To give up work

[Gogogoch]

I’m a parent carer to my autistic son (6) I have an older son too. I work part time, a week on and a week off. I recently, out of curiosity, completed a benefit calculator and I was gobsmacked that I would be £300 better off every month if I didn’t work. I enjoy my job, the social interaction and having a life outside of the house.

Being at home would mean being there for DS, his therapy appointments, being able to keep things organised as on my week on everything falls into disarray!

Has anyone done similar and how did it work out? Did you regret it?

Not working feels alien 👽 but I want to do what is best for my family.

Have you included the cost of paying into a private pension?

I pay into a pension scheme with my work - they contribute an amount every month and I pay an amount out of my wages. Do you mean paying into a private scheme if I didn’t work?

if you stay in work, are there prospects for promotion?
if you give up work, would you be able to go back to a similar job in a few years time if circumstances change?

I don’t think you are correct. Firstly the calculators are notoriously generous. Secondly - the entire thrust of Uc is that you will always be better off in employment. Might be negligible but always better off

I have just stopped working for at least a few years. I have four kids 11 and under and having worked full time throughout, I finally had to admit that 10+ years of accumulated clutter and disorganisation wasn't going to clear itself while I kept working.

I love being at home, however I am struggling with a few things;

1. I am not currently paying in to a pension and I know I need to sort that out.
2. I worry that my DH is annoyed by the amount of housework/decluttering I manage to do. I don't think he gives me any reason to worry, but I do.
3. I worry that I am not doing enough.
4. I feel resentful of doing even more housework and feel like a domestic fridge sometimes. People who put inside out/balled up washing in the wash basket make me feel unvalued and disrespected (more now than when I had a well-paid job to give me quantifiable value).
5. I miss miss miss organised days of working at a desk rather than driving miles and miles and caring for small people every.single.day
6. I feel wary about finances. Every conversation we have reassured me that DH is totally up for supporting the family etc etc, but then there's niggles and times when I have to ask him when more money will go into the account and that makes me feel vulnerable and resentful that he has all the control over the income at source.

£300 per month more money for not working sounds great though! If you can put that £300 into a pension, then I'd go for it!

Is this calculator based on getting DLA which you aren’t currently claiming? Because you can claim DLA when in work - it isn’t means tested, but it will also boost your eligibility for other benefits.

If it’s that, I’d apply for the DLA first before you quit your job, and see where you are then.

To say that you will always be better off working than not working and claiming UC is simply not true. It may well be true for some people, but not always 100% of the time, even on a basic comparison, without factoring in costs of petrol, transport, etc.

I would do it OP. Just leave work. It's a no-brainer really. Sounds so much better for the whole family.

Single parent, not working, autistic son.

op- this sounds like a recipe for depression.

of you enjoy your work, I’d stick at it.

Yes.

I’m married, so would (if DHs hours remained the same) have one week in two (give or take one day) together as a family x

That’s a good plan then. I don’t want to be left with barely anything later on

This doesn’t include DLA (we get high rate mobility and high rate care for our son). I’m including Carers allowance in this figure. Will definitely seek help just incase I have miscalculated!

Very little opportunity for promotion where I am unfortunately.

Keep working.

benefits isn’t the answer

Does he go to school op?

You need to list the benefits you say you can get and at what rates along with your and your DH salary.

And this is why benefit bashing exists. How can someone be BETTER OFF not working?

How many hours do you work? Could you reduce your hours further?

It's not clear if you are actually struggling or swayed by the UC figure. Did you actually put your DH salary into the UC estimate £300 is huge.

I would rung CAB and get someone to do the quote for you

@Badgirlriri why are you so upset? OP does work.... she has a child with additional needs we don't know the severity of them. We also don't know how this has impacted OPS well being and mental health...

To be honest and this is meant with no offence to anybody but I wouldn't swop money for a healthy and fit child! I think most will agree.