Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is rude of him

33 replies

Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 20:29

Hi all

I am seeing somebody and I am due to see him on Saturday. I whatsapped him to confirm plans and he has read my message earlier tonight and not responded but he is online. I’m feeling anxious now

OP posts:
GreatCrash · 30/06/2022 20:31

No, I don't think it's rude yet. Hopefully he'll reply later tonight!

bro101 · 30/06/2022 20:31

Does he have kids? Maybe something has happened and he is messaging them / their mum?

An emergency with his parents?

ManateeFair · 30/06/2022 20:34

I don’t reply to everyone’s messages straight away. I have other stuff to do. My top priority for replying wouldn’t be someone confirming details for a date that was still two days ago. I’d reply when I had a spare moment or time to do it properly.

I personally don’t think that’s rude. I do think it’s rude to expect people to drop everything immediately to reply to a non-urgent message.

Blankel · 30/06/2022 20:37

No, it's not rude to not immediately respond to someone in a non-urgent situation. There are a million reasons why - he might be busy, his phone battery might've cut out half-way through responding and he hasn't got his charger, he was driving and couldn't respond...

Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 20:39

Yes just worried because he is online but not replied to me

OP posts:
Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 20:39

Thank you for your replies

OP posts:
MolliciousIntent · 30/06/2022 20:39

Not everyone replies instantly. He might be busy. Or just doing something else. Calm down.

PurpleDaisies · 30/06/2022 20:40

When did you make the plans?

Its rude to expect an immediate reply. He hasn’t done anything wrong.

Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 20:40

The plans were made on Tuesday

OP posts:
coffeecupsandfairylights · 30/06/2022 20:40

What did your message say? Does it require an immediate response?

Aquamarine1029 · 30/06/2022 20:41

He might not actually be online, and why is it rude to not immediately reply? He might be busy, fgs. I assume he's a grown up and not a teenager.

ilovesooty · 30/06/2022 20:41

I'm sure he'll respond. He doesn't have to reply straight away.

Cantanka · 30/06/2022 20:42

I understand your anxiety about it but whatever you do, do not send a chaser or let on you’ve dwelled on this! I’m sure he will reply 😀

ilovesooty · 30/06/2022 20:43

If you made the plans on Tuesday but you aren't seeing him until Saturday why do they need to be confirmed at this point?

Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 20:56

I’m just confused because it has shown that he has been online for ages yet still no response. I was checking as I am a single parent so was arranging for childcare as it was planned for me to be staying over at his house

OP posts:
coffeecupsandfairylights · 30/06/2022 20:59

Call him if it's important.

Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 21:11

Thanks I just feel anxious about it

OP posts:
Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 21:16

He has gone offline but no reply so wondered that he’s changed his mind

OP posts:
worriedandannoyed · 30/06/2022 21:18

If he was online for ages on WhatsApp it could be that he was on the phone. Give him a chance to reply, try not to worry x

Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 21:20

@worriedandannoyed thank you. This is also my worry that he was chatting to another woman on the phone

OP posts:
LaFloristaCalista · 30/06/2022 21:20

If you overthink everything so much, you are going to find dating very difficult

ilovesooty · 30/06/2022 21:24

Have you any reason to imagine he's talking to another woman?

Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 21:24

Yes I do find it hard. I suffer with anxiety but he knows about this

OP posts:
Original poster
Mintoreoo · 30/06/2022 21:26

I don’t really have any reason to think it @ilovesooty. He has told me before not to overthink things and that I don’t need to worry but I can’t help it.

Im just worried because he has gone offline without responding which has made me think he doesn’t want to see me but isn’t communicating that to me

OP posts:
Haudyourwheesht · 30/06/2022 21:26

Does he have children? Maybe they were on his phone.

Swipe left for the next trending thread