To think this isn’t safe?

[Curlywurlybar]

Hi everyone!

my MIL has arranged for us to go to longleat on Saturday. It’s been arranged for a while and she originally told us she’d booked the tickets and the bus, I originally thought this meant the bus around the park to see all the animals instead of using our cars but I’ve realised now she means the coach from a local pick up point to take us there and back.

We have 2 DC… DS1 who is 22months and DS2 who is 3 months. AIBU to think it’s completely unsafe to put the babies on a coach on a motorway? I don’t even understand how it would work. I presume we could fit DS2s baby carrier car seat onto the coach chair but we definitely couldn’t with DS1s isofix… there’s no way he’ll sit still on a chair with a seat belt on, but even if he did, it’s still incredibly unsafe to do so? DS1 is currently in a rear facing isofix seat and has never travelled forward, let alone with no seat at all?

I really want us to drive in our own car and meet them there but DH thinks his mum will be really disappointed as she’d booked the bus so we could spend the whole day together…I’m not willing to compromise the DCs safety but don’t want to cause a problem either… AIBU to think this just isn’t safe?

You need a car seat to provide impact protection and to stop them getting thrown around by impact. The structure of a coach is such that the whole thing provides impact protection. And it is much less likely to end up on its roof or side that a car. In essence unless you are hit by another coach or hgv any car will absorb most of the impact leaving 5he coach relatively unscathed.

So being in a coach without a car seat is safer than being in a car with one. Stats are all one the gov website.

This is what national express say about children under 3

"Yes, children under 3 years of age may travel free of charge (one per full fare paying adult).

We strongly recommend that you bring a child car seat appropriate to your child's age however responsibility to fit the seat will remain with you. When bringing a child car seat please make sure your child is included on your ticket booking.:

So worth checking with the coach company.

Is there really a need for snarky comments just because op wants to keep her children as safe as she can? She just wanted to know if it's safe to travel without a car seat and at that age, regardless of the mode of transport, no its not. In even a small collision they could be thrown into the seat in front. Not a life threatening injury but still not pleasant for the child so why not try to avoid it?

Does it have isofix and aircon? No way would my baby be in a vehicle without a rear facing car seat and ours is isofix only . And I wouldn't want him travelling in a vehicle without aircon in hot weather either, it'd make him feel like shit.

It'll also take you longer, and you'll have to transfer the car seat back to your car, it'll be loud, you won't be able to have toilet breaks, they'll be less likely to sleep, you have to come back when you're told. No way would I go on a coach trip when I can drive.

Car seats aren’t actually required on a coach but if they have a 3 point harness they can be fitted.
lapband then no they can’t. Most coaches have temperature control and aircon,

coach is safer than car.

you’ll also save on petrol costs

Go by coach, take the car seats, thank your MIL for arranging a lovely family day out. She's not being controlling either, asking for food preferences, she's being thoughtful.

What @helpfulperson said is right - even without a child seat, a coach is safer than a car.

Do no parents with young children ever travel by bus?! I've never seen parents lugging car seats on and off buses before so why would a coach be different? You just have the kids on your laps, like pp said the chances of a high impact collision in a coach are so low

Your MIL has probably booked a certain number of seats and just told them x adults and x children.

Find out the name of the coach company, ring them up and ask their advice.

Used to go on the bus all the time with my baby when I lived in London. Was not unsafe. It’s a different situation to being in a car.

Definitely check with the coach company. They might have rules about this and if MIL hasn’t told them the ages of your dc it could be a problem.

DC or no DC, who wants to be on a coach when you’ve got a car? I bet the other passengers would prefer it if you took your babies in the car as well. If your DH is so desperate to go on the coach then tell him he can go and you’ll drive.

I still remember when my dad took me to longleat in a heatwave and how unbearably hot it was(30 years ago!) … with two small ones I wouldn’t be going anywhere like that with the temps they’re predicting

When you arrive there, you will have all the car seats and general clobber that goes with kids to carry around with you all day! As opposed to bringing your own car and being able to leave all the stuff in your car.

... and you can negotiate with the monkeys on the way out to get your wipers/hub caps/chrome trim etc. back! 🐒🐒🐒

No def not safe without car seats, take your own car.

I don't know about safety but I flew with a 22 month old on my lap and it was like wrestling with a chimpanzee. It's different with a baby that isn't yet mobile.

The nursery I used to work for took a trio on a coach. Each child had their car seat and were strapped in.
I would email the coach company and ask them.

Every day millions of people in the UK travel on buses with no seat belts, including the driver. We even have special buses put on for children to go to school where they are free to roam about. Yet there is no carnage with people shooting out the front screen every few miles.

If safety is your first concern, your child is safer on the coach than in your private car.