Would you want to know? Should I tell her?

[ifoundthebread]

I worked with a man i'll call him "M" and he used to tell his colleagues lots of things about his girlfriend, ( I'll call her "GF") it was all horrible stuff - she never did anything around the house, used him as a slave, used to take other men to the house to have sex with while he was at work, if he was at home she would demand he sleep on the sofa so she and another man could have the bed. Really made out she was a slut who had different men all the time, treat him like shit and he only stayed with her because she had no where else to go. GF has now started working for the same company, should I tell her whats been said because I know alot of people have already judged her based on what "M" has said in the past.

I know people go to work and vent about their other halves, not many go to work and constantly sing praises but some of the things he has said has made her out to be a complete bitch.

Would you want to know if you were her? For all I know it could be true could be made up. Just dont know what to do.

I'd want to know

Are they still together?

No I wouldn't tell her unless she was a friend / I owed her loyalty for whatever reason

Not sure I'd get involved in this right now. However, what he's done is really questionable and unprofessional. I know people vent about partners but that degree of it really raises alarm bells for me about him. Maybe see how things pan out. If people are treating her badly it might be worth a trip to HR.

If a woman told you she was being abused, would your first response be to tell her husband what she was saying?

No I wouldn’t tell her. You have no idea whether any of it is true for starters. I imagine the fall-out would be dramatic for everyone concerned and I wouldn’t want any part in the drama.

If you know her really well tell her. I'm guessing you don't. Frankly if you don't she won't thank you for getting involved and you'll end up looking like you're telling tales out of school. Also you don't know the dynamics of the relationship at all.

It sounds unpleasant and she does have a right to know if he's slagging her off to colleagues but you're not the right person to deliver this message. Do you have mutual friends?

I would keep out of this.

Absolutely not. It might be true, how will you phrase the question “do you have sex men other than your partner?” in a workplace environment.