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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think if you've chosen to nap on the sofa you can't expect silence?

18 replies

LG93 · 23/07/2022 16:59

We had a rough night with DD1 last night with a tummy bug so DH was trying to have a nap to catch up on sleep on the sofa, but kept moaning that 'nobody was letting him sleep'. I should point out it was just normal noise, dd1 switching between tablet and toys, dc2 (6 months) banging his toys together but he obviously doesn't understand. I pointed out that if it was too noisy he could just go upstairs and nap on the bed where he won't be disturbed but apparently he doesn't want to.

AIBU to think if he's going to insist on sleeping on the sofa he needs to accept there will be more noise?!

OP posts:
drawacircleroundit · 23/07/2022 17:01

He’s feeling sorry for himself, poor lamb.

Outlyingtrout · 23/07/2022 17:02

Yes you are absolutely right. It’s basic common sense. Is he always an arse or is it just the tiredness talking?

FionnulaTheCooler · 23/07/2022 17:06

YANBU. I'm assuming you are also sleep deprived? I'd be telling him to get upstairs and have a sleep or I'd be doing it and leaving him to deal with the kids.

Original poster
LG93 · 23/07/2022 17:09

Outlyingtrout · 23/07/2022 17:02

Yes you are absolutely right. It’s basic common sense. Is he always an arse or is it just the tiredness talking?

No he's not always an arse 🤣 He works long hours this time of year so I don't doubt he's exhausted, but it's like trying to reason with a toddler this afternoon!

OP posts:
jjeoreo · 23/07/2022 17:13

Hah, had the exact same discussion with my husband this afternoon. There is something about men and..."catching up with the news" on their phones, trying to nap in a communal area and getting mardy, and spending hours having a poo.

God bless them.

Original poster
LG93 · 23/07/2022 17:14

FionnulaTheCooler · 23/07/2022 17:06

YANBU. I'm assuming you are also sleep deprived? I'd be telling him to get upstairs and have a sleep or I'd be doing it and leaving him to deal with the kids.

In fairness, I got an extra couple of hours this morning and then co slept with the baby when he napped so I don't feel too bad, and I don't begrudge him a couple of hours to catch up too but I refuse to all sit in silence to facilitate it when he can just go upstairs like I did!

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 23/07/2022 17:15

I pointed out that if it was too noisy he could just go upstairs and nap on the bed where he won't be disturbed but apparently he doesn't want to.

Apparently he doesn't want to sleep either. Is he always so stupid?

MrsTerryPratchett · 23/07/2022 17:23

If little children HIBU. With my bloody DH HIBU the noisy bastard.

Figmentofimagination · 23/07/2022 17:27

I've had covid the past week and have been sleeping downstairs as it's easier to sleep sat up (stupid blocked nose) and it was cooler downstairs in the heatwave.
Whilst I napped on the sofa when I could during the day, I was never under the impression that everyone had to be quiet for me to sleep. DH would apologise if I was woken up but I was never annoyed because it's a communal area. I also never got annoyed if people woke me up for the day, because again it's a communal area.

My dad does this all the time and expects silence. It especially frustrates me when we get invited round for a few hours at the weekend and then he decides it's his nap time and complains my 5 year old DS is too loud.

DinosaursEatMan · 23/07/2022 17:34

I have one of those too, my sympathies. I spend my time ‘not letting’ him sleep on the sofa, or ‘not letting’ him have enough relaxation time because he has to pitch in with household chores.

Ihatethenewlook · 23/07/2022 17:39

My dad was like that. He was an evil bastard. He was one of those types that liked to get up at 5am and call me and my sister lazy bitches for getting up at 7/8am, but then used to spend a good 3 hours every afternoon napping the couch. I remember me and my sister being barely more than babies and tip toeing round terrified of waking him up. If I were you I’d deliberately make more noise instead of less, make him realise what a tit he’s being

CornedBeef451 · 23/07/2022 17:42

DH used to do that until toddler DS whacked him in the balls with an inflatable hammer.

He now naps elsewhere if required.

AlohaMolly · 23/07/2022 17:44

Ahh my DP does this too, usually around 5pm, just as witching hour descends. No fun for anyone!

CallOnMe · 23/07/2022 17:46

Yes of course he should just go upstairs for a nap!
What a ridiculous thing for him to say!

midsomermurderess · 23/07/2022 18:12

Aquamarine1029 · 23/07/2022 17:15

I pointed out that if it was too noisy he could just go upstairs and nap on the bed where he won't be disturbed but apparently he doesn't want to.

Apparently he doesn't want to sleep either. Is he always so stupid?

Are you always so casually and spitefully rude?

InFiveMins · 23/07/2022 18:17

DP's dad used to do this - he was an abusive arsehole. Used to nap on the sofa and expect household silence rather than just go to bed Hmm From seeing other posts on this thread it seems to be a common trait among abusive men.

Tell him to put up and shut up or fuck off to bed.

SpilltheTea · 23/07/2022 18:19

I'd tell him he can sleep there tonight instead. Stupid man.

Wetblanket78 · 16/12/2022 23:38

Well it's not like he's on his own with the children. He had a choice to go back to bed. One night of broken sleep is nothing compared to two nights sleep deprivation. Trying to sleep on a noisy hospital ward on a recliner chair next to son. It then takes me about a week to get back into a sleep routine.

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