AIBU or is this really really rude?

[Niceeyes]

we have a little dog, we live on a small estate where everyone has their own private garden but we also have a communal garden that everyone uses. We came home yesterday afternoon to a (what looks like a nappy bag) full of dog poo hung on our front door, no note, just the poo!

we are very responsible owners and always clear up after our dog. I would be mortified if anyone thought we hadn’t picked up after her. She barely uses the communal garden as we take her out to woods, parks etc.

There are 3 other dog neighbours. Why didnt it get hung on their door? We have a group what’s app and I was going to ask who hung the bag of poo and please pm me, but then I don’t like confrontation and I didn’t want all the neighbours to pull up their chair with popcorn to watch the what’s app arguments start.

I think it would have been courteous to leave a note with an explanation as to why it’s been hung on our door. Now I’m looking at all the neighbours thinking ‘was it you?!’

I feel like the moment for me to say anything has passed, there are only one couple with young children who would use nappie bags so I think it must be them but then again it could be one of those little toilet bin bags.

any suggestions or advice?
TIA

I’d throw the bag back into the communal gardens, what CF’s.

Can you put a note on your door for the next time? As they're likely to keep doing it. Are you sure your other half is as reliably conscientious as you?

I would have to say something on the group.

I think I would have to message and ask if anyone had seen someone hanging dog poo on my door and that I was quite upset as I always pick up after my dog.

I’d hate for anyone to think I left dog poo around, it’s a disgusting thing to do.

re the nappy bags, plenty of dog owners buy them as they work out cheaper than actual dog poo bags, which are thicker plastic, so it may not be the ones with the DC.

Get a ring doorbell.

You should say something in the group.

’Hi everyone, there seems to have been a misunderstanding, someone has hung a plastic bag of dog poo on our front door, presumably thinking it was from our dog. It definitely wasn’t our dog, we always ensure we bag it up and bin it. We’ve binned the bag of course and we are happy to clear up any misunderstandings in person.’

Also, get a video bell.

What @eldora says. If you don't say anything they will think it's you, plus hopefully it might make the other dog owners think better if it was them.

I'm a dog owner myself and I can confirm that contrary to the old saying, the English are not a nation of dog lovers, in fact I've endured the same unreasonable behaviours on a number of occasions, I had one particularly hostile neighbour show me a turd which a baby elephant have been proud of and claiming that my little staffy had deposited it...her embarrassment when she took a look at the actual size of my dog was hilarious, on another occasion I was addressed about "a solid week of barking" another neighbour had "endured" till I informed her that my dog and I had actually been staying in London with my sister on those dates, the list is endless.

Definitely put something on the a WhatsApp group.

Are you sure, sure, SURE 100% your partner wouldn't have left a cheeky one on the grass if they thought no-one was looking?

I would put a message on the group WhatsApp asking if anyone saw someone hang the bag on your door handle as you'd like to return it.

Exactly this.

I would put a polite letter communal letter through everyones door asking the person who did this anonymous poo drop to contact you so it can be discussed and say that you always clean up after your dog everytime.
Please supply photos of the alleged offence or I am afraid I will have to call the police to investigate.
Get a CCTV camera.
Bullying neighbours did this to me - I put up a camera when they were out and filmed them then reported it to the police - they slung cat poo at my front door so it was all over my door and front door step.
Then I reported the woman to her hospital trust and she was disciplined - she was a health visitor!! And also a nasty piece of work.

Check with your household that it definitely wasn't anyone in your family who didn't pick the poo up and then send the message. You might not like confrontation but it's nicer than having dog poo hung from your door.

Great idea!

No, checked with DH, not him. He is so particular he practically follows the dog with bag in hand ready to catch it 😂
Ring doorbell a good idea.
everyone seems like a smiling assassin to me today!
if they do it again, I’ll post on the what’s app…it really did upset me as I’m not careless when it comes to looking after /picking up after our dog.

DH checked the contents of the bag this evening 🤢. It looks like fox poo, half tempted to do a DNA on it then post on what’s app!

I misunderstood this at first … I was thinking “OMG, who doesn’t know their partner well enough to rule this out?!” 😂

I'd put on the WhatsApp something along the lines of....

I was upset to come home yesterday to a bag of fox poo on my door. Im a responsible dog owner who always picks up my dogs poo but I have to say i don't pick up fox poo so please don't leave it on my gate again. Thank you.

If its fox poo you'd REALLY know about it, that stuff stinks.

I would be on the local whatsapp group if you have one, being absolutely crystal clear that it isn't you, and that passive aggressive moves like that are not the way to resolve an issue anyway, so whoever did it needs to belt up and behave themselves.

And get a Ring doorbell so you're never stuck for a mystery delivery, be it poo, dead bat or whatever... :)

You could post on the group saying that you have found someone has left fox poo in a bag on your door and it's upsetting and if it continues it'll be treat as harassment and be reported to the police. I wonder if someone will pipe up saying it wasn't fox poo therefore identifying the culprit 🤔

I had to stop DP doing This in anger once as a dog repeatedly pooped on our doorstep! I convinced him he couldn't be sure who it was (although I think we probably did know).

I'd definitely bring it up in a nice classy way - it's an opportunity to be the bigger person and the dog owner who isn't picking up will see it and feel terrible (hopefully!). Can't stand people who don't pick up after their dog

100% this

I took all your advice and I posted on the group what’s app - asked if anyone knew who left a bag on my front door (didn’t say poo as the culprit knows exactly what’s in it), I asked the person in question to PM me.

I started ti get messsges on the group app from everyone saying ‘not me’ ‘not us sorry!’ Etc etc.
do by process of elimination and the fact it was out in a nappy bag, the only people who didn’t respond (yes they read the message) is the couple with smell kids. Absolute knobs.
People who are ballsy enough to hang a bag of poo on my door but no balls to put a note with it or even pm me to explain why it was out there.

Good on you OP for having the balls to confront the WhatsApp group.

I agree with PPs, put up a camera/ring doorbell.

Hopefully though, now all the estate knows, the “poo hanger uppers” in question will refrain from doing it to someone else in future.

asked if anyone knew who left a bag on my front door

I would have added “because the contents weren’t ours”.
It now looks like you object to it being left but you aren’t disputing it’s yours so they will still feel justified for doing it.