Not paying for childcare this autumn as bills go up

[Essenceandvibes]

I've just had an epiphany.....I absolutely won't be paying a penny for childcare this autumn as bills increase and I won't be made to feel guilty about it either. I can work from home and watch my baby and pick up my 10 year old from school without the assistance of anyone else and if my employer has an issue with it, he can pay an extra £2000 per month post tax to cover the cost of full time help.

Our bills are going to be about £800 a month just electricity and gas alone for our detached 4 bed house, this isn't even thinking about the increase of petrol or groceries.

The mortgage has also gone up a few hundred quid too....childcare and commuting is now a luxury not necessity and I really hope every parent joins me in asking for employers like it or lump it

Shameful the government have let everything get this far, the knock on effects will be huge

Classic divisive tactics on this thread “you’re a them not an us” actually 99% of us are us, the middle class are getting just as shafted as anyone else, doctors and teachers are with us.

”I don’t disagree with the points made but OP has a bad tone” attack the argument not the person or you’ve already lost.

You're on the wind up.

if my employer has an issue with it, he can pay an extra £2000 per month post tax to cover the cost of full time help.

Hahahaha! Or they will just sack you.

Yes sorry meant to mention that too
No idea why she thinks it is

It is funny how some people cannot see beyond their lifestyle.
They come here to look down at those who have to spend more than two hours a day to do their work and need a childcare.
The next lot will be those who do not need to work at all, have nannies for each child and do not care how much they pay for electricity and gas. They will tell here what loosers the rest of us here are.

Wtf is this thread 😂

Having had to try and work with a 1yo and 3yo during the pandemic and quite frankly having had some near misses there is nothing that could persuade me working at home with a 1yo is a good idea.

Will be glad when our nursery bill are over? Absolutely. However, I am happy to pay for qualified staff to make sure my child is stimulated and safe while I can concentrate on my job. I do believe though there should be more government subsidy as more and more women will be forced out of the labour market re childcare costs if something isn’t done.

I’m not disagreeing with your plan but you might want to check your maths. 2 children for 2 sessions a week at £10 a session per child doesn’t add to anywhere near £360 a month.

The notion that human beings all deserve to live in large detached houses with plenty of leisure time, masses of possessions and far too much food/waste, represents a mere blip in our existence as a species. It's about 60 years (at most) in the worlds richest handful of countries.

The long term far more sustainable reality is likely to be that we need to revert to more modest ways of living. Smaller, cooler homes. Fewer possessions and more reuse & recycling. More of our leisure time spent productively - allotments, knitting/sewing, basic carpentry, baking & cooking.
More cycling & walking.

This is how human beings lived, happily, in the vast majority of the world, for thousands of years.

Simpler lives. We consume too much of everything. It will probably take a long time for us to accept this as a reality.

I work in a national body of the NHS and we are all mostly based from home/sometimes have to travel to London or a regional office. As such we are incredibly flexible for everyone. However, in recent months I've had to discipline two members of staff - both parents of young children, for royally taking the piss.
One did what the OP is proposing and wfh with her toddler very obviously around and about during meetings. Some of which were about patient complaints and one particularly horrendous example was when her toddler interrupted a patient engagement meeting consisting of bereaved parents of young children. She has now been moved into another team and had ruined her chances of promotion.

The other took advantage of the fact that we promote very flexible working to miss important meetings where she was expected to take minutes because they clashed with school drop off or pick up or whatever else her child had on that day that was more important than her actual job. She decided to "delegate" her minute taking to a more junior member of staff who was not experienced enough to produce adequate minutes. She has now been told that she has to work from one of our offices and her line manager (who we also had a chat with because he should have noticed and stepped in before it got to that point) is closely monitoring her hours.

OP thinks parenting is a protected characteristic and she’s the one telling us to engage our brains? 🧠 😂

@NotMyselfWithoutCoffee

An accurate description of the thread, wtf indeed 😂

Ha yeh good luck on this one

You won't be able to WFH and mind a baby at the same time. Either your child suffers or your work will not be up to standard. Boss and managers had to cut people some slack during COVID but they are no longer willing to do this.
The reality now is that a lot of employers costs are going up and they can and will look at their bottom line. If they decide to make people redundant they could look at people who are not working to the standard expected. If they know your WFH and minding a baby it could put you on their short list. If your answering calls or try to have meetings on zoom ect you can't expect a baby to stay quiet/sleep and when your baby becomes a toddler it worse.

They could also manage you out of your job with the above also. They could tell you that you can't mind your baby and WFH at the same time. If your current childcare is a nanny you need to look for a cheaper alternative.

The reality for the majority of people at the moment is that the cost of living has gone up and wages are not going up as much. My feeling is that you had a nice life up to now with more disposable income than most. So now it time to budget, sell of things you no longer need, stop buying expensive items ect. Read up on money matters here and look at Martin Lewis website regarding budgeting and how to save money or get better deals. Shop in Aldi or lidi rather than in M&s or Waitrose.

I would also tell you that refusing to pay a gas or electric bill is a bad idea because if effects your credit rating if they are not paid. You should be able to contact your supplier with a meter reading and just pay for what you have used that month or 2 months rather than a DD of X amount per month. Just be aware if you do what I say your bill amounts will vary and will be higher in winter.

You know kids are infrastructure too right and parenting is a protected characteristic under the 2010 Equality Act?

What?!

😂😂😂

The irony is painful.

“The long term far more sustainable reality is likely to be that we need to revert to more modest ways of living. Smaller, cooler homes. Fewer possessions and more reuse & recycling. More of our leisure time spent productively - allotments, knitting/sewing, basic carpentry, baking & cooking. More cycling & walking.”

@InChocolateWeTrust That sounds lovely. Saves the planet and we would have time for leisure?! Sure beats my 50 hour work weeks in a boxy new build 4 bed detached while trying to raise 2 responsible children outside of work hours. Communal living, less roads and traffic, more fresh air. Sign me up.

I'm willing to bet OP is someone working for Don't Pay campaign who's been told to go on MN to raise awareness and get more people on board. I'm going to respectfully suggest they've done the opposite with this thread...

OP. You can't blame your employer for your straitened circumstances. Here in the UK, we have NMW. Your employer has to pay you NMW.

If you are worth more to a company or government, you will earn more than NMW. It's a combination of the skills and attributes you possess and supply and demand. That's how the labour market works.

Stop feeling resentful at your employer for the money they pay you. They pay you what you are worth. If you disagree get a better paid job or start your own business. Your employer pays you to work for them for a certain number of hours, so just do what they are paying you for and stop trying to skive on the job.

@lancsgirl85

Painfully funny 😂

More of our leisure time spent productively - allotments, knitting/sewing, basic carpentry, baking & cooking.

I wouldn't spend my leisure time doing any of those things, but good for you

I remember @Notyourtypicalvirgo from the thread about people refusing to return to the office so that they could carry out childcare - they told me repeatedly that they knew my workplace better than me, that I was a misogynist for wanting my colleagues to work their contracted hours rather than being paid the same as me to be playing with their kids for hours, and that MN should be a safe space for mums, free from the pesky opinions of us clueless infertile not-mums. Not remotely surprised she’s now turning her hand to pisstaking herself.

I work from home with a baby and it's great. Genuinely fine. And work absolutely fine with a toddler too

I agree in principle OP, however you will struggle to WFH with a young child (from experience).

It is sad to see so many people laughing at someone not wanting to pay extortionate childcare bills. As someone who can afford them, they are ridiculous. I know of a lot of people who either don't work due to the cost, or work simply to pay nursery bills. Yes the staff are qualified, but you don't really think the extortionate amounts are going to them? Early years workers are abysmally underpaid. A nursery manager where I am will earn around £30,000 at the top end of the scale. I was earning more when I got my first junior leadership role (which wasn't even officially classed as managerial and had a lot, lot less stress and responsibility).

What do you do, may I ask?

NMW no longer provides enough for people to live well... Not being from the UK (but having lived here a very long time), people do just put up with it more. We pay staff at the bottom of the pay scale the national living wage, but I think even that is struggling to keep up with inflation.