To ask for your tips to get my evenings back!

[HungryandIknowit]

I have an 8m old baby who I'm co-sleeping with. She feeds to sleep or if she is full will only sleep with me cuddling her (on me). She wakes approx every 3 - 4 hours to feed, which I'm fine with, but if I'm not in the bed she wakes after 40 mins and gets really upset. I'd like my evenings back! Please share your tips for getting a couple of hours in the evening to make and have dinner etc.

Cot in the living room for in the evenings, then carry her upstairs when you’re ready for bed?

It's hard, I remember feeling the same. I think I started feeling like I had some sort of evening back after about 10 months BUT I gave up co sleeping to achieve this which is perhaps not what you want to hear, I don't know.

I found, once he'd cracked it, he actually slept miles better in his own bed and in his own room but we did have to do the dreaded sleep training. Bedtime routine, down in the cot, leave for 5 mins, go in and console and so on... Tbf it genuinely only took him a few days to manage to sleep on his own and now at 18 months he goes down wide awake and falls asleep all by himself at 7:30 and stays that way until 7:30am!

It's amazing when you do finally start to get some life back but I did have to do some things I perhaps thought I never wanted to do to get there.

This. Or carry cot next to you on the sofa.

What happens when you go in after 40 mins?

I remember with DS I would go back in, spend about 20 minutes feeding him back to sleep then sneak out again.

Over time he started to sleep longer and longer until now when he rarely wakes before morning.

I would say carry on as you are, baby will start sleeping for longer and you will get your evenings back.

Small cot eg ikea sniglar by side of your bed, feed baby to sleep, transfer to cot after 20 mins, when they wake soothe with your voice or hand through bars rather than co-sleeping or picking up, eventually ours chilled out to sleep through in cot, then you can use baby monitor to get your evenings and eventually move the cot out.
Good luck!

Wait till she's older.

Seriously, I've ebf 3dc, youngest is now 15m and I can get a couple of hours most evenings (teething and bugs aside).

Would she sleep next to you on the sofa?- depending on whether yours is squidgy of course. Ive done this with all of ours (we have a hard sofa, no cushions, so no suffocation risk)

She will grow out of it - it is hard to wait for sometimes

Stop co-sleeping would be the obvious one.

Do you want your evenings back for you or because you feel you 'have' to? An 8-month old is exhausting - I'd just enjoy the early nights and go to sleep when she sleeps.
This phase shall pass.

I just kept leaving mine in bed on their own once they were asleep. DS took a lot longer to get sleeping on his own but younger DD actually started sleeping longer without me.
so I fed to sleep in double bed and left baby there, either went downstairs or to sleep in another bed. make sure they are warm enough, I used a fleece babygrow and gradually the length of time grew. It’s a bit two steps forward one back but it doesn’t involve leaving to cry. Does take a few weeks

I can usually cuddle her back to sleep - she doesn't usually want a feed at that point. She tends to reach out for me during the night and if i move away she moves so that she's touching me. Maybe she'll grow out of it (hopefully)!

Mainly so I can have something to eat! Otherwise I'm going to bed pretty early, which is great.

Thanks all for the tips and your own experiences.