Life never went the way it should. How to get over it

[TheP0]

Hello basically life never went the way most people's do. I know it sounds corny but I'm behind on everything and failed at almost everything.
I'm also way past the age of having kids now.
I don't get any dates or any men interested and I've been ugly from the start though so i know why that never happens either.
Where do i go from here? I feel lost and terrible that it's all finished for me. I have nothing and noone and never will. I think my luck will never change and im exhausted.
Any advice welcome

You are only feeling that way because you are comparing yourself to other people. It’s never too late to change, if you are not happy about something - change it! You can do it.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Stop comparing yourself to others, and work on things you want to improve.
You might need some professional assistance eg a psychologist?

Have a think about things that are in your control and give you joy doing. Focus on other areas of your life, such as career, volunteering, hobbies, fitness etc.

Ugly is personality. I’m sure you’ve got many beautiful qualities.
Start with a new mindset,

Can you relocate? I always think a fresh start can give you a completely new outlook.

I’m sorry OP, that sounds hard. I don’t get the impression that you only feel this way due to looking at other people. It’s perfectly normal to want to be loved and many people do want a family too.

I don’t know if it helps to know you’re not alone, I know a few other lovely women in your shoes.

Can I suggest you look up the DBT concept of radical acceptance? I've never had DBT myself but found this a really really useful concept - effectively accepting that there are bad things in life, it doesn't work out the way we want it and there will be things you can't change BUT that doesn't stop you taking the action you can take.

You are not ugly.

How on earth do any of us know how life 'should' have gone?
I 'should' have stayed married and had my two children and my career 'should' have taken off
But, you know, life
So the ex cheated and one child died in a road accident and my career sort of halted
It's just life, there's no guarantees.

I think you're looking at others peoples lives with rose tinted specs.

What do you have that is important to you? Friends? Family? Good neighbours? Pets?

If you're not dead it's not all finished. It's horrible that you won't be able to have your own kids and haven't had romance yet, but life has so much more to offer than those two things alone. Maybe try and find those things... travel, write a book, learn a new skill, read more, create a goal and work like hell to achieve it.

Don't waste anymore of your life thinking about what could've been.