To be frustrated by how mundane life is

[Olive180]

When I was younger I was determined NOT to have a mundane, plodding along, cul-de-sac life. But aged 35 I'm poor and stuck renting a pokey flat in the arse end of nowhere. I've worked very hard and have a decent job, but not much chance of progressing much further in my career now. All I do is watch TV, listen to podcasts and read books, go running and swimming. I can't really afford to do much else. I'm feeling pretty hacked off and frustrated. I thought adult life would offer choices and freedom.

Aibu? How do you cope with the reality of the mundanity of life? And coming to an acceptance you'll never have the life you'd want?

There’s always something you can do.

save and go travelling
move cities and jobs

Take up new hobbies
change career
make new friends
learn new skills
volunteer
stop doing stuff you don’t want to do
challenge your norms

I think it is enjoying the simple things. Nature, nice food, family time, music, helping others, etc. I once read a quote that said 'throughout history most people have led relatively short miserable lives'. That struck a chord with me and I realise I have it luckier than many in history or cross culturally. I try not to get too bogged down thinking what the point is etc. Mindfulness helps. I watch a lot of TV but that's ok. Whatever gets you through the day.. escapism..

What did you want to do when you were younger eg travel?
Would volunteering be an option for a completely different experience. You could use annual leave to volunteer.
Is your job one you could do anywhere or one you could easily come back to.
If you are single and renting you don’t have ties to keep you.

I think 35 is too young to decide that you'll never have the life you want. You might have realised that you won't be an international footballer or whatever, but changing jobs, travel, moving to another country, are all within your grasp.

I'd move. You can work from anywhere in some jobs. I'm just back from Sicily and there are so many exciting and vibrant places to explore. It really struck me that if I was young Palermo was the kind of place I'd have loved to live in. Go while you still can if there's any way you can!

And if it's any consolation I was married with two kids and no career at 35. Unhappily married. I then got divorced and left to bring up the kids myself. That wasn't how I thought my adulthood would go at all!

Move. By 35 I’d lived longterm in five countries. If I got bored, a new culture/language/life was just the thing.

You are 35, not 85. Don't become old before you need to.
You can do whatever you want.

There's a million and one things to do. It's up to YOU to go find them.

As my grandfather said, if you're bored it's because you are boring.