To ask what your KS2 (neurotypical) child is like at their worst/most challenging

[Clatterbacks]

Having a rough night of it with my 9yo (autism/adhd) and looking for some perspective or to maybe get a grasp on what is normal.
I feel like neurotypical kids are perfect and never have these outbursts at this age.
what’s the worst behaviour you have dealt with?
(no judgement)

I have a NT 9 year old. Does still occasionally have tantrum style meltdowns, although the last one was probably 8 or 9 months ago. When tired will often just cry and cry and cry, and be extremely sensitive to pain, touch, or hurt feelings.

Relentless talk at people with mo consideration for if they are listen/aware that they are being spoken to/ are not occupied with something else.

Fidgeting. Constantly.

Exaggerating perfectly entertaining anecdotes so they turn from interesting (and true) to lies. All in the name of apparent entertainment or self promotion.

Excessive laziness in communal chores/tidying up after themselves. Empty packets left in the cupboard, all towels end up in their room, shoes and socks strewn everywhere. We admonish / make them clear it away, but you'd think by 10yo they'd have learnt to do it without being asked.

Putting the TV on then walking off into another room and doing something else.

Bath left full after use and all clothes and splashed water left in the bathroom (again, sent to clear it away).

DD is 8 so the year below your child. She's NT. Her most recent 'worst' behaviour was when playing with a friend she threw a toy in her face and stormed off, shrieking and yelling because she didn't want to share. After I calmed her down and told her she behaved inappropriately she apologised to her friend and they carried on playing.
She sometimes has grumpy days where she whinges about everything, doesn't know what she wants to eat or do or watch etc and usually it's because she's tired or just needs some cuddles and attention.
Sometimes, but rarely, she throws things in anger or upset, she once hit DH when he picked her up while she was sulking- but knew to apologise.
She has difficult nights where she wants water and a snack and to sit with us downstairs etc, sometimes she ends up sleeping in bed with us.

I think at our children's ages outbursts are to be expected, their behaviour is still that of a childs, not quite a pre-teen. NT children usually have factors affecting their behaviour though like tiredness or highly emotional days so there is no 'perfect' but I suppose their behaviour is often easier to deal with/find a cause for.

My 9yr old dd can be awful. No violence luckily but she says awful things, loses her temper in a heartbeat, says she doesn’t want to be alive any more, goes off on looooong rants, says she is the worst child in the world, she’s stupid, nobody loves her… it’s very draining!! She’s extremely impatient about everything and hates asking for help or waiting for help to arrive! She also refuses to sleep all night in her own bed, so has to come in with me or her siblings, saying she’s scared. Convinces herself she has nits/worms/eczema so will arrive in my room in the middle of the night demanding to be checked. Very rude to me in front of others sometimes. Messy and constantly needs to be reminded to pick up after herself. Hates being rushed yet doesn’t listen when I countdown until I get to last 5 mins then loses her temper again and rushes round crying because she can’t find x/y/z (Particularly school mornings!!!) None of this is new although has got worse with age.

On the flip side she can be very loving, extremely creative, kind to her peers, hilarious, a great dinner companion! I think she was designed to be an only child and struggles sharing me with her siblings. I do try to carve out 1-1 time as much as possible before anyone comes at me 🤓

Almost 10 y old is stroppy, argumentative and gets screamy when angry. Is a problem solver but will refuse to look at something in a different way when faced with something that "doesn't work". Throws things. Shouts and cries. Afterwards is very loving, teary and apologetic.

This has made me feel a bit more normal. Last night was unusually awful. She got upset over something I asked her to do and ended up throwing a little stool across the room, she swore and kicked a wall.
I just despair. That’s like once a year behaviour for her but it’s so awful.