To ask for advice from people with divorced parents?

[PrettyPollysParrot]

I’m getting divorced. STBXH had been emotionally abusive and controlling and I have had support from Women’s Aid.

Child arrangements are still being sorted, but he is likely to get 50-50 or something approaching that.

He refuses to communicate with me other than by text and still makes my life difficult by being uncooperative and critical of me and my parenting.

What I’m looking for is advice from anyone who was once in the position my kids are in. What can I do to help them? How can I minimise the impact of this situation on them now and in the future?

I’m not looking for any criticism of the decision to divorce. It took me a long time to leave because my self-worth was so low, but I think it is the right decision because I don’t want my DC to think it’s ok to behave how their dad has.

I also know it would be much better for the DC if we could be amicable, but I can’t change their dad, so I’m looking for advice on things I can do.

I feel a bit helpless so any advice would be much appreciated!

Google grey rock and only respond in a child focused way and about the children only

You need a co-parenting app. You can have it written into the court order that all communication about the children is to be handled via a coparenting app.

Stay upbeat and positive with your children. Sincerely, best of luck to you all after making this brave move.

Text is normal, it’s unusual for separated parents to speak on the phone

Just keep them shielded from as much of it as possible. Don’t slag him off in their earshot, even though he deserves it.

Good luck you you