AIBU for not caring about a fly?

[Snowflakewater]

(26 f)So my dad for his own reasons has a dislike of flys so if I’m busy doing something and there’s a fly he has to inconvenience me and tell me to cover my food and can I see where it’s gone blah blah.

Today there was a fly in the kitchen, I was about to eat dinner, I normally argue with him about making me pause to look for a fly.

Today I just rolled my eyes and sighed and sat at the table because I was hungry and he walks in and says “there’s a fly cover your food quickly” I just COULD NOT be bothered with this today.

So he then says “instead of rolling your eyes just cover your food will you, why would you want a fly to sit on it. There’s no need for you to be rude about something I don’t like. The rudeness and attitude isn’t needed”

I walked out the room as I said, can’t be bothered. So then it turns into an argument and we go into things not even related to the fly. (I recently wanted to walk out but my dad took my keys as I’m stubborn).

So I said “I’ll walk out if you carry on behaving like this iver a fly I don’t need a penny off you both” anyway my mum then gets involved and reels a list of the things they pay for which is a fair amount to be honest and I said “I’m not standing here listening to this” then she said “you better listen, or you know my temper I’ll throw my food In the bin and we’ll continue this conversation upstairs or you listen now” I then said “I pay for weekly food shops, half the car payment and what I can afford within my pay. The rest I cannot do” I did shout at this point I’ll be honest.

I walked off, and later on they come and give me a hug and act like nothing happened?

AIBU for this or are they? Because I don’t know if I’m in the wrong here

Er, you were rude and unreasonable.

I’m gonna be honest, I have adhd and also atm I not medicated so I can’t see where I was rude here? I haven’t got patience at all

I must admit I'm the same with flies. If there's one in the room I have to get rid of it, and I certainly wouldn't want one landing on my dinner.

sounds like this is just part of a bigger picture. are you living at home with your parents when you are 26? do they resent having you there? do you have options to move out? get your own place if you possibly can and then you won't need to have petty arguments.

Didn’t you just post this on Reddit too?

He’s rude about it though. Maybe that’s because I roll my eyes, but literally everything has to be at a standstill till it’s gone.

This. Time to move out. You need your own space,

Hmmm I think it’s part of a bigger picture of me being unmedicated with adhd and moved out and had to move back in and work stress!

I do very much need that.

That’s fair, but to make others cover everything and pause till it’s gone, dramatic surely?

I can’t believe you are 26. Unmedicated ADHD or not. You can’t see where you were rude?

• rolling your eyes


• sighing


• walking out of the room


• shouting

i get that your dad was probably being a bit over the top about a fly, but your response was an over-reaction.

Flies are disgusting. They land in shit, of course you shouldn't let them land on your food.

But his attitude is wrong, no?

Sorry but I'm chuckling at this. I have never ever heard anyone say "quick cover your food there is a fly". It would drive me mad if every single time there was a fly someone said this.
TBF sounds like a normal family argument. It's good they've moved on and forgotten about it.

But you know that when there is a fly in the room tomorrow he will once agina tell you to cover your food 🤣🤣

I ignore it but he gets quite heated over it. J don’t think it’s a normal family argument.

i honestly don’t think other families disagree quite like mine.

I'm with you op. Your parents escalated the situation with their response.

Why couldn't either of them get the fly?

Dunno

Surely your own food is your business. If you don't care about your own food and the fly, that shouldn't be your dads concern. If he wanted you to pause and help cover the communal serving dishes - fair enough.

I agree with you, OP. I hate flies, but I wouldn't dream of making everyone stop and cover their meal if there was one. How ridiculous! I'd shoo it away with my hand and swat it after everyone was finished.

YANBU about the fly
YWBU in your reaction and for the stroppy teenange behaviour.

Exactly. It’s just stupid

Oh but he’s not instigating with the “ why are you eye rolling” comments

Your dad over reacted about the fly imo, but people are allowed to be a bit like that in their own homes if they want to. it’s not up to you to decide wether your dad was unreasonable or not, it’s his home that he pays for and he can be unreasonable if he wants

At 26, I think it’s up to you to respect the odd little things your parents might do and suck it up. You were wrong to be rude and you were especially wrong to threaten to walk out. That was very immature.

I think neither side covered themselves in glory. I fully admit I find it incredibly irritating when people are fussy and prissy to the nth degree about insects. Especially the "warning" to others. Its an odd assumption that anyone is going to just let a fly land on their food without swatting it away before it gets too close (including a pp....do you think people just let them land ?) Grown adults wittering for others to cover their food as if they wouldn't swat the fly away is just silly.

That said clearly there is more going on and frankly you don't have a leg to stand on if they are paying the majority of things for you which it sounds like. It sounds like it is a problem you being there. It does sound like you are also taking advantage a bit , you say their list is longer of what they pay for. It also is telling that kicking back with the fact you buy food is a childish reaction. You buy food and also eat it. Its not a favour.

Time to move out if you possibly can.

As pp said , I understand the irritation with fussy people over insects but it's their house and they can be fussy in it. Don't like it then leave.