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AIBU?

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Original poster

Your baby will be a boy

28 replies

Andthelivingiseasy · 05/07/2022 23:28

Was thinking about/remembering this today

When I was pregnant with my Dd, now 3, one of my best friends kept going on and on about how I’d have a boy and how my baby would definite be a boy and she couldn’t see me with a girl etc etc
We found out pretty early it was a girl and I knew in my heart I’d have a girl.
She’s joked in the past about girl mums and boy mums…what was she meaning? I felt like she was almost implying I wasn’t the ‘Feminine type, if that makes sense

OP posts:
Original poster
Andthelivingiseasy · 05/07/2022 23:28

*Definitely be a boy

OP posts:
UmbrellaSparrow · 05/07/2022 23:34

If it bothers you that much, ask your friend?

It was three years ago. Honestly, let the throw away comments go.

ManateeFair · 05/07/2022 23:36

Given that she’s one of your best friends, why can’t you just ask her?

HerTableLaid · 05/07/2022 23:37

She sounds like a remarkably silly person.

JaninaDuszejko · 05/07/2022 23:38

She’s joked in the past about girl mums and boy mums…what was she meaning?

Does it matter, something stupid and sexist no doubt. What does she think about those of us who have boys and girls? Clearly we are the best (biased).

HowdoIphrasethis · 07/07/2022 10:30

Do she think you aren’t feminine or something, sorry, I don’t know what she could be implying that she can’t see you with a girl?

Maybebabyno2 · 07/07/2022 10:36

I don't know, I was sure my friend was having a boy based on an old wife's tale of the shape of her bump. She didn't find out the sex so it was just a fun guess. I don't know what she is meaning about girl mum/boy mum thing but when I have heard it in real life, it is more about them AFTER the kids have grown up a bit and how they parent as opposed to being about their femininity.

MiniPiccolo · 07/07/2022 10:38

HerTableLaid · 05/07/2022 23:37

She sounds like a remarkably silly person.

So does the OP to give it any head space.

Smogtopia · 07/07/2022 10:42

I experienced exactly this. What I later realised was the 'friend' in question had deep longing for a daughter and only had a son. So they were projecting and almost manifesting that they'd see me with a son and not be envious of my daughter. Batshit I know... could this be the case in your scenario?

x2boys · 07/07/2022 10:44

People come out with all kinds of shite ,when they are talking to pregnant women or women who have just given birth I wouldn't give it to much head space .

Cocacolacazza · 07/07/2022 10:49

Meh. I've got two boys. I couldn't picture myself having a girl. Based purely on a largely dysfunctional relationship between me and my own mother. Doesn't mean anything bad about myself or girls when I think that.

I still remember someone saying I wasn't very maternal when I told them I was pregnant. That was a decade ago. Given that they only saw me at work when I was barking orders at people in life in death situations, I don't think many people came across as maternal in that job TBH.

RainbowCrayons · 07/07/2022 11:10

I was told I was a perfect boy mum because I know a lot about dinosaurs. Only problem with that is that I learnt all those facts as a child because (shock horror) girls can like dinosaurs too. I think it reinforces the stereotype that boys need outdoorsy fun mums and girls all want shopping trips and manicures with mum (I happen to like all of the above!)

Saying that, I did have a really strong feeling DS would be a boy almost as soon as I got a positive test but I would have been just as happy with either.

SatinHeart · 07/07/2022 11:13

x2boys · 07/07/2022 10:44

People come out with all kinds of shite ,when they are talking to pregnant women or women who have just given birth I wouldn't give it to much head space .

This. People just feel they need to make conversation about it but then can't think of anything original and end up coming out with all kinds of socially awkward crap.

Cakecakecheese · 07/07/2022 11:29

A few people said I'd be having a girl because I like pink things 🤦🏼‍♀️ I'm having a boy.

KyaClark · 07/07/2022 11:38

Cocacolacazza · 07/07/2022 10:49

Meh. I've got two boys. I couldn't picture myself having a girl. Based purely on a largely dysfunctional relationship between me and my own mother. Doesn't mean anything bad about myself or girls when I think that.

I still remember someone saying I wasn't very maternal when I told them I was pregnant. That was a decade ago. Given that they only saw me at work when I was barking orders at people in life in death situations, I don't think many people came across as maternal in that job TBH.

Someone at work told me I'd be a shit mum. It's always stuck with me.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 07/07/2022 13:10

Her thinking is about as reliable and meaningful as you 'knowing in your heart' you were having a girl.

Honestly don't know why you've even remembered it let alone giving it any headspace!

Ducksinthebath · 07/07/2022 13:13

People talk a load of shit, ignore it. And no, you did not “feel in your heart” it was a girl, unless your heart is very good at sonography and has all the relevant kit hiding under the ribs.

AtrociousCircumstance · 07/07/2022 13:17

She was talking shit, and she was trying to let you know she has an opinion about you with regards to gender bullshit.

She sounds like a numbnut.

HowdoIphrasethis · 07/07/2022 15:35

@AtrociousCircumstance What opinion though? I don’t get this post

HauntingScream · 07/07/2022 15:41

I had similar from 2 different friends. One made the boy mum jokes and how I could only ever be a boy mum and another said 'I'd like to say that you're pregnant with a girl, but I just know you're having another boy'
It was odd and I also think they were 'manifesting' and for whatever reason, were hoping I wouldn't have a girl. Confused

Wouldloveanother · 07/07/2022 15:48

Massively over thinking OP

Meraas · 07/07/2022 15:51

I think she was being quite unkind.

Is she still a friend and what did she say when you had a girl?

Original poster
Andthelivingiseasy · 07/07/2022 17:08

@Meraas What was she implying?

We’re not that close anymore tbh, I felt I put more effort into things so pulled back a bit.

She offered the normal congratulations when my Dd was born, but generally barely ever asked after her

OP posts:
Original poster
Andthelivingiseasy · 07/07/2022 17:09

@AtrociousCircumstance What opinion is that?

OP posts:
Original poster
Andthelivingiseasy · 07/07/2022 17:10

@Ducksinthebath There were many reasons I thought/knew it was a girl, but very personal due to past losses and as crazy as it sounds, a reading from
someone who was spot on

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