Spending DSs DLA

[Dlabaddie]

So Not a TAAT but something that often comes up in threads and has currently.

The discussion on what you're allowed to spend DLA on.

We've always put a proportion in one pot for him and anything specific he needs, and the rest in the household pot which covers household bills Inc those which are affected by his disability. We've done this on the basis of me having to quit work to care for him and carers being such a generous amount. DP works but wage isn't great.

But should I be recording where every penny goes and justifying it so extra clothes say due to vomiting with receipts but also proof I buy most of his clothes from our money? £5 towards electricity as bedding washed extra die to vomiting? Lots of people on the thread saying it can basically be checked at any point how it's spent but how do I make sure I keep proper info?

I keep a spreadsheet of DLA use but only as I am a foster carer. I spend on any medical needs like glasses and prescription swim goggles, cricket gear which is expensive, karate kit and fees for belts, Maths and Science tutors, 1-1 cricket coaching. That is it mostly spent. In almost 11 years of fostering this child SS only ever checked it once, after about 5 months. 2 SS's have come and gone and none have wanted to see spreadsheet. I only keep it up in case one day someone wants to see it. At end of each month any left goes into his saving account. If it is your own child I can't think who you would keep records for? SS surely just spend it on for benefit of child.

Well I can't work , the just under £400 a month and universal credits/income support don't make up for that

Presumably people with higher incomes are able to spend more on activities/hobbies etc where is here it goes on the very large electric bill, replacing clothes he chews and shoes that constantly need replacing due to toe walking and the specific foods he eats

@Dlabaddie technically yes you could be audited by the dla if they suspect or have an allegations that you aren't using it for the child's needs. However in reality they almost never do. Just keep receipts for any big items you buy and any therapy/private treatments or regular expenses specifically for your dc due to their disability if you are worried but odds are that you will never need it

DLA is to cover extras that your child may need, some months they don’t need as much, sometimes they need a parent to be home with them so the parents has to give up work, so it can go towards living costs to cover that. Things ours goes towards….

To replace damaged items, sometimes this is furniture or carpet so can be expensive. One day my dd decided to cut up all her clothes and bedding with scissors she took from school, I had to replace all her clothes and bedding. She often ruins her bedroom carpet and her bed.

To pay for fuel and parking for hospital appointments, sometimes we travel quite far for appointments.

Private physio (because the nhs waiting list is huge).

Holidays and days out, dd2 hates being at home during the summer holidays. Sometimes being out saves the house getting damaged and keeps dd busy, she enjoys a stay in a travel lodge every so often 😬.

Shoes, she needs supportive shoes which can cost £100 a pair, she gets through 4 or 5 pairs a year.

Special food, dd2 is lactose intolerant, dd1 has sensory issues around food and will only eat certain things (for example she will only eat birdseye cod fish fingers which cost twice as much as Tesco’s own).

Pets, we like to call them therapy pets, dd1 has a few and they cost money to feed and keep.

Lego, it’s the one thing that keeps dd2 entertained on a rainy day or if I need to get on with other things (or if I am unwell).

Im sure there are many other things but I’m just pointing out that the money does get spent and it is very much needed.

I imagine they warn everyone who is an appointee that their spending may be checked. I doubt it would be unless there was actually an investigation into fraud though.

If there was and it turned out you spent no extra on bills, food, things for a disabled person... BUT you did drive around in a two seater sports car... then yeah, you could be in the doo-doo.

I suspect that sometimes happens, particularly when families split and there is coercive control and financial abuse.

I can't see it happening without some triggering action like a fraud report - it would cost far too much money to be checking and quizzing people on whether their leccy bill is so high because of their kid or because they like to swan about in just their kecks all day long.

When you claim for yourself, theres no checks and its entirely up to you what you spend it on. Might spend all mine on cake.

IF, and that's a big if, there is an investigation, that's normally prompted by the child's needs not being met, not just how the money is spent.

Well yes, it’s an average, I did say that in my post. The point I was trying to make is the majority (and it is the majority) of families with disabled DC have additional costs.

In the Scope research, only the first quintile’s average had disability benefits that outweighed the extra costs associated with their child’s disability. And the proportion of families that applies to is less now than it was in 2019. The average for the rest of the quintiles had extra costs that significantly outweighed to income from disability benefits.

"Not every person on PIP / DLA has high costs."

Which people? Which disabilities that mean the person is entitled to DLA or PIP give a benefit level that is not in keeping with the extra financial costs of having that disability ?

Now no @Sockwomble stop with the logic. It's nasty stuff!!

It Depends how you look at costs.

DS is on oxygen and is tube fed. We get a rebate on the use of electricity for the concentrator and provided with milk for his feeds. He does one extra class regularly and ad hoc ones outside but we'd def try to afford those regardless I think. He doesn't wear through clothes more than average now (he used to vomit a lot so always buying spare clothes and replacing stuff), we don't pay for therapy (he gets Speech through school and doesn't need anything else). Even hospital appts which would require bus fare and brave reward are down to less than half a dozen a year.

However, it's not easy to find child care for a kid on o2, let alone the type that would have been needed for my job so I don't work. I spent his babyhood back and forth to hospital, toddler hood back and forth to groups trying to get him socialised and back and forth for appts, his early years always ready to drop and run if he needed me at school and back and forth for appts.

So his "costs" after a while were just my wages.

I currently still don't work because I have twin babies so even if he's more suitable for wrap around care (so hard to get here tho) I still can't work, so I'm not sure that he costs me much more than a typical 7 yo (bar 4-6 appts a year) so perhaps he shouldn't be entitled to it any more.

Do you not pay out for any sensory toys, or any medical equipment? Does he have different food to yourself? Do you have to pay extra for a more qualified babysitter if you ever need to go out? Does he have a certain bed, pay high on rent to live in a certain area or type of house? Does he need a certain type of clothing around the oxygen machine? Also with the cost of gas and electric rising this is definitely a cost you will see an increase in over the next year. These are all extra costs I’m struggling to see how a child with your medical needs has no extra costs. Like many of us parents with children with additional needs you may not notice what they are as you are used to paying for them and don’t see them as extra anymore.

Perhaps think of it a different way? I don’t know anyone who wouldn’t give every penny of dla back not to qualify.

I dont keep a record. I do have it in my head that his therapy came out of dla or the thing he needed like a sensory toy or the extra heating where he is home much more.

No, I don't think you have to be able prove to anyone how it's spent.

If you have to spend it on foods, electricity, washing powder etc as part of his disability care, that's where it goes.

My mate gets PIP - given the current cost of living, she is literally spending it on her household bills and cutting back on paying for help in the home which is what she really needs.

Do you not pay out for any sensory toys, or any medical equipment?, no
Does he have different food to yourself?, I buy now cheese than I would otherwise
Do you have to pay extra for a more qualified babysitter if you ever need to go out? ha. No, we use Nan now for short trips but early fly now than an odd hour
Does he have a certain bed, pay high on rent to live in a certain area or type of house?
Does he need a certain type of clothing around the oxygen machine? no
Also with the cost of gas and electric rising this is definitely a cost you will see an increase in over the next year. not sure but I think our rebate pretty much covers it in debit

He is still in night nappies and was in day nappies until 5 and we do thus own more waterproof and normal sheets than I otherwise would and so more washing.

His money does get used for his after school club and like I said the main financial difference is I don't work vs being in a career for nearly two decades with the promotions etc that comes with. If I went back now I'd be back at the bottom.

ToddlerIs2 I would be surprised if there weren’t hidden costs you have become accustomed to.
 For example, do/did you have costs associated with:
Extra heating costs.
Higher electricity costs e.g. associated with night wakings or are the feeds via a pump, do you have an air purifier.
Driving/getting public transport or a taxi to places to you would otherwise walk.
Hospital stays.
Do you buy anything extra due to DS’s medical needs e.g. tape that adds up.
Then there’s the costs that aren’t everyday cost e.g. significantly higher travel insurance.

As an aside, some people are eligible for hospital travel costs reimbursed.

This whole argument is pointless. There is no 'average' non disabled child costs nor 'average' disabled child costs. Its all so personal to the child.

Some parents of disabled children who had a good career had no choice but to give up their job to look after their disabled child, however, many were intending to become a sahm whether the child had disabilities or not.

Similarly, some non disabled children have more needs than others. Children with high IQ can cost much more than a child who isn't because of their need to be more intellectually challenged.

Ultimately, it comes down to the parents to do the right thing in their good conscience.

Children with high IQ can cost much more than a child who isn't because of their need to be more intellectually challenged.
Nope.

Disability benefits are paid to help cover the additional costs incurred because of the disability and to provide sone income for working age people who are unable to work because of their disability.

You don't need to justify the spending to anyone. Your child is part of your household and therefore uses all the resources needed in running your home (plus extras like a higher heating bill to keep him or her warm), the car (regular family trips together but also extra mileage for hospital appts) etc.

I don't see anything wrong in DLA/PIP being part of the household budget, while also being used to buy disability related extras. You've no need to worry.

^ This

@5zeds, so you don't think high IQ kids don't have specific needs? Some do, they really do. Not being challenged mentally can lead to mental health issues.

I'm not talking about clever kids, but those who are on the high scale of IQ.

It doesn’t have to cost money to challenge as child with hi iq. You’re being ridiculous and conflating need with disability.

I don’t think you can conflate IQ and extra cost of disability. There isn’t going to be any correlation at all there.

I think if court of protection is involved you need to account for everything, but not DLA

We all get the letter and it states that isn’t your money or your partners, you are basically there to receive it in your bank and allocate it to your sons needs. The dla could come back to you at anytime and ask where that money has gone. It states in the letter that it is there claim not yours and they can come back and look at that claim at any time.

This is sheer BS, and it's 'their' not 'there'.

It is to cover the extra cost of the person's disability. That could be anything. Even this government knows that anything could be claimed eg a takeaway because you are too tired after looking after your child, a cinema ticket, petrol, electricity.

They know they are getting a bargain paying DLA / PIP and not providing care.

I had DLA from the 1990s and now get PIP, no one has EVER questioned what I spent it on.