Lost my best friend

[Laurenk96]

My best friend has been on and off with a guy that is the biggest twat in the world! He’s a narcissistic fuck boy and thinks he owns her! He’s dumped her by text 3 times in the past month, no matter what I say to her to try and make her realise she’s so much better off without him she just doesn’t listen! So 3 days ago she promised me she won’t be going back to him, then he starts messaging her again and I said if you get back with him I’m blocking you on FB and won’t support her decision, I didn’t say it to be a dick to her I said it to make her realise that she doesn’t need him, so she decided to go round his house and get back with him the day after I say that to her, so I blocked her as I wanted to prove I meant what I said, she messaged me on whatsapp saying please don’t block me, and that’s the last message I’ve had from her haven’t heard anything since, am I in the wrong for being angry and upset that she’s chosen him over me? She hasn’t been the greatest friend at times but yet I still do everything to make her happy and I care about her so much but right now I just want to walk away because I feel so hurt

She’s no friend. You don’t need this drama in your life. Block and ignore.

If you valued your friendship you would be there for her without judgement.

I think you've learned a life lesson about the futility of ultimatums.

Erm no you are the one who is no friend. You blocked her cos she didn’t listen to you and she’s back with a manipulative narcissist. Who do you think wins here? Him. He gets to carry on hurting her with no one to look out for her.

You can express your concerns and disappointment whilst having boundaries about how much you are drawn into the shitstorm she is entangled in.

If she keeps going back to a narcissist who treats her like utter shit it’s obvious she has really low self worth and self esteem.

Any good friend, especially a best friend, would be there for her no matter what. Blocking her and not responding to her messages will just lower her self worth even more.

I can completely understand your frustration, and you will only want the best for her. But to block her is not the solution here.

I imagine you made this threat in the heat of the moment without real consideration of the consequences and you feel as though you have to follow it through now. It was a silly thing to do.

As a PP has said, neither of you win this - he does.

You're wrong to block her. How are you lot best friends if you block her for following her heart? So what if its the wrong decision but its HER decision not your's ! You could if told her don't talk to me about him simple, but no you gave an ultimatum. Thats what narcissists do.

It's her decision to make, I thought friends was about supporting each other and being there when everything goes to shit. No blackmailing your friends and making situations probably already hard even harder.

You have not gone about this the right way