Secret confessions thread

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Okay, so, we all have these thoughts; things we know we DEFINITELY are being unreasonable about and yet we can't help but think them.

This is that thread. A chance to say whatever you want judgement free. You know it's silly, you know it makes no sense but it's how you feel. Feel free to share! It might make me feel a little less crazy.

I'll go first...

My best friend gave birth to twins today and I am INSANELY jealous. Simply because I want twins. I know it's stupid, I know I likely won't even have twins but I want them so badly and now she has them. I feel like she's stolen the twin dust and there will be none left for me!

Like I said - just somewhere to post how you're feeling consequence free

I'm about to have sex with a hot guy I only know through Facebook and mutual friends . We're going to drive away in his car to a quiet place and screw like there's no tomorrow.

I have a crush on my boss. He's tall, bald and fit. I check him out all the time. In meetings I picture him bending me over his desk and taking me!

Not RTFT but have four month old twins and want to explode slightly when someone tells me they want twins. I’m clearly yet to get to the “blessing” stage but having to watch one baby cry and be unable to do anything because you’re sorting the other is freaking heartbreaking and it boggles my mind that anyone would actively want that.

When l was in my twenties, l was in my local with my mate. I went to the bar and while waiting to be served, l had my arse groped by a foreign sailor who was sitting on a stool next to where l was standing (l lived in a port town).
I was so infuriated l punched him and knocked him backwards off the stool.
It all kicked off, he was with a group of friends, but the landlord backed me up (I and my mates were regulars and spent a lot of money in the pub) and threw the lot of them out.
For the record, l'm just a shade over five feet tall and l was about seven and a half stone at the time. When he got up off the floor, he was a big sod. I must either have caught him off balance, or hit him harder than l thought!

I adore my children but I fantasize everyday about when they’ve left home and me and my husband can actually live our lives again. I’m not a maternal person and I see raising kids as a life sentence really.

I'm 43 and feel this in my core.

I’m not sure I want to have kids anymore. This is a very new development and has definitely been brought on by the pandemic, but I never in a million years thought I’d ever feel like this as it’s been my main goal since childhood.

I can’t stand my BiL, he’s turned into everything he despised 10 years ago and now thinks he’s above most of us. I’m not mad on his wife as I realised that the nasty things she said about others behind their backs she probably says about me behind mine.

I'm secretly in love with one of my male friends, I haven't said anything to him, he is just such a bad boy though 😬😎I'm with someone so I shouldn't be thinking like this, Ugh!!! I'll never say a word this I know, I would be afraid of messing up our friendship

Ooh I have a few!

1. One of my best friends has a little girl, who I love, but who will not leave me the fuck alone when I go round. I have to go round before she goes to bed so she can see me. I don’t mind 5 - 10 mins with her, but she wants me to play non stop until she’s sent to bed. Which is usually a good half an hour or so after I’ve arrived. I just want my alcoholic drink and to have some girl chat. Like go to bed already!

2. Whenever I hear my bitch nightmare neighbour coughing I say “Choke you bastard”, in the hope that she will indeed choke herself to death so I no longer have to deal with her abusive and shitty behaviour. I often fantasise about winning the lottery and paying a top hitman to take her out once and for all. Just for the craic.

3. I’ve had such major withdrawal symptoms since this last season of Stranger Things finished, I’ve watched it from the beginning every week since. It’s like I can’t stop.

My partner has gone past the fantasising stage. Really made our relationship closer and very horny

I have an ex who was beyond abusive. I found out his unborn child passed at 38weeks. Whilst I felt awful for the lady he was with (even though so was that affair - although I dont blame her for getting sucked in), my very first thought was what a lucky escape that child had. He has 2 other children with a lady before our relationship and I saw how he was with them.

To make it worse, I told my friend what happened (not about my first thoughts) and she said it was karma.

Now I'm in a very healthy happy relationship but I have infertility issues and I have this deep feeling that its because I'm being punished for what I thought.... although if I'm honest I've always had the feeling I would be infertile, just now I have something to 'hang it on'.

To be totally pissed that this guy I got with when I was 18 treated me like total crap. He was abusive and controlling and gaslit me all of the time. He was older so I was in love with him. He would even get me to alibi him if the police called. I was besotted with him and went back to him several times. He slagged me off to everyone, made me feel like a fool and then the girls he got with after me he treated so nice and proper relationships. This really screwed up my relationships after him as I just didn’t trust anyone and thought that guys would only want me for sex. Looking back on it as an adult I’ve realised how damaging he was for me

Brilliant!!! 🤣🤣🤣

Having two Range Rovers? Part joking part serious because I have a SIL who thinks having things makes her better than anyone else - sure that’s not you tho’

I despise my eldest niece. She came to my dad's funeral (her g.dad) earlier this year pretending to give a shit. He tried getting in touch with her to rebuild bridges a couple years ago and she was a bitch to him, made him feel awful then proceeded to ask him for money and ignored him when he didn't have it. She thinks no one knows but I do as my dad and I were so close. I had never seen him so sad.

On a side note it feels great to get it out...

I do the same with Soldier Soldier. Sad innit🙄

Oh my god this is the first one that shocked me!

I absolutely hate my partner's family - I broke my leg in three places last year and was alone as my partner had gone abroad for work two days before. Not one text from them let alone any offer of help!! His father is retired and lives ten mins away. I don't have family in this country and his sister lied and said she'd texted me ... errr... no she didn't! My partner was emailing them keeping them up to date as I was in Hospital for a week - my response was 'why? They clearly don't give a you know what about me!' Still haven't seen them nor heard from them nine months later! At least I can just about walk now! My neighbours have been amazing (they are my angels!) They looked after my dog and even cooked for me every day until my partner returned from work - I can't thank them enough and will be eternally grateful to them.

I had a two year relationship with a lass 20 years ago.
My DP isn't aware, I've never told her.
I can't remember DPs phone number, despite being together for 11 years. I remember the lass' number to this day.
🤫

Yup 😔

My DH had been addicted to Marijuana for years and he finally gave up on Sunday. His mood swings and misery has made me scared to leave my DD 21 months alone with him. When i shower i do it with the door open and for literally minutes only washing my privates and underarms.
I'm terrified for her to be left alone with him. and i feel sorry for her that I've allowed her to be in this situation :(

Last week I properly shit myself. I've been taking fibre supplements and didn't make it to the loo. Never in my adult life has this happened.

I secretly look forward to my mother's demise. She deserves it, she's a toxic, black widow multiple marriages bitch.

My brother was/is the golden child and revelled in it when we were young. I frequently took punishments for things he had done, knowing that I would be blamed and beaten. Sometimes I used to brush the dog's teeth with his toothbrush and put it back without rinsing.

My brother is much nicer to me now. But I will never tell him about the toothbrush. He's none the wiser; I got my own back without resorting to violence and the dog always had a nice sparkly set of gnashers. Everyone's a winner...

I'm in love with my best friend and have been for the last ten years but he says he doesn't fancy me 😔. We had a brief physical relationship when we first met.

I wish I didn't feel for him and could find someone who actually wants me but every time I try I seem to attract drunks or really old men who I don't find attractive in any way.

There's some very sick people on here.