To add a parents note to the report?

[Downtheline]

My son has been in school nursery, today they gave out reports. I was pleasantly surprised because I didn't know they bothered for the nursery. I just want to know if there's etiquette about the parents note bit and am I being pfb-ish. My son can write and writes of his own volition at home, it's legible and he holds his pen between his fingers. On the report, under writing it said he has just started mark making and that he needs to build his gross motor strength. I thought they must have meant drawing because I can't get him to draw for love nor money, he hates it. But the art section was separate, and was, as I expected, he gets away from it as quickly as he can. AIBU to put in the parents note bit that he writes at home? Is that very rude to do?

I'm not looking for him to be praised for it but it just feels inaccurate, I'd prefer to understand how he can improve the writing he already does if that makes sense. The rest of the report seems to make sense and the pointers on what to teach him at home are helpful, apart from this bit.

As a practitioner, I can tell you that we can only assess what we see. It's perfectly fine to write down what he does at home but remember this won't always be reflected at nursery, especially if he's not particularly interested in an area of learning. They should be encouraging him to join in all activities but obviously can't make him do so.
If you want them to help your son develop in specific areas then just let them know and they should plan activities that include those skills to build.

I really wouldnt bother he will be starting a fresh class in September where he will be freshly assessed. Dont worry, future employees won't be checking 😁

I had the same last year...brought it up and unfortunate teacher didn't agree. Sometimes they can't see it at that moment in time because they have limited time to observe everything. It's like asking a monkey who can dance to dance at the drop of a hat. I was upset, ignored it and realised my daughter was quite talented when her teacher in reception told me she was one of the smartest in the class.

Gross motor isn't drawing, it's 'big movement' stuff e.g throwing and catching, running, jumping etc. A good foundation in these things feeds into their ability to develop fine motor skills (e.g writing) further down the line (I used to teach early years).

If you think your nursery school aged child is writing legibly and the nursery don't think so then I'd raise that. If they're at nursery and doing more than the alphabet and their name then I'd say that's a tad advanced and would be surprised at the nursery not having noticed that he's writing legibly. When you say he "can write and writes of his own volition at home, it's legible", what exactly can he write? I assume he's not producing sonnets... Repeated letters would be much closer to mark making than writing, even if they're legible.

Also, writing uses fine motor skills, not gross motor strength. If they're saying he needs to develop his gross motor strength for writing purposes then that's very odd - that implies he's struggling to write because of poor posture...

This.

Plus what TheFabledSnake said. Practitioners can only record what they see a child doing at Nursery.

It really doesn't matter.

Pfb a bit, sorry. It's a nursery report it really doesn't matter.

@TRAPPPED

Also, writing uses fine motor skills, not gross motor strength. If they're saying he needs to develop his gross motor strength for writing purposes then that's very odd - that implies he's struggling to write because of poor posture...

I wondered about this too, I'm assuming a typo?

He really likes to write the days of the week on his chalkboard. He doesn't really compose sentences on paper by himself, no. But I have him write his own thank you or family birthday cards by putting dashes down on the paper like hangman and on another piece is the words for reference.

Academically he appears advanced but his gross motor skills are far behind, same with his imagination and creative things. He can’t do what his peers do with running, climbing, skipping and jumping etc. I think he is only ahead with certain things because he enjoys them and it sometimes seems an obsession. It does worry me but I'd read that most children level out in a while so hoping he does.

Thank you for the replies everyone, I think I'll just leave it. He's so excited to play with the other children and toys he's probably never sat down to write there. Glad I asked here first and didn't do the pfb thing.

and on another piece is the words for reference.

*are 🤦‍♀️

Excellent advice - it is not implyi g he can'"t write because of poor posture for example.

Bakewell's post is spot on and I wanted to acknowledge that.

I mean, it's nursery, it's not as if this report is going to be a weight around his neck for the rest of his life!

All children learn at their own pace, if you start to feel that he might need extra help then you can arrange some learning support but don't stress about this too much. You're clearly on the ball so you'll pick anything up in plenty of time for it not to impact him in the long run.

This happened all the time with both my two when they were little, the nursery would proudly say he could do something and I'd think "well yes, he's been able to do that for ages, and quite a bit more". Never said anything though, didn't seem any point - they only report what they see and with lots going on and lots of other kids they're never going to know your child's abilities as well as you do. It doesn't really matter, they get properly assessed when they're older (too much in fact)

It's not rude to write it, but it's not going to go anywhere or make a difference to his education.

Slightly off topic but there is a lot of research to show that gross motor skills in terms of core strength can have a hugely positive impact on fine motor skills. With regards to the report I would also not bother to tell them he writes at home. It will not make them change their report and is irrelevant as the report is based on his school activities.

A nursery report? I really wouldn’t worry and I worry about a lot of things. You know what your dc can do at home and his reception teacher will soon see what they can do too. At nursery they normally focus on how well children play, interact with others etc.

it can be worth checking in, when mine was at 4yo kinder (australia). We were told he was having trouble with pencil grip, ect. My DS is left handed which we did tell them on enrolment, it was missed and they were prompting him to use his right hand. He had no issues after that

I can't state how important this is. I don't know if it's because DS1 has SEN and needed loads of work on his gross motor skills, but I think working on these at his age is far more important. The fine motor skills come later.

As other posters have mentioned, the teachers can only mark what they can evidence.

My son has social anxiety and has selective mutism and is non verbal in school. When marking him, they usually put ' working towards expected' but if they could see what I see, I am sure he would be at the expected level.

A suggestion was for me to video him doing certain things he feels uncomfortable doing at school to use as evidence. For your son's age, I don't think it is needed but you could always drop them a little video showing them a proud mum moment.

He's a preschool child. Is he 3 or 4 years old? Mark making is what he may or may not be doing and that's fine. His fingers and wrists aren't made for writing yet.

Perhaps the early years practitioner knows he does writing at home and is trying to encourage you to let him play in a more appropriate way for his age and stage of development. It's not all about getting them ready to write.

Their shoulders and upper arms need to be strong, from climbing, hanging etc way before you should expect writing skills to develop. And as many people know, if he was in a Scandinavian country he wouldn't be even attempting writing until age 6.

Go and Google bone development in preschool children for writing.

I feel I've been misunderstood. He's 4. I'm really not choosing what he does with his mark making. He is obsessed with numbers and letters, that is his 'play'. I'm not trying to make him write. I love arts and crafts, was looking forward to finger painting, glueing and ripping and drawing with him. When I ask him or try to encourage him to draw he cries. He is happy to just write lists and lists of numbers, again and again. I've printed out dotted pictures to try and encourage him to do something other than writing, he doesn't want to do them. He wants to write, it's fun to him 🤷‍♀️

I'm sad and worried that he doesn't climb and run well. I'm sad that he's not interested in creative things. I took him to the doctor about him not jumping and was told to not worry. He has started jumping now but he was so late with it.

My issue was that he is behind in so much, the one thing he can do isn't acknowledged and it seemed inaccurate to not acknowledge it. I wouldn't have thought he was just starting to make marks in the writing category. Definitely in arts and crafts, but writing no.

However, I understand they might not have seen him do it and that makes me happy. It means he hasn't chosen to write lines and lines of numbers or days of the week or months there, he has gone out and played physically. I'm happy about that.