To go alone?

[HuffleWoof]

On Wednesday we're meant to be going on holiday to a beautiful hotel. Gorgeous location, amazing bathroom etc. it's somewhere we always said we'd love to go.

I booked it for DHs birthday (next weekend), it's been on the fridge, in our shared calendar and I've told him about 5 times to sort out annual leave. He knows we're going away.

He's a (legal aid ) solicitor and he's now got a very important trial that's gone in his work diary starting Wednesday.

He could get a barrister to do it but he told his client who has mental health issues that he would be doing it personally (he's really good) he told me tonight and I said he could get the train to the hotel place then and meet me there as i need the car to drop the kids at my parents.

This is our first time away from both kids (1&4)

He's really put out I'm planning on driving down alone now instead of waiting for him. My view is it's a 5 hour drive and he knew the plan well in advance, his view is we should forfeit the first night because of his very important 1 day trial and just accept the fact we're paying for a night we won't using.

YANBU don't waste the money he knew the dates

YABU it's a romantic holiday away we should do it together?

I should go. A 5 hour drive with an audiobook or sole control over what music is playing and no little ones to stress over is a very different kettle of fish to a 5 hour drive with the kids. A night in a fancy hotel without the kids would've sounded pretty heavenly to me when mine were that small I think.

I'd be planning a really long bath and maybe sleeping sideways in the bed. Have a book to read during dinner. Maybe treat yourself to one of those adult colouring books. Have a chat before bedtime, and sleep the sleep of the finally off duty.

@howdoesatoastermaketoast yes! That's why I want to do it! Drive down and stop where I fancy not where the nappy change dictates, listen to an audio book have a bloody long bath and then sleep until I wake up

Fuck it I'm doing it

I'd choose what you'd like to do! There's no right or wrong in this case. If you'd like to go alone, it's OK. It also sounds like it would be less disruptive for your parents, to have the children arrive when they expected them, and if the older child can tell days and knows the plan, less disruptive for him/her too.

YANBU Why should you miss out on one night in a beautiful hotel because he is working? He can catch a train and meet you there. It’s a reasonable compromise as you do need the car to transport the kids.

And it’s still a romantic getaway, he’s just meeting you later.

Have a wonderful time 🏖🥂

Do it! Why should you miss out. You married the man not the work (although he seems to have)

Enjoy yourself and have a lovely time