To start TTC now?

[Mushroo]

I was planning on TTC at the end of this year, but thoughts of a recession / higher prices have made me stop and pause.

We are lucky that we earn quite well, but I’m the higher earner so mat leave will be tight, and once I’m back at work, we were ear marking current savings for nursery. However, looking at rising gas prices it’s going to be tight!

would this be enough to make you delay? I can only earn more if I get a new job, and obviously
that would then delay things….

OTOH there’s never a perfect time, and we do have savings / parental support.

Help! (I’m 31)

You never know how long it’ll take so I’d start saving everything you can and crack on if you’re both equally on board.

I'd start now if you want a baby. When we conceived DC2 in autumn 2019 noone could have predicted the situation when baby was born in June 2020. Babies are born during recessions, wars, pandemics, these are things you have no control over. You also have no idea if it'll take you 2 weeks or 2 years to get pregnant.

Thank you - I think I need to cut down on listening to Jeremy Vine.

my heart is saying go for it but my head is definitely worrying…

Don't wait if you really want a child, time is ticking, and the time may never be perfect.

Have you looked in detail at your outgoings compared to your income when you are on maternity pay? Can you afford it or do you need to have savings to cover the shortfall? Particularly once SMP kicks in or the unpaid months.

If you want it just go for it. If it turns out you need ivf or something you'll kick yourself for stalling for years because you were worried about the gas bill.

There will always be reasons not to, when DC is here you’ll make it work financially

In your shoes I think I’d wait a few years and save as much as possible. We had DC1 when I was nearly 36. It worked perfectly, as I was senior at work, we could buy what we wanted and I ended up taking 3.5 years off work and then could get back in easily due to my experience.

Im currently thinking of taking 10 months mat leave, which would be 6 months paid, 3 months SMP and one month unpaid.

The SMP / one month unpaid would be savings. My DH might take a month unpaid leave in month 11 as he earns less than me.

Im happy enough (ish) with mat leave, its
the after.

No nurseries locally publish fees, but I think we’d need nursery 3 days a week, which would essentially wipe out what we’re currently
saving each month (without the gas increases!).

Im sort of hoping we’ll be going out, drinking less and no big holidays which can bridge the gap a bit… but we’ve always been pretty comfortable so the idea of not saving much each month is scary.

I'd just start now - you never know how long it's going to take! Not trying to scare you but it took my friend four years to have her eldest whereas for me it was first time lucky.

Nurseries my way cost about £40-45 a day. It depends on your area of course but say 3 days at £45 would be £585 a month. Then you'll get tax free childcare so -20% would be £487.50.

OP if it makes you feel any better, after two years TTC, our first is arriving in October just as the cost of living sky rockets and our mortgage comes up for renewal. I have accepted things will be exceptionally tight for us but I don't regret this baby so close to the recession one bit, and neither will you.

I disagree with waiting several years. I know 4 couples with unexplained infertility who are going through or have gone through IVF. If you have the basics in the place and are saving hard then don’t wait too long to start TTC.

Get cracking!!! There is never going to be a 'right' time. Of course there is a bad time but you seem to have all your affairs in order so the only thing you need to do is just do it. You have the family support and savings. You've got a good career by the sound of things.

Thank you everyone, you’ve made me feel a bit better about it all.

The tax free childcare especially, I knew it existed but the very simply calculation laid out really helps. Does anyone know rough nursery costs in South Manchester?

OP I'm in South Manchester (Trafford) and going rate for nurseries round here is more like £60-65 per day. Our youngest is in 3.5 days with no free hours and we pay around £700 per month after the 20% tax free reduction.

In the past year, we've gone through 3 rounds of IVF...unsuccessfully. We are about to start another round abroad, this time fully self-funded.
We had DS when I was 33 and had started ttc when I was 28. We've ttc number 2 from when DS was 18 months ...he's now nearly 6 years old.
No, I wouldn't wait. You never know how long it's going to take. (That said, my sister conceived both of hers in the first month of trying.)
There will always be something coming up. There's always a promotion that might get missed, an opportunity you cannot take up. Thing is, though, life doesn't just stop, it just changes. Most of the time, the opportunities will come up again. If they don't, then there's usually something else worthwhile.
It would have been great to conceive straight away. However, I also appreciate being an older mum. We don't really have to worry about jobs at this point. If this round works, I can take up to 2 years of paid maternity leave and would still have a job to go to when I return, even if I chose to go back part time. I work for an employer that covers up to 70% of nursery or school fees and covers DS's wraparound care in full. No way would we have had these benefits when I was younger and still worked in the public sector.

Don’t wait.

Don’t wait, I was 31 when we started TTC and it took 3 years to conceive DD, DS was a different story and we conceived in the second month of trying but you never know. If you’re the higher earner have you considered shared parental leave? You could take the 6 months then your DH the next however many.

Was 32 when we started trying. 10 years later and we’re 15k down on ivf. I do have two kids tho to show for it, so it’s not all bad 😁

Thank you all (and @Flowermarket for the helpful info :) ) you’ve reassured me there’s never a right time really, and we are in an ‘ok’ position.

id hate to not start now and we run into problems then lose a few months savings, so I guess that answers it!