husbands family

[bellamqrie]

Husbands family members and i are on a facebook groupchat, they usually call every day, i sometimes answer sometimes can't, but without fail there usually is a phone call 3/4 times a day, so i was surprised when my DH was on the phone with his aunt, cousins and mum, and my phone hadn't rang.

I didn't think too much into it, but then realised they created a new groupchat excluding myself and my DH's cousins girlfriend. So they left out myself and the other family girlfriend, basically the "non-family members"

my DH didn't address this, so i haven't either, but AIBU to think this is weird? why were we cut out
of the group? usually DH mentions every little thing even prior to me being in said groupchat, so why wouldn't he address this?

just finding it bizarre??

It wouldn't personally bother me but depends on the family dynamic I suppose. Did you ask your DH about it?

There must be a reason. My family uses WhatsApp and we have groups for just the siblings, siblings and parents, everyone including all in laws. No idea which came first. The family without inlaws one is for stuff like my brother saying his wife is very stressed with her health so can we be extra supportive, or my sister planning something for her husband’s birthday, it’s not anything negative or unkind.

Family group calls 4 times a day?!! Eeshhk! I'd be happy to avoid that!

no, i didn't want to mention it because if it was something importante he'd mention it, thought perhaps it was a private matter?? probably is and i'm just exaggerating

from as long as i can remember they only use one group, it's the sort of family that say everything because it's a close bunch, only about 10 of us, which is why i'm wondering why we were then excluded

3/4 times a day?

I'd call that a lucky escape if I were you!

3/4 calls A DAY?!?
Cousins GF etc, sounds a bit OTT
I'd be glad to be left out 🤣

I'd be relieved if I were you

But I don't think it's wrong for them to want a chat that's just immediate family.

Perhaps it's due to a lovely reason such as a surprise birthday party for you? (Optimistic)

Our family group chat doesn't include partners.

At 3/4 calls a day, I'd have left the group long time ago TBH.

just be grateful! Who the heck wants to answer 3/4 times a day?

We have a family group which does not include our husbands/partners or children. Nothing to hide, but sometimes it's just nice to speak to my sisters and parents like in the "olden days".

from as long as i can remember they only use one group, it's the sort of family that say everything because it's a close bunch, only about 10 of us, which is why i'm wondering why we were then excluded
Sorry I know its how you work it, but I'd feel suffocated if I couldn't speak to my siblings without including their partner!

I wouldn't even bat an eyelid!
In DH's family there is me, dh, FIL, SIL1, BIL2 & SIL2 and we have so many groups with every possible combination! Including groups just missing 1 person for birthday gift messages and 1 just for DH, FIL, SIL1 & BIL2 (the "blood" family)

i get all the comments, and i don't really mind not being in the groupchat, im not fussed about it. it's just they seem to be walking on eggshells around it, it just all seems to be a bit weird. i'm all for him speaking to family and they having their personal discussions. i just found it weird how they're going about it, and the answering the phone almost secretive?? i've often discussed a few things i don't agree with and feel as though they may be a bit annoyed???

Could the cousin's girlfriend have complained about the frequency of calls and so they've set up a new one without partners?

My first thought too! My daughter who lives a long way away may phone every couple of weeks, she will whatsapp the odd thing, my more local daughter I may see once a week but it can go longer if they're busy. Until I started looking at MN I never realised how claustrophobic and clingy many families are!

perhaps, they've just now focused on even texting on this group and ignoring the other, which is fine, im not bothered by this but for a group who talks multiple times a day, to only talking on a separate group minus myself and DH cousins girlfriend, it feels a little weird??

I'd be glad they made a new group tbh... their calls are way too frequent for my liking