For leaving ds with husband

[shuz1980]

Feeling quite overwhelmed with all sorts of emotions right now. Guilt being one of them. My ds is very demanding (adhd) both physically and emotionally. 10 days into the six weeks holidays and we've done something every day because he needs to be doing something with someone all the time. He just doesn't switch off from the moment he wakes until bedtime. Even bedtime is hard because he is constantly in and out of my room throughout the night wanting a drink/had a nightmare/got belly ache/not tired/needs a cuddle, its endless. I also have a 4 month old so im exhausted. Dp is not helping. He's had one day out with us other than that ive done all the playing, bath time, park trips, walks, swimming, soft play, everything. Today i woke, (dh slept in as usual) (he does work but self employed so his job is quite relaxed in when he starts and finishes work). Today ds has woke me and baby sister up intentionally because he's awake and bored. Theres no tag team with dh. Ds has just demanded my attention all morning and ive just got baby and myself and gone to my mums, leaving ds with dh. Ive cried all the way here feeling guilty. When i shouldn't l. Should I? Im giving it my all but im only human. I feel at breaking point.

Don't feel guilty at all. Have some peace and rest at your mums and concentrate on yourself and your little one.

Then when you go back sit your DH down and have a chat about how you can pull together and work as a team.

You need to be sharing things like lie ins, night waking and giving each other time off. Your DH may be more inclined to see your point after having had to cope by himself for once.

Can you come up with some father son activities like swimming or football (sorry I can't see DS's age) that they can do together at the weekend, giving you a chance to just look after your little one?

Sounds overdue op. Make it a weekly thing and don't look back.
We all need support and chance to recharge. And your dp needs chance to parent his own dc...

This sounds like much more than just adhd OP

he needs some fairly strict boundaries. Unacceptable to be intentionally waking up you and his baby sister.
have you looked in to local sports camps? Mine at them 2 days per week and absolutely love

Does he know where you’ve gone?

You’re at breaking point so you had to do something to make him step up and actually do some parenting on the kids he chose to have. Given he’s self employed with flexible hours why isn’t he pitching in?!

He’s not so you need a break and hopefully can get it today. But you know you have to go back at some point so it’s time for a serious conversation where you explain how much you’re struggling and what you insist he starts doing to play an equal part.

You've done exactly the right thing. You can't do what you need to do when you feel the way you do at the moment.

YANBU