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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask would you stay in this situation??

12 replies

Hifive98 · 04/07/2022 17:55

Feelings for FWB of 2 months. Amazing sex, cuddles, kisses but no commitment. Would you stay?

OP posts:
Walkingalot · 04/07/2022 17:59

No because you'll end up hurt and more so the longer it goes on.
Is it worth mentioning it to him in case he might be feeling the same way?

LostInDating · 04/07/2022 17:59

Depends what you are after, two months is still a short period of time in my opinion, but the longer you stay in this situationship then more hurt you gonna be later. If you are ready for relationship then you should tell him about it and maybe become official??If he says he doesn’t want to than leave him - he might realise what he lost and come back asking you to be together. If he replaces you with another girl then you can move on too..

SillyLittleBiscuit · 04/07/2022 18:01

Stay in a FWB situation when you want more and the other person doesn’t? No.

Hifive98 · 04/07/2022 18:07

Thank you. And I guess would you stay if you knew the other person had feelings but you did not?

OP posts:
BiscoffSundae · 04/07/2022 18:09

You’ve asked this before, this is a guy who you have feelings for and you can’t understand why he still sleeps with you when you have feelings and he doesn’t, you’ve had loads of answers as to why the top one being he gets to have sex! Answers won’t change also it’s not “staying” with someone if there is no relationship

FinallyHere · 04/07/2022 18:13

would you stay if you knew the other person had feelings but you did not?

I like to think that I am a decent person and would not stay in the situation. I'm afraid to say that there are lots of people who don't care that they do not reciprocate their partners feelings, so long as they get to continue to have sex on tap.

They are unlikely to remain faithful to that person who loves them, why would they?

FlissyPaps · 04/07/2022 18:14

If you want a relationship but they don’t - I’d walk away.

Sex, kisses and cuddles doesn’t mean they like you.

AllFreeOwls · 04/07/2022 18:15

If one is catching feelings they need to walk away.

Hifive98 · 04/07/2022 18:16

The sad thing is I don’t think a relationship would work. We are at different stages in life, age gap. I’m a single parent and he has a son in his late teens but I have very strong feelings for him.

OP posts:
10HailMarys · 04/07/2022 18:18

Haven't you asked about your FWB situation before? Loads of questions about 'He knows I have feelings for him and he says he worries that he is using me, but then he still sleeps with me so what does that mean?'

I know you want people to tell you that he must care about you if he knows you have feelings for him and still sleeps with you. But he doesn't.

The answer is the same as it's always been: he still doesn't care about you and he is still sleeping with you because you make yourself available and he doesn't always have a better offer.

10HailMarys · 04/07/2022 18:20

Hifive98 · 04/07/2022 18:16

The sad thing is I don’t think a relationship would work. We are at different stages in life, age gap. I’m a single parent and he has a son in his late teens but I have very strong feelings for him.

Your feelings for him are irrelevant because you're not in a relationship with him and he doesn't want one. Have some self-respect and walk away.

ThirtyThreeTrees · 04/07/2022 18:26

No - FWB only works if neither of you want a relationship.

As soon as that dynamic changes on either side, you need to end it as someone will always get hurt or feel used.

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