17]

It is my friends hen do this weekend, we're friends but not particularly close as in we don't talk frequently; we occasionally message but don't talk on the phone. Her hen do was organised a while back, originally I couldn't go due to another long standing commitment so pulled out, but I managed to rearrange this so agreed to go for one night as I have another commitment on the first night still. Now it is this weekend I have realised it is completely unrealistic for me to get there as it is a 5 hour drive one way so I will miss some activities and probably not be able to enjoy the night out! When booking it I'd checked trains & planes which were fine but in the last month they have all been cancelled due to strikes. Is it unreasonable to pull out now due to travel nightmare? I don't expect anyone to refund me, they can keep the money for drinks as we'd previously discussed, but driving 4.5 hours for a night out (not to mention cost of fuel) just seems silly. If it was my hen do I'd actually be completely understanding, considering I couldn't make it originally anyway, but not sure if she'll feel the same?!

It would depend on the numbers attending - if there’s a big group then definitely no issue with pulling out. If you now not going makes it a really small group then as the bride I’d be upset by that.

I think your reasoning is entirely logical but in my 20s I once to NY for a birthday party on a Saturday night. So I think if you really really wanted to go you'd find a way.

You're right, if I was desperate to go I would just do it.
But it is a large group with a lot of people much closer to the bride than me, so I kind of feel like a filler friend and am thinking should I be putting myself out if I'm not even going to be missed?

Tbh as long as you're not financially inconveniencing anyone else and as it's a large party (so you're absence won't be obvious) then I think it's fine.