Feel like I'm not very well-groomed and maybe should make more effort?

[Iamkaos]

I don't do anything to my eyebrows, I don't have false eyelashes, I don't have fake tan, I don't paint my nails (they're short and clean), I don't wear make up as I feel that I don't need it.
I don't even wear earrings, just a small chain necklace. I just have my natural hair and colour now, have had extensions before.
I have had most of the above in the past, but the upkeep is expensive and a lot of hassle. I do wear perfume!
I've not had any negative comments but I do wonder how I'm coming across.
I see many girls who look lovely with manicured nails, carefully applied make up, curled hair and a girly outfit.
Maybe I should try making more of an effort with my looks? I like my current look as it's so quick for me to get ready, and it's a lot cheaper.

I suppose I just wonder if I'm looking scruffy and unkempt? Though I shower and wash my hair daily, always use deodorant etc.

If you've never cared why worry about it now? I've never in my life had a single beauty treatment and I'm 39. It doesn't matter. If people enjoy it that's cool but if you don't it is meaningless.

I think this very much depends where you live for what the norm is - for instance it sounds pretty normal for London (I’m fairly sure I know nobody who has hair extensions) but Essex and Northern cities can be higher maintenance!

I don't know, I'm probably caring too much about what others think.
I do facials at home, and I do skincare, I just feel that I don't make a lot of effort with other things, but I should probably forget about it

It’s funny you should post this because I was thinking the exact same things about myself today! Like you have my natural hair colour and tend to keep everything simple, same jewellery every day. I feel like the nails, false lashes, dyed hair etc takes a lot of upkeep though. Time and money.
For me a lot of it is tied to depression, I find I don’t have the energy for much beyond showering every single day.
Sorry my post isn’t helpful! Just I can relate a lot.

You have a natural style. Why compare yourself to women who are higher maintenance? I personally find a person with ALL of those things in the daytime rather OTT but it’s horses for courses. Embrace what makes you feel good.

I don't either, I paint my nails sometimes that's it. No make up because I feel like I'm wearing a face mask or something, very rarely some lip gloss. I don't even own mascara or eyeshadow. My mum thinks I should make more of an effort she's in her 60s and wouldn't dream of leaving the house without a a face full of make up. If you are happy don't change or you could experiment with make up or different clothes and see if it makes you feel good but definitely don't change because of what other people might think.

Another faux innocence beauty bashing thread!

If you like the minimal look, why bother about what anyone else thinks? I have to say, though, you don't sound very feminine. That's fine, not everyone wants to look made-up or "girly" (I do, even though I'm 63)

Seems like.

Looking at the comment left by Greenstar22, it might be a difference in generations -
I'm 63, have always coloured my hair, blow-dried it every day, I always wear a full face of make-up when I go out of the house, always wear either a dress or a colourful top with trousers.

You do you.

If you feel you need to tidy yourself up I'm sure style and beauty has some advice.

If you're happy that's all that matters. No one else is likely to think much either way, you sound clean and natural.

Equally if you want to do more there's no harm in that.

It sounds like you might be getting a little curious with your style. maybe just need a small mix up in your life, perhaps a little restless.

I say try them, these things are not irreversible. If you don't like a nail varnish you can take it off, same goes for makeup. Eyebrows will grow back, personally I'm not one for a fake tan, I never find a shade that looks as nice as a real one on me, maybe you'll have better luck.

The main thing I'd recommend is don't go whole hog at once, you might either hate it and never dabble again, or love it and shock a friend or relative so much that they're first impression may come across stunned that you look so different it might be accidentally disappointing.

Playing with your look can be so much fun, especially if you've never felt inclined to do it before. Just remember as nice as these other girls might look, they still have to wash their face off at the end of the night, we're all human.

No idea what faux innocence beauty bashing is but I feel the same as op. Some days I can be bothered to make an effort and some days I don't care. I've worked at home all through lockdown and am still not going back to the office so I sort of think what's the point and its seems like a pointless expense.

I'm also a menopausal 50 year old married woman. I try to maintain some grooming. I don't need to dye my hair yet as no greys so just cut and blow. Paint my own nails and toenails and wear make up when I go out. And have attempted to tidy my brows but ended up shaving off half my eyebrow in the process so now have to fill it in 😂. I'm pretty hopeless with all of it tbh but attempt it anyhow. I won't do botox and all that filler stuff as its too expensive and wouldn't take from family money.

Most of the women I know (London) are the same as you - definitely no hair extensions or fake tan!

What difference would it make to your life if you were to suddenly start adding all these treatments and processes into your life? Is it really going to make you happier or more content?

I dont do any of that either, I barely bother to remove body hair. I cover greys with henna and sometimes wear eyeliner and mascara but thats it.

I take very good care of myself, I eat well, exercise, teeth are perfect. That's what's important to me.

I think hair extensions, eyelash extensions are very much a younger woman's style.

I do have my nails and hair colour done but rarely wear makeup.
Tbf on the days I do wear makeup I definitely feel better and get more compliments from friends or family.

I need a kick up the arse myself to find some motivation.

Not sure why you'd jump so quickly to this, or why you'd assume there would be such a silly agenda here, not every thread is a dig at other women as some people seem to think 🙄 Sometimes this site feels like the online school toilets with the requisite Queen Bee snark in the corner.

Only if you believe that false everything and masses of makeup = 'beauty'.

Which, y'know, no.

I’m 59 and rarely wear makeup these days although I do live it and have quite a stash!
I do have my hair cut and blow dried once a month. Mercifully I don’t really have any grey so I don’t worry about colour. I also get my eyebrows shaped and tinted monthly.
There’s no one way to do it. If you’d like to experiment, why not? Plenty of makeup counters offer lessons or makeovers at little or no cost if you buy something. Or you could just start with on or two products that just add a little polish; For instance there are various products which are suitable for lips and cheeks so you can easily coordinate, Add mascara and eyeliner and you’re your way.

@Mythreefavouritethings

Because how dare anyone not want to be like them. They spend so much time and money on it, they're invested in a lot of ways. Someone choosing otherwise might imply it's not worth it. Horrors!

How lovely that you have not bought into the crap about what women need to do to look ok, or acceptable. You dont say how old you are, but I always feel so sad when I see young women in their teens and 20s plastered in make up and with all the stuff you mention (I was one of them). I think they look perfectly lovely and beautiful without anything. I was reading something the other day that said the next big thing in manicures will be the 'no manicure look' so you are bang on trend!