AIBU to think a baby shower could be fun?

[SunnyNunny]

Hoping to get some advice. I know baby showers aren't everyone's cup of tea, but my friends keep asking me when I will have one and a couple want to plan it. Having thought about it I am super excited to celebrate this pregnancy (first baby, IVF) with my friends who are also so happy for me - think could be quite fun.

I'll let my friends sort invites, decor, etc. But for logistical reasons makes sense to do it at mine I think. Now I have never been to a baby shower (honestly not sure my friends who want to plan it have either). Was thinking me and friend could make lots of nice cakes and tea/coffee/soft drinks catering wise. But what makes a lovely baby shower? Have you been to one that you really enjoyed?

Thank you :)

Your friends are all excited for you and want to celebrate and make you feel loved before you do something massive and possibly won’t be able to spend much time together for a while. So have a lovely party!

I loved mine, I didn't think I would have one but my friends wanted to organise one. Afternoon tea, friends, (men and women), no gifts, no games, no expectations, lovely afternoon.

Thanks - some good suggestions there!
When I said I’ll make cake I didn’t mean a wedding cake 😂 I mean I/ we can make various baked goods that people can help themselves to.
Re gifts, I get your point but people a) know no gifts are expected (I don’t celebrate my birthday etc, it’s just not me) but b) I know they will absolutely be bringing gifts. Half of them have been hinting and talking about how excited they are to give me whatever it is they got. I think that’s a friendship group thing though.

Congrats on your pregnancy !
I've been to two, both for my expectant niece, and they were a really nice way to spend an afternoon. She booked a room in a local pub, a nice one overlooking the water. She laid on food, cheese board / charcuterie kind of 'picky' stuff, I did a 'baby themed' playlist for background music 😁there were a few 'games' but as in we each wrote down a 'guess the weight', 'guess the date' - mainly it was chatting, music, drinks and gifts for the baby.

Yes, the best baby shower I've been to was essentially the same garden party/bbq my friend would have thrown if she hadn't been pregnant. The email invite subject was "NOT a baby shower". No gifts, no weird games, no themes. Partners came too. It was a great afternoon/evening!

The worst featured an unspeakable game where differently textured chocolate was meant to represent differently textured baby poo. That was when I made my excuses along with a gay friend who spent the walk back to the station in shock and huffing about heterosexual depravity (he was right tbh).

The best baby shower I ever went to was the one I organised for my daughter. Cupcakes and cocktails (with lots of mock tails and herbal teas etc. ). It was a lovely chilled out Afternoon with the younger women my daughters age 20-25 ( a few were pregnant), a few toddlers/kids and the older generations just sat around in a lovely summer garden eating nice food, talking about our pregnancy/birth experiences, the funny/sad times were had and talking about the future for the babies. What were hoped they would be like, who they would take after etc. best buys, worst buys. It was a lovely way of involving everybody, even the woman that were happy child free talked openly about their own choices etc. but that's just the sort of people we are. No cringey games although my daughter insisted on doing a dads race on who could change the nappy on the stuffed toy the fastest 🤷🏼‍♀️😂

Then after 2-3 hours everybody went home and I got to eat the rest of the cake 😁

Agree that a get together with tea and cake is the best. NO games and NO requirement for gifts mentioned anywhere.

Something I would add: one social group at a time. However much you love your aunts and cousins I have no desire to sit and chat with them, and usually you get an awfully dull vibe as everyone mutes their normal personalities.

My sister will be given strict instructions to head off any baby shower nonsense, and I will be saying to anyone who asks that we'd like to receive second hand only.

I didn't plan a baby shower and I do think organised ones planned by the expectant mother are weird and over the top. However my 4 close girl friends surprised me with one on a day when we were meeting for lunch anyway.

They brought cupcakes and a sash for me to wear (bit of fun), we did guess the bump size with string, and an awful game with melted chocolate bars in nappies and you had to guess the chocolate! However it was just the five of us, a bit of fun and mainly a catch up.

So yeah, don't take it too seriously, tea, cake and people who care about you are all you need :)

A “group of women celebrating birth” sounds like my worst nightmare.

op I agree with other posters. A little tea party sounds lovely. Anything involving actual elements of a baby shower is hideous.

I loved mine but I wanted to treat my friends and family to a Prosecco party as they had supported me through my TTC journey. I didn’t want anyone to be out of pocket!!!! Even though I couldn’t drink I didn’t see why everyone else had to sit around sober drinking tea and eating cakes. Everyone had far too much Prosecco, there was a grazing table. No Games but lots of dancing around the kitchen. No cards or gifts but everyone was asked to bring a book old or new and write a message in that.

I've been to loads and they are really boring. The games and twee "wishes for baby X" are mildy crap the first time and bloody tedious the 20th time.

Invite people round for a get together if you want but leave out the forced "fun".

Massively unlucky to celebrate a baby before it's born. In my culture it's akin to a curse.

I think they're cringey to be honest. Especially if you're mashing together family and different friendship groups who don't know each other that well. Ive never enjoyed them and even when people say they don't expect/want presents, they often secretly do and everyone feels pressured to bring something anyway.

No family invited :)