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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lost my temper and swore at a group of kids today

54 replies

Hotsummer2022 · 17/07/2022 17:11

I was driving home earlier and decided to stop by my local Costa to grab a drink. I drove down the hill into the retail park where a group of kids/teenagers (looked to be around 14-15) were messing around in the street. I stopped to let them cross and they walked back onto the kerb. It didn't look like they wanted to cross and were just messing around so I proceeded to go and they walked back into the street so I had to slam on my brakes again. They did this a couple of times so I asked them if they wanted to cross or not as otherwise I needed to get past them and they just started laughing. By this point there were a few cars behind me waiting to go so as I went to go again the kids did the same thing. I put my hand out to let them cross and finally they did (a few behind the car and a couple in front) and then I heard a big thud. They threw something at my car (no idea what it was and I've checked now that I've got home and there's no obvious damage) but by this point I was really annoyed. I kept my cool and finally they walked off but as I went to turn right into the drive thru I realised they'd dumped a huge cone in front (I know it was them as I'd seen one of them carrying it when I was driving down the hill but didn't realise they'd put it there with all the commotion) and I had to slam on my breaks again and the car behind me nearly went into the back of me.

I heard them all laughing as they were walking off so I really lost my temper and shouted out the window "you fucking bunch of brats" and everyone was looking at me. The kids just walked off and didn't say anything back. I immediately felt embarrassed and I'm really annoyed at myself now that I let a bunch of kids wind me up so much, but at the same time if I'd of hit them with my car it would of been my fault even though they were messing around in the street, and then to throw something at my car too. There was just no need for it at all. I was their age once and granted I messed around with my friends but I knew better than to mess around in the street where there were cars and I didn't throw things at my people's cars either, and they could have caused an accident putting the cone in front of the drive thru also.

In hindsight I shouldn't have lost my temper and I'd probably be really upset if someone spoke to my kids that way. I did tell the Costa staff that they'd dumped a cone in front of the drive thru and cars were having to stop because of it but they weren't interested. Have you ever lost your temper with a group of teenagers? I can't be the only one surely. Kids eh!

OP posts:
WhatNoRaisins · 17/07/2022 17:56

I've seen this sentiment before on here and don't get it. If my offspring were behaving like shits it would never occur to me to feel hard done by because people didn't attempt to gently and softly correct them.

Notimeforaname · 17/07/2022 17:57

Ah that's fine. Little shits. A few months ago some teenage boys were lashing coins at peoples heads on the bus. They got me with one... I told them I would break their fucking necks if they touched me again. They didn't.

Hotsummer2022 · 17/07/2022 18:01

Thank you everyone!

I'm actually a little relieved to hear that most of you would of done the same and I don't feel so bad now. I guess I just felt terrible because I was the adult in the situation and should of stayed calm, but yes you are right, they were behaving really dangerously and could caused of caused an accident. Kids just don't think do they. I've calmed down and enjoying the rest of this lovely weather we're having 😅

OP posts:
20viona · 17/07/2022 18:03

I'd say far worse than you did, id go fucking wild arseholes.

Thefriendlymoth · 17/07/2022 18:04

They weren’t just being brats, they were being dangerous. They could have caused an accident.

Babdoc · 17/07/2022 18:05

You may even have saved the stupid teens’ lives if they think twice about their activities in future.
We had an 8 year old killed playing chicken at 9pm on our dual carriageway with older kids, a few years ago. The poor paramedic who was first on scene to the mangled remains was traumatised.

TheFallenMadonna · 17/07/2022 18:05

You gave them the response they were looking for. They won't be bothered about it beyond that, sadly.

CallOnMe · 17/07/2022 18:09

YANBU I would have probably called them much worse and I’m a secondary school teacher used to teenagers!

If my own DC did this I’d hope someone would call them out too!

CallOnMe · 17/07/2022 18:10

Also try not to take it personally.
It wasn’t you personally they were targeting and it could have been anyone.

To them they were just having a laugh and weren’t hurting anyone.
But I know how personal it can feel.

Myonlysunshine123 · 17/07/2022 18:12

I did something similar last week, 3-4 teenage boys were weaving about in front of our car, then on to the pavement, deliberately winding us up, kept going on down a windy road so I called 1 of them a little fuckin prick! If my son did something so stupid and dangerous I'd expect him to be told off too,

Spanielsarepainless · 17/07/2022 18:27

I flicked a V-sign at a tailgating van driver as I turned off the main road and he was hurling abuse for some reason. Much to the surprise of an elderly passer-by. I apologised for the gesture to the latter when he passed as I was parking, but he thought it funny.

Siameasy · 17/07/2022 18:31

Would do the same and have. Hopefully Darwinism will kick in soon

beautyisthefaceisee · 17/07/2022 18:40

"Brats " was nice, in the circumstances!

itsgettingweird · 17/07/2022 18:42

I think you were restrained!

They were being a fucking bunch of brats.

I'm sure they'll be people clamouring on to find a reason right excuse for their behaviour or to say you shouldn't speak about or to kids like that.

But they were being deliberately dangerous and doing it to inconvenience you.

Talkwhilstyouwalk · 19/07/2022 13:29

Sound like little shits! I'd have done the same!

RaggedBlousedPhilanthropist · 19/07/2022 13:49

No, sorry.

If my kid was behaving like that, and at that age, I would hope that someone would give them a loud ticking off as you did.

Jalepenojello · 19/07/2022 13:52

This type of crap is an everyday occurrence in my town 😫 the kids don’t care and neither do most the parents. Don’t worry about it OP.

RaggedBlousedPhilanthropist · 19/07/2022 13:52

I’m not an aggressive parent (I don’t raise my voice very often) but I do think that the “gentle parenting” method often has the same effect as the “couldn’t care less” parenting - ie no respect for others and a feeling that “no one matters but me”.

Occasionally, a short sharp shock of a telling off is necessary.

Lanareyrey · 19/07/2022 14:10

I yell at teenagers all the time so YANBU 🤣

AmyDudley · 19/07/2022 14:11

I would phone the non emergency police number - chances are this won't be the first or last time they mess around like this in this area. It is really dangerous and IMo is only one step away from dropping things off bridges onto cars over the dual carriageway - which can kill people.

carefullycourageous · 19/07/2022 14:25

I do not blame you for swearing and I would not be annoyed if you swore at my child if they were doing that (I would be shocked if mine were doing that).

If it was me I would have probably pulled over, put my hazards on and phoned the Police as what they were doing was deliberate, dangerous and on the highway. You should still report it I think but obviously it is no longer an emergency.

Lizziekisss · 19/07/2022 14:40

They deserved it. You were not being unreasonable.

Flubber88 · 19/07/2022 14:45

YANBU - what a bunch of knobs

Thegreatestshowoff · 19/07/2022 15:23

I think you did the right thing. But then I told off a bunch of louts from the local high school who were blocking a local alleyway used by nursery and primary school children at the start of term last year. Was slightly worried the next day. Worked like a dream and it was like Moses and Red Sea as I walked by, them all telling each other to move out of the way! Sometimes they just need one reasonable adult to remind them of the basics!

SherbertLemonDrop · 19/07/2022 15:44

I've not done that yet, but give me time. My sons that age and his friends are the sweetest boys when they come to my house but my sons told me some stories about them so I know they put on the sweet act for my benefit. My sons probably exactly the same. They are brats! I was an absolute bellend prat at that age 🙈🙈 🤣