Coldsore and newborn baby

[Annoyedastupidpeople]

Stressed and angry!! Been to a family party today, a cousin of my husband who I don’t know had a cuddle of the baby, (8 weeks old, been poorly had few courses of antibiotics since birth) when I turned round her 4 children were holding babies hand and kissing her, the eldest had huge cold sore on her mouth .. I took her off the cousin and expressed my annoyance - she and her mother and others seem to think I am being over the top and unreasonable .. is it me?!?! I don’t understand how someone would do that with a cold sore and the parents and grandparents not caring either …. I am also worried about my little one … 🥲🥲🥲

Bump

That's awful - I'd be raging if someone risked my baby getting a cold sore.

You are not being unreasonable. I spent 3 days totally alone in hospital with my little one after she was born because my DH earned himself a ban from the ward by breaking out with a cold sore. He was only allowed back after 48 hours of treatment. I wouldn't go quite that far but there is no way I would touch anyone else's baby when I had a cold sore.

I would be furious, we've not been letting anyone kiss our DS while he's so little!

Not unreasonable at all. Babies don't have an amazing immune system at birth. It improves with vaccinations at 2, 3, 4 months and through their environment.
It's totally reasonable not to let people kiss her while she's so young and anyone with any kind of cold etc to not be near her.

You are absolutely not being unreasonable. I would be furious.

No way are you being unreasonable - I'd be fuming. That could kill your baby - I'm not meaning to be melodramatic and I'm sure your baby will be fine, but who the fuck takes that risk. Raging!

YANBU, my nephew died of neonatal herpes when he was 3 months old (after having got very ill at 6 weeks).

The doctors said he would've come into contact with someone who had a cold sore.

Not unreasonable at all, I’m fairly relaxed about illness around kids but I genuinely think there’s a lack of awareness about HSV risk for newborns and a need for more education. On an individual basis I’m sure your LO will be fine BTW, but totally get your anger.

@TeapotTitties I am so so sorry to hear that … and thank you for sharing xxx

thank you all for comments, I am sat in my own thoughts tonight and just upset. I just can’t believe people could be so stupid. And I won’t be putting her at risk again x

Thanks OP and I'm sure your baby will be fine, as it's fortunately quite rare

I do genuinely think an awful lot of people just don't know the dangers. I wish there was more awareness surrounding it.

I'm so sorry

Sorry I realise this was a month ago but relating to this at the moment!
I have a coldsore myself so I'm so stressed about the risk of passing it to my newborn baby. She's just gone 3 months old.
I'm her main carer I've been strict with hand washing and not letting it come into contact with her but I'm still really stressed about it 😢😢
It says symptoms would show within 2-12 days and coldsore doesn't go away completely until 2 weeks basically. I'm so upset about not kissing my newborn and showing her less love than normal 😢 how awful.

Also totally agree with the comments about lack of education with cold sores and new borns. Luckily I'm a googler so I googled it straight away but I didn't know of any risks either.
I'm upset that I was kissing her the day before and was potentially contagious then? I didn't feel any coldsore tingles or anything.

There is a risk of RSV and HSV when people kiss babies

As well as transferring colds and anything else the person can pass through this type of contact

To Rach1st baby above…

As a “Googler” as you mentioned, you will see medical journals / evidence etc. to show that babies are known to inherit antibodies against HSV virus from an infected mother, as you carry live antibodies.

This will offer some protection to your baby.

Neonatal herpes is almost always a “primary” case eg. no exposure to antibodies from the mother. Therefore can be severe when first encountered.

Obviously take precautions to protect your child if you are getting prodromal symptoms, active sore etc. but please don’t beat yourself up about this.

You are clearly a loving parent and doing the best for your baby.

@Rach1stbaby I totally sympathise - I had a coldsore when baby was first born and couldn't give her kisses for weeks for fear of passing the virus to her. Lots of cuddles though and skin to skin. Anyway just replying to say get some of the cold sore patches - so helpful for your peace of mind to make sure if you accidentally come into contact (forgetful kiss, touching your lip then baby, baby touching your face etc.) then you've had that barrier to prevent contamination.

@BabyNo11989 thanks so much for your reply, thats all great information. I got some of the coldsore patches and I've been wearing them ever since, they seem to be doing a great job.
Also thank god I did get them, baby just brushed my top lip with her hand - very upset with myself. Ive managed to avoid all the contact so far just that one little brush.
Anyway I sprayed her hands immediately with this baby sanitiser spray I have and then washed them under sink.
It's hard not to freak out about this, when they are so fragile.xx

For fucks sake what is it with some people not giving a shit about spraying their germs at newborns?? Something tells me they would suddenly remember it’s a bad idea if it was THEIR baby. YANBU, something like this happened to my DD as a baby, I went down a google rabbit hole and if it helps, neonatal herpes is very rare in babies over 6 weeks old. Something about just 6 weeks outside the womb is enough to develop an immune system that keeps it out, it’s much more likely to affect babies that are literally days old. Hope you’re okay.

@CleanseUsAcidRain thanks for your comment 😊 yes I've got the patches now, as I was just saying to @BabyNo11989 baby has managed to brush my lip, so I was freaking out a bit. I can't imagine how much I would have freaked out without a patch.
One week down tomorrow, just another to go hopefully.
I feel like I'll be paranoid about kissing my newborn all the time now though. It's awful xx

@Wouldloveanother sorry I know this isn't my original post but just wanted to say thanks for commenting. It's reassuring that it effects babies less than 6 weeks generally, mine is 14 weeks today and is fully breastfed (I hope that that would also help re antibodies).
It's difficult not to get really wrapped up in worry when they are so fragile and your fully responsible for them 😔❤️

The cold sore patches are a god send! DS is 3 now but I still always put a patch on at the first feeling of a tingle. They seem to dry them out really quickly, too. I always keep them in stock in my bathroom cupboard now. My DS also brushed my lip with his hand last week when I was wearing one and I'm so thankful I had it one.

I hope it quickly heals and you can get back to showering your little one with kisses ❤️