To think my neighbour is a CF?

[guerrillagirl]

So my next door neighbour has been asking for a constant stream of favours from my DH since we recently moved in. We are both married with DC. She got hold of my DH’s contact and is constantly asking him to do little menial jobs for her like DIY, borrowing books etc. It seems like she’s asking for stuff every few days! He wants to be on good terms with them but he is getting pretty fed up. He has a full time job FFS! I think it’s particularly suspect that she’s asking him and not me (maybe she knows I will say no - or worse has an ulterior motive?). My DH finds her quite annoying and I do trust him. But she’s got him running about like he’s her staff and it’s really pissing me off. Is this normal neighbour behaviour and I’m a grumpy mare, or is she being a CF?

YANBU but yr DH needs to grow a pair and politely tell her to fuck off

She's being a CF, but your DH needs to tell her no.

It's really difficult because you don't really want to fall out with your neighbours but she is being very cheeky.

Maybe if she wants to borrow something he could refer her to you.
If she wants a job doing then he needs to tell her that he's a bit busy at the moment and suggests she asks someone else ( like her own husband maybe?)

When your husband does these jobs, is her husband around?

Where is her DH and why isn't he doing these things for her?

Get him to change his number and don’t give her the new one. She can f*ck off.

Why on earth isn’t he just saying no?! That is weird.

He needs to block her number.

Weird. He should just start taking longer to reply

As in a few days, to a week. To never

'oh, sorry I missed this.' But not actually answering the question.

He should give her the check a trade leaflet next time she knocks 😒

He needs to stop responding. She will get the message, eventually

How did she get his number?

My immediate thought would be is there something going on. But as you trust him etc, then it probably isn't that.

Could it be that she's got a bit of a crush on him?

Or she's just a total odd ball!

But yes, get him to just totally ignore the messages.

He could say he's got a new number but no doubt she would keep asking for it.

"Sorry, I am not able to help you with all these tasks. I work a full time job and we are busy with our DC and having recently moved in I have so much stuff to do in my own home that all my time and energy has to focus on my own home and family"

“Sorry I’m busy this week, hope you manage to find someone who can do that for you.”

He needs to take a while to reply then politely say no. Being on good terms doesn't mean being a mug.

He needs to say no or just ignore.

Sounds like he may be enjoying being a rescuer. Or he is just wet.

I've been living on my own for nearly 5 years and I've only asked my neighbours to water my garden for a few days once as just planted new plants (I feed their cats so don't feel bad) and to park in my drive when I'm away (they have more cars than parking space so it's not a problem.

Some of my friends' husbands have helped me out a couple of times when I first moved in (light fittings and hanging a mirror up) but that has been at my friends instigation.

How did she get hold of his 'contact' and why isn't he telling her no?

Of course it's not normal unless you live in a Ronnie Corbett sketch.
Can't he just say "sorry I can't do that" or do that thing plumbers are good at, he could just look at the problem, suck his teeth, take ages to say, "ooh, no, I think you need to get a handyman on that one."
Or he could be a CF back and invoice her labour, parts (if any) and call-out fee.
Also don't lend her anything she sounds like the sort who will hold onto it until it suits her to get more attention to give it back (or never, if she finds someone more people-pleasing to milk for attention).

She is a CF.

But your DH needs to be the one to tell her no.

Either he blocks her number, comes up with reasons why he can't help or tells her the truth - that he's too busy and doesn't want to help!

Why can't her own DH do the jobs?

Your DH just needs to say no.
He doesn’t have to be rude but can just say he’s busy.

Of course she’s going to keep asking if he keeps doing it - why wouldn’t she.

I’m a single parent and I’ve never asked any neighbours for any favours.