Not paying for childcare this autumn as bills go up

[Essenceandvibes]

I've just had an epiphany.....I absolutely won't be paying a penny for childcare this autumn as bills increase and I won't be made to feel guilty about it either. I can work from home and watch my baby and pick up my 10 year old from school without the assistance of anyone else and if my employer has an issue with it, he can pay an extra £2000 per month post tax to cover the cost of full time help.

Our bills are going to be about £800 a month just electricity and gas alone for our detached 4 bed house, this isn't even thinking about the increase of petrol or groceries.

The mortgage has also gone up a few hundred quid too....childcare and commuting is now a luxury not necessity and I really hope every parent joins me in asking for employers like it or lump it

Shameful the government have let everything get this far, the knock on effects will be huge

You'll be doing a poor job at work and a poor job at parenting, it's just not possible to do both well at the same time IMO.

You have a contract to fore fill with your employer which I am sure if WFH and looking after a baby you will be breaking as the fours you are contracted to work you should be fully available to them not looking after your own child. So as others said be prepared to be sacked.

Employer does not have to pay for your child care at all as how is this fair on those who have no child care costs?

Sorry but like all its either suck up the extra costs or look for a job you can do when DC dad available to look after dc.

I understand completely OP, our nursery has increased their fees by 10%, our energy bills have shot through the roof, food prices have increased as has the cost of seemingly everything else.

I've never seen my husband so worried before.

Neither of us have received pay rises, my husband is actively looking for a second job but he already works full time.

This country is broken and everyone seems to care more about the billionaires and their profits rather than the employees.

Of course they won't, employers won't stand for it.

decent parents won't either because it's child neglect.

Crack on, let your colleagues pick up the slack as your playing with your baby.

But then this is wind up isn’t it, no sensible adult would think this is ok.

Can’t explain how many people are doing this and getting away with it at my place - problem is the work DOESNT go away and normally others end up picking up the slack as it is impossible to WFH full time and do childcare. I understand wanting to stick it to businesses but ultimately your (equally poorly paid) often end up suffering.

If every parent did it....they wouldn't get rid of us all

Is the baby's dad doing it too then?

OMG have you been talking to the employees at one if my sites!

They are utterly convinced to that it is somehow the leadership teams fault that costs have gone up. Oh and we are all millionaires (I bloody wish).

The fact is many businesses are really struggling at the moment, we haven't been in profit for two years yet kept everyone employed during covid and beyond.

It is not our job to fix every single social problem we have enough on our plates recovering from the last two and a bit years.

Best check your workplace policies. I work in local government and it is policy that you cannot look after under 12s permanently at home whilst you work.

I imagine you’ll get a capability or disciplinary

Your poor children

Agree with picking up your ten year old and letting them be bored whilst you work, but your baby's needs will be neglected if you are trying to work whilst looking after them. Briefly considered it with my preschooler but instead we will be working compressed hours so that he is never in someone's care whilst they are working as I believe this would be neglect if we were to do this regularly. It's ok as a one off if child is unwell or childcare setting closed but it is the chronicity of failing to meet their needs that would class it as neglect. And I really don't believe needs will be met whilst working.

It's not 'the hop' that's deluded.

Noooo! It just adds to the argument for employers to prefer to hire men than women, as childcare always seems to be the woman’s problem.

Our bills are going to be about £800 a month just electricity and gas alone for our detached 4 bed house, this isn't even thinking about the increase of petrol or groceries.

Surely your electricity and gas bills are going to be higher than most because you WFH.

That’s one of the good things about not WFH.
The majority of the week I am not in all day, so the only thing left on all day is the fridge freezer.

You’ll be sacked and the job given to a childfree person and then you’ll complain companies don’t support working parents

Very likely, yes

Unfortunately I know of too many employers who are now doing everything they can to avoid hiring women with children. Nobody suggests this is ideal or even right, but sadly it was always going to come with the sheer level of entitlement that's been building up

I know someone who had their toddler in nursery every morning, he then had a long nap after lunch and then some telly time, that did seem to broadly work for his mum to WFH - though it is reliant on the nap being rock solid and obviously is only going to work until the kid drops their nap

There’s a flaw in your plan OP - it’s not parents who would do this; it’s women.

How different would the last two years have been if every politician, judge and bin man had gone to work with a baby on his shoulder, and a toddler underfoot?

The female workforce has been hit hard by the pandemic, and we’re not even talking about it.

I agree we need action. We should be on the streets. Or we should organise a single day where women don’t spend a penny so that the financial markets feel the effect of our economic presence - just a ripple but .

Don’t do this to yourself, or your dc. Use that anger and energy to agitate but if you’re going to shoot something, don’t let it be your own foot, ok?

Picking your older child up from school is fine - a 10 year old can play/watch a bit of TV till dinner. But it's never going to work with you watching a baby while you work. Your employer could probably look at dismissal for this.

'Not pay the nanny'

well that's going to help everyone isn't it.
you don't sound bright enough to actually get paid to do a job, let alone be a parent...

@Essenceandvibes

Would you be cool with me joining you and abandoning my patients at work? I work for the NHS but... since commuting and childcare are a luxury, and all.... would you be happy to support me making that choice? And if your family member happens to be an inpatient on my ward who is now receiving substandard care due to the ward now being understaffed? You're still happy for me to join you? 🤔

Your OP seems unreasonably aggressive towards your employer. In a very childish manner you seem to think if you can give them an ultimatum they somehow must dance to your tune. I hope i'm wrong but someone with that kind of attitude is usually at the head of any queue should any redundancies be in the pipeline......

Sorry meant to say I will be working part time and my partner on compressed hours. Appreciate this may not work for ops family set up but doesn't take away that her baby will likely be neglected.

I had a similar manager who did this 2-3 days a week - I think it was ok when the baby slept, but as he got older she got less work done, so surprise surprise, she got him into nursery and now goes into the office more!

OP, I'm with you. I get the concern on this thread, but what else can we realistically do? Starve/freeze to death?!

I'm going to suggest you take a look at dontpay.uk, though I don't actually suggest you cancel any direct debits. The protest and talk about it should hopefully prompt some higher conversations/action. But it is something to consider.

I’d go with you have plenty of money as DH has a well paid job. Not one person who had serious concerns about money would risk losing their earnings to make a stand. It’s nonsense. You’re probably minted and are annoyed to have more expenditure coming out of your flexible income.