i've just had a baby, so obviously have a lot less time on my hands as i have had in the past. yet MIL can't seem to acknowledge this and i'm starting to get annoyed. am i being an a**hole for thinking i need to put a stop to this?
she constantly expects me to call/attend/book her GP appointments with her, due to her bad english (she's been here for over 25 years, hasn't learnt it in all honesty because she's not interested). she will expect me to book her appointments, ring them for test results and also attend the appointments with her (even if that means i have to get a family member of mine to cancel their plans/work because i don't want to take a baby to a medical facility unnecessarily- i've mentioned that people attend GPs when they're unwell, and i would rather not take DS unless necessary.
her GP runs from 8am to 8pm most days of the week, and her husband works from 8-5 and my DH works from 9-5 so either of them could logically attend with her, but she asks me to go with her, to not disturb them. occasionally it would not bother me to attend with her, but when she constantly asks for me it gets too much.
her husband speaks & writes perfect english, yet she will never ask for him to do any of this for her. she will ask me, even if that means ringing me at 10pm to type a message out in english for her to send to someone as she can't write in english- whilst her husband is right next to her, who again SPEAKS AND WRITES perfect english.
i'm exhausted having a baby, i love being a mum, but any mum can recognise a baby & housework is exhausting, but i get so much more piled on me. today i had a really busy day, and i wasn't able to answer the phone when she rang me, so she proceeded to call me six times within the space of an hour to tell me she wasn't feeling well and i should call her GP about it.
she will invite herself over a lot of the times and it's not that they bother me, it's the fact that she doesn't ask "would you mind if we come over for..." as they never stay long, it's more that she doesn't think of others, and just focuses on her wants and needs.
we get along really well, and honestly i'm happy to help whenever i can, but i feel like she's taking a little bit of advantage. calling me at random times to order her food/book her an uber (whilst her DD is home and could do it..) i don't mean to seem ungrateful she offers to help with DS all the time and she's great, but sometimes she comes across as very self-centred and focused on her. she bangs on about how unwell she is, but will be all over social media and constantly on her phone rather than resting, then calls me to say she's feeling really ill.
i'm honestly just complaining now, and ive had a long day, slept horribly and i've just had it today, how would you suggest i address this with her without causing any issues? and am i being an a**hole for complaining at helping?