Bloody instagram !!

[lollipoprainbow]

If you have an amazing life, husband, money etc why don't you just enjoy it without feeling the need to splash it all over Instagram! Why do people do this ??

YABU,

you only see a very small portion of people’s lives. I don’t care much for Instagram but when I do post it does seem like I am living the grand life (and partially I am), I spend 90% of the year traveling (a lot of the time for free), I am in a career where I make very good money and work at a scale now where I can take a few months off of work a year without having to worry about it and I am genuinely happy and love my life BUT I also had a very shitty abusive upbringing and loads of trauma and bad things to overcome including poor mental health for a good chunk of my life, so some of us worked super hard to be where we are at, and it might seem we have it all but you have NO idea what we sacrificed or lost or went through to be where we are at.

A lot of my friends envy my life and I don’t blame them because my current life is great, and seem appealing, but most people wouldn’t actually want my life if they actually had to put themselves through the first 20 years of my existence on this planet to obtain it.

Unfollow people you can’t stand and work at changing the course of your own life. There is no reason why you can’t be happier than you are now, but it’s not by being bitter and resentful of others that you will get there. What are YOU doing to have the life you want to live and would make you happy? Maybe start there.

I think you need to work on yourself.

No-one owes you a better life and the fact you don't have one isn't the fault of the Instagramers.

Just delete your account and stop diverting your attention away from doing something about your own situation.

Or she could just keep posting on Instagram? Everyone doesn’t have to do it the same way. Different strokes for different folks and all that.

Every meal out has to be posted and this morning a selfie with everyone commenting 'wow stunning' I'm sorry I just find it bizarre.

Maybe people see beauty where you don’t. Look at why you hate other people having nice things.

I would advise you to leave social media even if for a month or two. Delete the apps rather than deactivate your account and see how you feel.

Everyone posts the best about their lives, however some are more fortunate. One family may post photographs of camping trips and meals out at standard restaurants. Another family may post photographs of luxury holidays and meals at Michelin restaurants. I agree it feels a little crap to see others living it up (designer wear, 5 star holidays, home renovations) when you are watching the pennies. Before SM you did not have a window into such a large majority of people's lives. You were unaware of what they did, who they did it with, when they did it unless they told you or you heard it via a mutual friend/family member.

It is your responsibility to manage what you see and what you do not see.

Hard drives and SD cards can be corrupted, lost, damaged, or simply become obsolete. How many people who had camcorders in the 80s/90s now have old VHS tapes gathering dust? Instagram and Facebook are far less likely to become inaccessible in years to come.

In any case, no one has to justify the existence of their Instagram page. The fact that alternatives exist doesn’t mean people are obliged to use those instead.

Your jealousy is a bigger issue than her posts. Address your own issues first otherwise social media isn’t for you and will pull you further down.

YABU. You see a small portion of their lives, no matter how much they post. Unless they're uploading videos of their full 24 hours - you don't know what's happening.

And to just assume all is perfect, is in my opinion, really naive of you.

People can put up what they want. When they want. It says more about you and your mental state to begrudge it.

Mute them, unfollow them, do whatever you need to do until you're in a better place.

Whilst trying to conceive and after a miscarriage, I muted those who were pregnant. Felt no guilt in it. If an acquaintance announced their pregnant, I congratulated, then muted. And it helped me massively. I took the space I needed, and when I felt better I unmuted. And their posts no longer bother me.

I hate the narrative that people posting nice bits of their life on social media must be secretly unhappy.

Exactly. Why are people so desperate to assume there is some hidden misery there?

I’ve had a couple of jokey comments on my Facebook page about how I’m ‘always on holiday’. Yes, I do enjoy holidays and tend to post pictures of nice views etc., but that’s precisely because it’s something unusual. I don’t post pictures of the view from my window when I’m working from home, as I can see that every day (and no one else would be interested in seeing it). So yes, people see more of the good bits, but it’s not some desperate attempt to present a perfect version of my life. I just think ‘Here’s a picture of a beautiful beach’ is a bit more exciting than ‘Here’s a picture of the toasted sandwich I made because the bread is past its best and I can’t be arsed to go to Sainsbury’s’.

Also, I had a friend, happy, bubbly, everyone's best friend, always going to social events, life and soul of the party, small child, lovely husband, amazing house. One look of her Instagram page and you'd be convinced she was the luckiest girl in the world.

Turns out she was suffering severe depression for years and this resulted in her attempting suicide.

Hence why I reiterate that assuming, from what you see on social media, that everyone is happy as Larry and living out the perfect life YOU want, means F all. You'll never ever truly know what's going on behind the scenes.

There's no reason to folliw anyone on Instagram whose posts piss you off. I only follow knitting and journalling accounts. It's very relaxing

If a person is genuine and enjoys life then why shouldn’t she be able to post about? Share her experiences with her friends? Its her actual life, why should she hide it to pacify people like you? Sorry to sound classic mumsnet but you know where the unfollow button is!

Fully agree with this.

I'm currently sitting on the sofa in stinky pjs I've worn all day WFH, hair not washed, face full of the worst spots I've experienced in years. Am I going to post on Instagram? no.

Will I post this weekend when I'm loving life on my all inclusive holiday that I've saved my ass off to afford. Yep, it'll be cocktails on the grid all week!

Because she isn’t happy! She hasn’t got it all. She is posting because she craves attention and for someone to tell her how amazing her life is… because it means it isn’t!!

speaking from experience… I have posted before for attention, because the likes and comments made me feel good, temporarily!

Those who are truly happy and content with all aspects of their lives (not that many people I doubt!) don’t feel the need to do this

@Whodoiwanttobe I genuinely believe to assume you know the ins and outs of someone's life from what their posting on Instagram is ridiculous.

But I also find your generalisation slightly ridiculous too.

When I've been at my lowest, I've never posted. No energy, couldn't be bothered.

I only post when I've come out of it and I feel happy and like im enjoying myself again. And wanting to celebrate that. I get all the same likes no matter what I post, because I only have close friends on there. And chances are I'd be telling me what im at anyway, so don't need their approval by liking the post.

"Hard drives and SD cards can be corrupted, lost, damaged, or simply become obsolete. How many people who had camcorders in the 80s/90s now have old VHS tapes gathering dust? Instagram and Facebook are far less likely to become inaccessible in years to come."

Hmmm well I have more trust my hard drive than in FB. If people are interested in their VHS tapes they wouldn't be gathering dust. Not sure I see your point.

Anyway, my point was that some people use FB/ Instagram as a personal photoalbum whilst also feeling unhappy with other people's posts. There's no need for that as if you really are doing it just for yourself there are other ways of recording your own life.

Validation. That’s it. They can’t live a happy and fulfilled anonymous life.

This is definitely why some people I know do it. The validation. When I say they blog minutiae detail, in real time, I'm not exaggerating. They post several times daily sometimes. Like I said, nice people in real life, but too too much with this malarkey. It feels like spam and I hide them.

I like to hear how people are doing otherwise, and I'm pleased for them and their good news. The bloggers I don't care for.

The more people show off on Instagram, the less impressed I am by them. Who the fuck stages their lives for photos and validation.

What about if you die and a member of your family say a sibling or cousin takes the hard drive for “safe keeping” and loses it or never gives it to you or makes it hard to access it sells it when they need some money…

People do all sorts of harmless things to make themselves feel better. Let them. If people are sad in your own life, change it. It’s not healthy to be so upset about someone else having a nice dinner or seeing a sunset. Certainly dont expect someone else to hide their joy just because a stranger can’t handle it.

Enjoying your life is not vanity or attention seeking, what a simplistic way to pour scorn on another person. Maybe Instagram isn’t for people like this.

Unfollow and get on with your life

It doesn't sound like it's Instagram you don't like. You just don't like this particular person.

I first started going on Instagram after I lost my baby at 39wks pregnant.
Met a lot of baby loss mammas through IG and the support was incredible. In comparison this is the time I stopped using Facebook as with the posts on there I had less control and I would sometimes end up very sad/ triggered (think baby announcements, etc).

It's been a long time since and now I mainly use Instagram just to advertise my shop. It's become harder to make real connections since the new algorithm, prioritising reels, etc. I still don't use fb.

So definitely just do what you need to do for you. If many accounts on Instagram are making you unhappy just delete the app. If it's the one person I'd unfollow or mute.

Does she though?

I imagine she's only posting the good bits.

So why would you be on Instagram at all then?!

Instagram and Facebook have become replacements for the adverts we can skip on tv due to Netflix/ Disney plus and prime video etc. Its all about networking and selling a lifestyle with these influencers. I take everything with a pinch of salt on social media