Fed up of this

[whywhywhyH]

My NDN is I think a CF and I’m fed up of it.

I think my mistake in the past was being a ‘yes person’ so I didn’t set boundaries but at the start I didn’t have any inclination she was like this. Small favours like could she borrow something/could I pick something up when I went shopping/babysit occasionally was all fine.

My life has got a lot busier recently so I haven’t been able to accommodate some of the requests but it’s clear that that’s not acceptable to her. She asked me last night if I could have her dc after school but I have a meeting-she’s told me tearfully how I’ve ‘let her down’ and could I reschedule my meeting !!!!

Why are people like this ??!!! Surely if you ask a favour you know there’s a 50/50 chance of a yes or no !!!

Bloody hell , just ignore her. If you can’t help you can’t help
she could always reschedule what she’d planned and ensure she has child care in place first , like most people have to
harsh but true

Stand your ground and don't let her make you feel guilty. If you give an inch she will take a mile. I hope you told her how inappropriate her comment was that you let her down. It would make me really cross to hear her sense of entitlement and would put me off to do her any future favours

With some people, the more you give, the more they expect. I learnt this through being too accommodating to people who ended up taking the piss massively.
You NDN is definitely one of these people. Just say sorry I am.no longer in a position to help you, and shut the door on her

Wow I’ve never asked a favour off my ndn other than parking in my drive when I’m away. It isn’t normal behaviour.

I think I'd be pissing myself with laughter fair in her face at her melodrama and self centredness. Perhaps sympathetically say it's so difficult to get good help these days, but now she knows how unreliable you are, she knows she needs to find an alternative source of assistance?

As someone else has said when favours are given often it becomes the status quo and then if less favours are done that kind of becomes a negative. Like you are taking away from an even balance even though the balance wasn't even.

I have had it several times before. They are genuinely shocked and surprised when you push back.

Say no and remain much less available.

Yes - I think I’ve set myself up for this !!! I actually in general like helping people out if I can but it’s just got to a demand stage rather than asking