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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be so stressed out by daughter's plans for travel in South East Asia

66 replies

MrsKeats · 03/08/2022 01:01

Daughter (23) and her boyfriend are due to go travelling in September.
She is going to Singapore, Thailand, Cambodia and Vietnam.
They are both sensible but I'm freaking out about Cambodia especially seeing it described as the 'Wild West of the region' on some traveller sites.
They are going for eight weeks.
Anyone been through this?

OP posts:

Glitterheart · 03/08/2022 01:11

Not been there myself with my own children as they are too little, but travelled to all those countries myself at your daughter’s age. This was 20 years ago but even then they were a well trodden route for young backpackers, including Cambodia. She should be absolutely fine and will have a fantastic time (my own mother did also worry though 😊)

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/08/2022 01:12

Completely fine. Tell her not to miss Laos. By far the nicest country in the area.

Rtmhwales · 03/08/2022 01:13

What are you worried about? I did all of them solo as a 26 year old woman. My best friend did them all at 23, again solo. Zero issues.

Original poster

MrsKeats · 03/08/2022 01:13

Worried about crime/safety mostly.

OP posts:

summertime94 · 03/08/2022 01:14

I went to camdodia recently and it's perfectly safe. Less tourists than usual but it was a good thing for the temples.

Besttobe8001 · 03/08/2022 01:16

Those are very safe countries for backpackers. There's a well travelled route and those regions rely on the income from tourism. She might get her purse nicked but that's probably the worst thing that will happen.

GreenUp · 03/08/2022 01:22

I wouldn't worry. I solo travelled round Cambodia and had a lovely time. I don't find countries in that region unsafe (for a solo travelling woman) and she has her boyfriend their - I'm sure they'll have a great time

sausage767 · 03/08/2022 01:28

My niece travelled solo around SE Asia on a motorbike, in her early 20's. And met her partner in the world's second largest cave in Vietnam.

Don't worry about Singapore though, incredibly safe.

Wildehorses · 03/08/2022 01:31

Among the safest countries to travel through as a woman, I visited them all with female friends, I would not worry at all

redtshirt50 · 03/08/2022 01:36

Definitely don’t worry, they will have an amazing time. 1000’s of 18 year olds go to those countries solo and are totally fine. A 23 year old sensible couple is nothing to worry about at all.

although if they're only going for 8 weeks that’s a lot to pack in

if I was them I would skip Cambodia (the only think worth seeing really is Angkor wat), the rest is pretty average

i also second the vote for Laos - amazing country!

make sure they’ve also considered rainy seasons with their plans

TwoShades1 · 03/08/2022 01:43

They should be quite safe. Unless they are really getting off the beaten track or into dodgy areas (let’s face it every country has some dodgy neighbourhoods). I assume they will be going to the popular tourist places and doing touristy things so should have a great time.

Strawberries86 · 03/08/2022 01:54

Cambodia is fine, lots of backpackers. I was mid 20’s and no issues.

BigChesterDraws · 03/08/2022 01:56

I don’t know anyone who didn't go to at least one of those places as a 20-something. Many, including me, went to all of them. It’s a well-trodden path.

Dataoverloaded · 03/08/2022 01:56

Hi, I have moved to the region and regularly travel solo to those countries without any fears of safety. Singapore is perhaps the safest country in the world. As for the rest, no more dangerous than the UK. I feel more scared in London than Thailand! Of course, you need to be sensible but that's the same anywhere. Cambodia is lovely and the people are very friendly and helpful. No more dodgy than the rest. She will be fine. Feel free to message me if you have any specific queries.

AristoltlesMaths · 03/08/2022 01:57

She's a grown-up.

She will and can do whatever she choses.

And you will worry about her.

Fini!

AristoltlesMaths · 03/08/2022 01:58

Cambodia will be fine.

Really.

Binkybix · 03/08/2022 01:59

I think they will be fine - I live in Singapore and it’s incredibly safe, and I know Cambodia and Vietnam are well worn routes too.

I get the worry though - parents do that!

araiwa · 03/08/2022 01:59

I'd miss out Singapore. It's not very interesting and expensive.

I'd fly in to Kuala Lumpur and head north. Thailand, Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam are great

I've never heard of Cambodia being called particularly dangerous apart from the landmines

scarletisjustred · 03/08/2022 02:02

My son and a mate did it at around 21. They had a great time. The mate was an experienced traveller though and a polyglot. I think you just have to impress on young people that they are in a foreign country with different laws and some very poor people who may see them as easy pickings. Don't go off with random people and watch what you're drinking would be my advice as well as not carrying anything overtly valuable - no expensive watches or jewellery. I'd be cautious about leisure activities - remember they will likely not have the safety standards you would in the UK. I have personally vowed never to take a helicopter ride in less developed countries and I'd never get in a private plane in any country if the weather was bad. One tip that I think is worth passing on, after checking into a hotel, find the fire escape work out how you'd get to if there was a fire in the night. I've never had to use it but it's easy to do with no downside.

Appleblum · 03/08/2022 02:09

These countries are all very safe as long as they are sensible travellers.

Flippety · 03/08/2022 04:36

Totally understandable that you’re worried but am sure they will be fine. It’s inevitable that you will worry but you’re going to have to let her get on with it. Have you asked her to message you every few days or something? I did it without a mobile phone (many years ago!) Think my mum was beside herself!

TheBermudaTriangle · 03/08/2022 04:43

She will be absolutely fine OP. Singapore is one of the safest places on Earth (genuinely, as a woman I love it here!) and everywhere else on the list will be fine.

If you are coming from the UK (ie you have a certain level of awareness that crime can occur and of things like pickpocket risk, not flashing your gadgets and cash ostensibly) and your DD just has a sensible head, she will have a perfectly safe time.

I know you are only worrying because you love her, but please don't spoil / taint your DD's trip with you fears.

Turnthatoff · 03/08/2022 04:48

She will be fine. I’ve taken my kids to Cambodia. Twice. Angkor Wat is not to be missed!

Hotandbothereds · 03/08/2022 05:52

Ive travelled round all those areas and wouldn’t consider them particularly unsafe, never had any issues.

The main thing that would concern me is 8 weeks to cover all those places isn’t anywhere near long enough, I’d reduce the places they’re visiting because that feels like a really rushed trip.

MrsEricBana · 03/08/2022 06:20

All good advice above and the fact that she's 23 and will be with her partner would reassure me. Impress upon her not to hire scooters/quadbikes also.

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