Our oldest DD developed an eating disorder 2 years ago, when she was 14. It was during a covid lockdown and she became anxious and then fixated on how often she was going to get food.
She is naturally very slim and tall and went through puberty early so it took us a while to notice that while she hadn’t lost that much weight, she also hadn’t put on the weight she should’ve.
We live in Australia and were lucky enough to get into a private psychologist who specialises in disordered eating quite quickly. We supervised her meals and decided how much she should be eating. Plates were broken, there was shouting and tears. We let her go on school camps and trips but a teacher supervise her meals.
It took 6 months for her not to panic if she’d “overeaten” and, 2 years on, she’s much better. She eats very little sweet food but will have a plain burger or pizza when out with friends and will eat to her appetite at home. She is still slim but looks healthy, she’s probably 6kg up from where she was.
Things that helped were restricting her internet use and checking it as she was looking at terrible YouTube videos from randoms promoting the latest “clean eating”. We also emphasised physical complications such as bones and fertility and cognitive issues such as poor focus. She still sees the psychologist but more for monitoring now, during the last session they apparently mainly talked about the Vampire Diaries 🙄.
She is still very rigid about not eating foods that aren’t “safe” but these are reducing in quantity and safe foods now include homemade baking and pretty much anything we cook. She’s a bit wary about meals about but this is getting better. Last night she and I went out and she had wedges and pizza and didn’t angst afterwards.
I know it’s different in the UK but the earlier you can get specific eating disorder help the better, before the disordered cognition becomes entrenched.