How to make the will fair

[Xanthe68]

A friend has asked for my advice-

A woman marries, she and her husband have two children, they work hard and are lucky and end up with a flat in London (approx £1.5m), a house in the country (similar) and investments of about £2m.

After a long happy marriage the husband dies. The woman inherits his share. 10 years later the woman begins a relationship with another woman- they live together and and they are very happy together for 5 years (and ongoing).

The woman wants to write her will. What should she do? All her wealth comes from the period of her marriage (both partners contributed) and was thought of as the children’s inheritance. But she’s worried about her new partner who doesn’t have much (not lazy- has worked hard all her life in a low paying profession).

WWYD? FWIW the children are very happy about their mum’s new relationship and it’s probable that the late husband would have been as well (based on how he was in life). Would you leave everything to the kids or something to the new partner? (Unmarried).

They are just 'partners' at this stage, anything could happen. First off, she should discuss this with her children. I wouldn't leave property, as when the partner eventually dies, some total random (not sure if she has kids) would get it and that seems massively unjust to your friend's children. I wouldn't even state that she could continue to live in the house. Maybe a lump sum, maximum would be proportionate to 1/3 of 50% of any savings, which were joint with her DH. Anything more and I'd think her late DH would turn in his grave, however happy he would be that she's found a new love.

A friend of mine was the new love interest in a similar situation. When her partner died she was left a life interest in the property, reverting to the children on her death.

It's clear that none of you have had a second partner that you love just as much as the first. I stand by 50% to partner, 50% split between kids (clearly state's two kids)

First I would leave a life residential interest for the partner in one of the properties, whichever one they consider their home, with agreement that the property goes to the two children upon the partners death.

The other property would then be added to the estate value, and from that total I would leave 1/3 to DC1, 1/3 to DC2, 1/3 to partner.

So each child gets a financial inheritance plus eventually the remaining home to split, and the partner also gets financial inheritance (theirs to do what they like with in life and after death) and use of their home for life.

50 percent husband's half split between kids and sit wife's share into 30 percent new wife and 70 percent between children. On basis relationship only 5 years long. If 20 years then leave wife more.

Everything accumulated pre-marriage, or post marriage from those marital assets going up in value divided between the children.

Any assets accumulated post-divorce unrelated to the existing assets divided as she sees fit (probably equally split) between kids and new partner.

It's a five year relationship? Then even less to the new partner.

I wouldn't leave a lifetime interest. They are very wishy washy and ties down the new partner to the children when they could want nothing to do with each other. I would leave a lump sump instead.

50% (late husband's share) directly to the children, and the new partner gets maybe 10 to 20% of the remaining half (wife's share).

I like this. Seems fair, if it leaves the new partner enough to have a home and live comfortably.

When my grandfather died he left everything 50/50 to my dad and aunt, with their step mum being allowed to live rent free in the house until she passed, then they were free to sell.

She was responsible for electricity, water etc and my dad and aunt paid for any maintenance.

Their mum passed when I was little, and he was married to step mum for 20+ years.

Everyone was happy with the arrangement.

Life interest for spouse to remain in the house with spouse liable for upkeep and costs unless she commences a defacto or married relationship, then the life interest terminates.

House can be sold unless children want to keep it. Proceeds as follows:

100% of Fathers share of house and assets to go to their children.

Mother's portion of assets pre 2nd relationship goes to the children allowing for inflation increases.

Whatever interest/growth occured on cash assets after Mother established her 2nd relationship to be divided by Spouse and Children equally.

£4M to kids and £1M to partner
Partner is then well looked after and kids have £2M each which is nothing to moan about.

£1m to a partner you have been with only 5 years? That's crazy.

Your kids are your kids.

This is a relationship, and a pretty new one at that.

Kids come first, always.

My mum's in this situation (not such big amounts but she is disproportionately wealthy compared to her partner).

First step is your friends needs to speak to her partner and her DC. My mother's DP wouldn't want to stay in the house because she wouldn't be able to afford to run it plus she sees it as my mother's house. My mum has also discussed extensively with me and DB to check we're ok with it/ won't vindictively evict her DP one day after she dies (I tell her to spend it enjoying life but leaving an inheritance is very important to my mother!).

What my mother has ended up on is a lump sum to her DP, basically enough that her partner will be ok (DP has a lot less money) - can afford to buy a little flat (what partner has said she wants) and to top up state pension. Rest split between me and DB.

I do think 5 years is a short relationship in this context though. Remind your friend that she can always increase the amount given in the will later (eg in 10 years time).

£3m to the kids, £1/2m to the partner. I think that’s generous to the partner as they’ve only been together 5 years.

It's not just generous, it's insane.

This is a person who is just in a relationship with her. Compared to her children!! She has also only been with them for what, less than 2000 days! I mean, honestly. A decent partner would not expect someone to give them anywhere near that qt the expense of their own kids after such a tiny amount of time together.

I would leave it to the children, but let the spouse live on the house your friend shares with her, until death or remarriage, whichever comes first. That was what my mother and stepfather had in their wills. They divorced, he died, but totally unexpectedly, he left her money in his new will.

Leave a specified amount to dp and everything else to kids. Or one house to dp and rest to kids.

It's a big estate. Get financial advice first so it's more tax efficient. Possibly gift some now to the kids.
Again for the will, get legal advice. Otherwise it could be challenged.
I'd go for all to kids, partner has life interest which stops after over a year cohabitation with a new partner or moving house, plus pension (assume she has one to give? maybe not?) and life insurance payout.

Smart play if the mother is not unwell would indeed be to transfer as much as possible to the children now. Including house titles etc. Do tell your friend to speak to a fonancial adviser asap!

Inheritance tax is only really paid by those who do not trust their kids, or do not really care about their family's future. It's completely avoidable.

Husbands share split equally between DC, Wife's share split equally between DC & partner with a right to remain living in one of the properties for life.

So you would leave just as much to a relatively new partner that you would to your own children?

As I believe in reincarnation, I would leave it all to myself.